Tuebor
by Hugplx
Summary: He had two friends in the entire world. One betrayed him and the other disappeared. His desire was to always protect those who couldn't protect themselves, but now he's finding it hard to stay motivated, yet still, he remains strong. AU.
1. Prologue

Prologue:

The school playground was a popular place for the children of the Konoha Ninja Academy to pass the time during their hour-long lunch breaks. Spending their entire mornings listening to their teachers drone on and on about the history of their prestigious village, and other such boring nonsense, was tiring enough on its own without being forced to sit through it on a daily basis.

That was one of the reasons why their lunch breaks were such joyous occasions. Being forced to sit and pay attention to a teacher lecture you on something you can't understand the importance of yet can be just as draining as the hardest of physical workouts. The daily lunch breaks allowed for the children to stretch their legs, good off, and prepare for the practical lessons at the end of the day.

The Academy itself was occupied by children of varying ages, from as young as five, to as old as twelve. It was a large, five story building with many classrooms to accommodate for the vast number students, all of whom had the same desire – to become powerful warriors and serve their village to the best of their abilities. Next to the school building was a large, mostly empty yard that held two dozen training dummies lined along the wall that was used for their practical lessons.

It was beside the large training yard, in the playground set up for the younger attendants of the academy, which had the most activity this morning. A group of first year academy students were organizing a game of 'Hunt the Missing-nin' - a glorified 'ninja version' of hide and go seek that the academy children thought more appropriate for mature young adults such as themselves.

The game began with three children being elected as the team of 'hunter-nin', and their job was to locate, and 'eliminate' the evil missing-nin, who would use tricks and abilities they had learned from the academy to hide from the 'hunter-nin' team, the missing-nin obviously being played by everyone not elected to be a hunter-nin.

A glorified hide and go seek that the 'cool kids' always played . . .

Uzumaki Naruto, a rather small five year-old boy with sun-kissed blonde hair, cerulean blue eyes and three whisker-like scars on each cheek, approached the group of children with a beaming smile and his hands interlocked behind his head in an effort to hide how nervous he was feeling.

"Heya!" he greeted cheerfully, catching the attention of his classmates, all of whom were at least three to four years older than him. "Are you about to play hunt the missing-nin? Can I play? Huh? Please? I promise I'm really good!"

There was an awkward silence that accompanied his question, only for one of the larger boys in the group to step forward to give his answer. "Look Uzumaki . . ." the slightly round and bulky boy's face scrunched up in thought, seemingly thinking of an appropriate response. "It's . . . err . . . nothing against you or anything, but you're too young to play . . ."

"Yeah, you need to be at least this tall to play!" a rude, black-haired boy joked, placing his hand several inches above Naruto's head to show that he was, indeed, too short by their rules.

"Yeah," the first boy agreed with his rude friend uneasily. "What Shinji said . . . you'll get hurt if you aren't tall enough to play, you understand right?"

The smile on Naruto's face didn't diminish in the slightest, despite his feelings on the matter. Naruto would have been lying if he'd said he hadn't been expecting the obvious lie. There was no hurt in trying though, right?

"That's okay, can I watch then please?" he asked politely, just as he'd been taught. "I promise I won't ruin anything or nothing like that! I'll be really quiet! Honest!"

Apparently, it wasn't to be.

A girl with light-brown hair stepped forward, her green eyes locked on her shoes as she voiced her opinion. "My parents said that you're a troublemaker and that I should stay away from you," she said to the smiling blonde in such a quiet voice that the others struggled to hear her over the noise of the other children on their lunch break. "They said I'd be grounded if they saw me anywhere near you, so if he sticks around, I can't play, I'm sorry . . ."

Emboldened by her admission, some of the other children in the group who had abstained from voicing their opinions for one reason or another came forward.

"My mother said the same thing . . . if he plays, I'm leaving," a pudgy girl snobbishly declared, looking down at Naruto as if he were more disgusting than the boogers she often picked from her nose and flung at people during class.

A scrawny, spectacled boy stepped forward and followed the pudgy, snot-flinging girl's admission. " . . . Same here," the quiet boy exclaimed, with no further clarification.

"The same goes for me," another girl spoke up, flinging her red hair over her shoulder imperiously. "My birthday's coming up, I don't want to risk my presents by getting in trouble, just go away!"

"Beat it shrimp, before you get us _all_ in trouble!" Shinji once again exclaimed rudely with a menacing sneer before turning his black on Naruto and proceeding to organise the teams once again, as if he hadn't been interrupted at all. The other children seemed to catch on, as they all turned their backs on Naruto and proceeded to ignore him as if he'd never approached them in the first place.

Feeling his normally unbreakable will starting to crumble, Naruto quickly spun around, his forearm covering his face, as he silently sprinted to the unoccupied swings on the other side of the playground. Nobody ever used the swings, they were deemed to be too 'immature' for ninja in training. Naruto flung himself into the seat of the middle swing and clung tightly to the chains, his entire body trembling uncontrollably. For some reason, Naruto always found comfort in these swings, similar to how a regular child found comfort in their protective mother's embrace. He hung his head low as his eyes began to sting and his vision began to blur.

Naruto didn't know why he was so upset. It's not like this was anything new to him. For as long as he could remember, he had been ignored and given the cold shoulder by pretty much everyone in the village. In fact, the only people he could remember having any kind of conversation with at all were the nice people at the Ramen stand he often visited, and the always kind leader of their village – the Hokage.

In fact, now that he thought about it, they were the only people that even bothered to spare him a second glance. They were the only people who even bothered with acknowledging his existence. He had no real friends to speak of, especially since he only saw the Ichirakus when he could afford a nice meal, or the Hokage when he needed something.

What kind of loser had no friends, and nobody to love him?

Naruto fought off a fresh wave of sorrow when he realised how badly he had failed in his latest quest for friendship. How pathetic must he be to feel that it'd have been better to be beaten up, instead of ignored and left out? At least then, they'd be forced to acknowledge him, even if only to coordinate an attack on him.

It seemed that no matter how hard he tried, it didn't make a difference. The Hokage had told him over a bowl of Ramen that all he needed to do was give the other children time to see the real him, and then everything would fall into place. He had said that once they saw what a wonderful and charming boy he was, that there was no way they wouldn't want to play with him.

For the supposed strongest and wisest man in the village, the Hokage seemed to be pretty stupid.

He had heard some of the girls in the class complain about how much of an eyesore his bright orange clothes had been, so Naruto, not wanting to annoy the people he was trying to befriend, went without groceries for a whole fortnight so he could buy a new, less garish outfit. To buy the outfit itself was another task he had had to overcome on its own, as none of the shopkeepers seemed to 'have his size' when he entered their stores, despite the fact that he'd seen several boys his age and size come in and out of the stores he'd visited with new clothes.

It was a testament to his unwavering determination that he didn't give up right then and there, like many others would have in his position.

To combat the obstacle of the unhelpful shopkeepers, he had gone so far as to learn the Transformation Jutsu to aid him in his task. The Transformation Jutsu was an advanced technique for an Academy student that allowed a ninja, once mastered, to take the shape of anyone, or anything they so desired.

He'd managed to learn it after many hours of spying on his upper classmates practising the technique during their free time.

Naruto used the technique to take the appearance of the boy he'd spied on to practise the technique, and asked to purchase clothes for his younger brother who was, coincidently, the same size as Naruto.

It was probably the best day of his life, being treated normally for a change, like an everyday customer in need of some new clothes. Seeing as the civilians he fooled to purchase clothes had no way to recognize him, they treated him much more amicably – normally, even.

He had worn his new outfit the next day, hoping for some positive feedback, only for him to be ignored again – though, the girls did stop complaining about his horrid fashion sense.

Changing his clothes wasn't the only thing he had done in an attempt to win over his classmates though, not in the slightest. He had one day noticed that the boy who was at the head of their class seemed to be admired or respected by all of the other students as a whole. So, Naruto, noticing and desiring to be treated in the same way, had studied harder than ever before, bringing his marks up so high that he was tied second in the class!

That plan had backfired as well.

Instead of winning over friends with his hard efforts, like he had hoped, they only became meaner, and colder towards him. Sometimes going so far as to say hurtful things to him to put him down. Apparently, they didn't appreciate being knocked down in rank to make a place for someone like _him_.

Nothing he tried seemed to work.

Was he such a horrible person that he couldn't even earn one friend? Lots of people had friends, it wasn't normal to have no friends, Naruto knew that much. Maybe he should just stop trying? Maybe he just wasn't supposed to have any friends? It was probably for the best, he was always told that adults knew best, and they all thought he was a bad person . . .

Maybe they were right.

His absent-minded swinging and brooding came to an abrupt halt when he heard the sound of crunching gravel behind him. So excited was he that someone may actually be coming to talk with him, he actually forgot he was still on the swing. Naruto swivelled around in his seat quick as lightening, eager to see who had approached him, only to get tangled in the chains and slip off the seat with a painful thud. Rubbing his behind in pain, he slowly righted himself and locked eyes with the person who had approached him, immediately recognizing him as the number one student in their class.

The boy had a set of piercing onyx eyes and thin black hair and long bangs that framed the sides of his small face. His skin was incredibly pale and, upon closer inspection, he looked rather tired. He wore a wide collared turtleneck sweater that had a picture of a white and red fan on the front, beige shorts and black ninja sandals. He'd seen the fan symbol before, mostly on the people who came to pick the boy up from the Academy, but never knew its significance.

Naruto was most surprised by the fact that, unlike the other kids in his class, the boy wasn't looking at him with disinterest, malice or annoyance. Instead, he was looking at him with a mild curiosity that, honestly, annoyed and unnerved Naruto slightly.

"Your attempts to win them over are useless," the boy pointed out bluntly. "It is clear that they have no intention of ever befriending you. Why do you keep trying?"

Naruto stared dumbly at him for a few moments before his face split into a large grin, ecstatic that someone was actually speaking to him, and not the other way around, even if it was more of a casual observation than a conversation.

"I'm trying to make friends!" Naruto defended his actions with a jovial tone. "I've never had one before, but they look like fun," Naruto whispered wistfully before adding with a fiery determination, "I'm not giving up though, I'll get one eventually. Believe it!"

If the boy was surprised by his admission, he didn't show it. He just continued to gaze at Naruto with his calculating and unnerving stare. "You're not doing a very good job," the boy pointed out matter-of-factly.

"Ehehe, I'm working on it," Naruto chuckled forcefully, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "Say, what's your name?"

The boy continued to stare at him for several more moments before finally breaking the silence, "Uchiha Itachi," he answered slowly, and a little cautiously. It was as if the boy wasn't sure how to answer the question properly, "I don't have friends either." Itachi admitted. He stared at Naruto for a few more moments before continuing, "Father says they are useless to a powerful ninja – does that make me abnormal?"

Naruto chuckled nervously as he scratched the back of his head, something he often did when embarrassed. "I don't know what 'abnurmall' means, but I have an idea!" Naruto proclaimed as he sprung to his feet energetically. "If you don't have friends, and I don't have friends, _we_ should be friends," Naruto concluded with a self-assured nod, proud with his brilliant deduction. He acted as if he had just solved the world's greatest riddle.

Itachi tilted his head curiously, observing Naruto as if he were some strange, and interesting puzzle. Naruto was getting uncomfortable again as Itachi continued to examine him as if he'd like nothing better than to dissect him. It wasn't until the bell sounded, signalling the end of their lunch break that Itachi finally decided to reply.

"I don't have much use for friends, and I doubt my father would approve," Itachi explained indifferently, as if commenting on the weather.

Naruto let out a sigh that relayed his disappointment and resignation. He was so close to finally making a friend too! Being the longest and most interesting conversation he'd _ever_ had with someone his own age, things were really looking up.

"However . . ." Itachi continued thoughtfully, snapping Naruto out of his brooding. "You have shown a great amount of aptitude in the ninja arts by already learning the Transformation Jutsu . . . I'm sure father wouldn't object if you and I were to train together after school on occasion."

Naruto stared at him with a dumbfounded expression for many reasons. First and foremost was because he didn't understand half of the words that were coming out of Itachi's mouth. Secondly, Naruto had never heard the normally quiet and stoic boy string so many words together, the boy usually kept to himself during class and breaks, after all. Then, there was also the fact that the boy somehow knew that he had learned the Transformation Jutsu! He hadn't told anybody! Not even the old Hokage!

"How did you . . . wait a minute . . ." the question immediately died in his throat when he realised something. Itachi hadn't said he didn't want to be his friend, in fact, he had asked if he wanted to train with him! Friends trained together, right?

"You do not wish to train with me?" Itachi asked curiously, not sounding disappointed, or relieved at the prospect. Naruto found it weird.

"NO! I mean, yes, I do," Naruto said excitedly. "Does that make us friends though? I really want a friend . . . I promise I won't tell your father!"

Itachi's lips twitched slightly, a direct result of the weird boy before him. "I suppose," he agreed slowly. "That is, of course, if you can keep up with me during training."

Naruto rose to his feet, a determined glint in his eyes at the challenge Itachi had no so subtly sent his way. "You've got yourself a deal!" Naruto exclaimed happily, clasping Itachi's hand in his own like he'd seen so many other people do with their friends, and shaking it once.

Naruto couldn't have been happier. Maybe the old man was right after all?

He finally had a friend.

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_Five Years Later_

"Heh, we're awesome," Naruto proclaimed with a huge grin. Walking beside him were his two team-mates, ten year-old Uchiha Itachi and fourteen year-old Uzuki Yugao. Yugao smirked down at the shorter blonde boy in a condescending manner and pat his head gently.

"You know what they say, huh?" Yugao asked in amusement. "Big things come in small packages . . . and you were probably the smallest package in all of the Chunin exams."

"Yeah . . . I was pretty awesome – HEY!" Naruto exclaimed indignantly as Itachi let out an annoyed sigh.

"Stop teasing Naruto, Yugao," Itachi requested in an unnaturally mature tone for someone his age. It was as if this was a common occurrence amongst the trio of newly promoted Chunin.

It was.

"Come on Itachi," Yugao pouted and crossed her arms stubbornly. "You always stick up for Naruto, why don't you ever take my side?"

Itachi remained silent for several moments before responding, "The fact that Naruto is unusually short is irrelevant . . ."

"Hey bastard, you aren't exactly tall either!" Naruto cut in angrily, only for Itachi to ignore him and continue speaking.

" . . . Whatever," Itachi turned his face from Naruto to hide his amused smirk. "Sensei gave us the rest of the day off, my mother should have just finished making lunch, would you two care for some? She makes excellent cakes."

"_Would you two care for some?_" Naruto mimicked Itachi's voice with scary accuracy. "Stop talking like a weirdo," he accused crossly, only for his stomach to growl defiantly. "Lunch does sound pretty good though . . . but you two should just go without me," Naruto suggested with a large grin. "I've got a few things I need to do anyway."

Yugao and Itachi both shared a troubled look before Itachi spoke up, "My parents will not cause you trouble again," he assured his friend. "We have just been promoted to Chunin, ninja with _leadership_ responsibilities, at our young ages, is it not expected of us to celebrate such an event?"

"You guys go ahead without me," Naruto insisted, ignoring Itachi completely and jogging away backwards for a few steps before turning and making his way to his apartment. "I'll see you both tomorrow for team assignments, have fun!"

Itachi and Yugao both stood in silence until Yugao let out an aggravated sigh, "Why does he have to be so difficult?"

"He has his reasons," Itachi defended his friend in a monotonous voice. "I need to make a stop by home first to let my parents know of my promotion. I'll meet with you later."

"Aww, Itachi, who would have known you could be so sweet?" Yugao cooed as she pinched his cheeks affectionately, much to the boy's annoyance, "I need to go and tell daddy about the promotion, he'll be so proud!" Yugao declared happily, before bidding Itachi farewell and speeding off towards her home.

Itachi looked off into the direction Yugao had sped off in with an annoyed frown before making his own way to the Uchiha district.

The Uchiha district, while one of the largest in Konoha, was not one of the richest. That wasn't to say that they were hurting for money, as having a virtual monopoly on the Police Force within a Hidden Village proved to be very prosperous for the clan.

Removing his sandals at the front door, Itachi entered his home and immediately saw his mother at the kitchen sink with his five year-old brother Sasuke sitting at kitchen table, a look of excitement on his little face when he spotted his older brother.

"Big brother!" Sasuke cheered, pausing from his pre-school homework as Itachi crouched down to his level and poked the giggling boy in the forehead.

"Hello Sasuke," Itachi greeted with a small smile as Sasuke frowned and tried to look at the spot his brother had tapped on his forehead without success. "Have you been behaving?"

Uchiha Mikoto spun around at the sound of her youngest giggling. She gasped in shock at the sight of her eldest son wearing the light green, armoured tactical vest that labelled him as a Chunin ranked ninja.

"Itachi! You were promoted from Genin! What excellent news!" she exclaimed happily with a large, beautiful smile. "Your father will be so pleased!"

Mikoto was surprised when Itachi turned his back on her without the slightest hint of having heard her before making his way towards his bedroom. Before completely leaving the kitchen however, Itachi paused in the doorway and spoke to his mother without facing her. "You'll have to tell him yourself," Itachi informed her coldly. "I have some place more important to be tonight."

Mikoto's eyebrows rose in surprise at her son's unusually cold attitude, it was so unlike him. Itachi was usually such a polite young boy, nothing but respect for his elders – especially his parents.

Wondering the reason for her son's grouchy attitude, she continued preparing lunch for her family when her eyes landed on the calendar.

October the tenth.

So _that _was the reason for his attitude. The Uzumaki boy was now affecting their home lives! She hated the change in her son's personality ever since befriending that home-wrecking brat. She wished she had her loving Itachi back, she wished that he had never met and befriended _him_.

Never once had she considered that Naruto wasn't the one to blame. Never once had she considered that, like everyone else in the village, she was just using the emotionally battered boy as a scapegoat for her problems.

It was easier to be a sheep, after all.

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Naruto flattened out his Chunin vest for what must have been the hundredth time that night. As soon as he'd arrived at his crappy two-room apartment, Naruto had removed his newly obtained vest and laid it out flat on his small futon, a sense of pride surging through him every time he laid eyes on it.

Against all the odds, he had succeeded. An unremarkable boy with no friends, no family, and no help whatsoever had done the unthinkable! He had not only graduated years early from the Ninja Academy, but he had been promoted to a Chunin level ninja at such a young age! It took most ninja many more years to earn this promotion. He was so happy that all thoughts of his neglect and poor treatment from the other villagers had completely left his mind. That was until he remembered what date it was, of course.

"Oh . . . right," Naruto sighed warily, looking at the small slip of paper by his bed that had 'Oct 10' written on it in big, bold ink. "At least this year I got a birthday present!" Naruto exclaimed happily, flattening out his Chunin vest once more.

Every year on his birthday, and during the festival hosted by the village to commemorate those who had fallen on that fateful night ten years ago, Naruto would order himself a horribly overpriced and poorly made pizza. A treat, as he so rarely ate anything other than the cheap and delicious instant ramen offered to him by the Ichirakus.

Padding over to the table by his sink, he took a seat on the floor and opened a fresh carton of milk before lifting the lid off the box of pizza. Naruto bent down low over the box and inhaled deeply as a cloud of steam rose up from the pepperoni and cheese covered delicacy, enjoying the smell of his dinner immensely. It may have been slightly burnt, and the cheese on the pizza's base a little scarce, but that didn't affect the smell any – it smelt delicious!

Naruto chugged some milk straight from the carton before taking a large piece of pizza and folding it along the middle. He was just guiding it to his mouth when there was a loud knock at the door.

"Bastard manager," Naruto grumbled, glaring at his front door angrily. "He's probably here to give me my _birthday present_, more fees to add to my already ridiculously high rent," he said sourly. Ever since becoming a ninja of Konoha, Naruto had had to put up with these yearly 'rent increases' thanks to his greedy asshole of a landlord.

Funny, no one else living in this shitty apartment complex had to put up with this crap, and he bet _they_ at least had working hot water and round-the-clock electricity.

Ever since he started receiving the frequent pay-cheques that came with his profession, the greedy manager had seen it his civic duty to charge him out the ass for pretty much anything he could think of – maintenance fees, quality living fees, laundry usage fees (on top of the pay per use washing machines), pest-control fees . . .

When he had flat out refused to pay the man any more than he already was, the landlord had not so gently informed him that if he didn't like it, he could always leave and find another place to live.

Right, like that could ever happen. He lived in _the_ shittiest apartment complex in the entire village. Dogs didn't even want to piss on the walls of this place, it was that bad. Even the _rats_ had moved out many years ago for better accommodations.

Smart rats.

What kind of asshole would do that to a ten-year old orphan anyway?

He'd tried to arrange to meet with the Hokage regarding the issue, mainly for some legal help and advice. However, his requests for meetings had 'mysteriously' gone unanswered.

Naruto knew this was not the old man's fault. It was probably that bitch of a secretary that dealt with his ridiculously busy schedule. She probably tossed the request straight into the trash can the instant she saw his name on the form.

There was another knock at the door as Naruto angrily picked up his pizza box and stormed towards the front door yelling obscenities along the way.

"You've already taken all of my god-damn money! You want my pizza too you fat piece of shi -?!" Naruto stopped dead in his tracks, his arm pulled back ready to throw his birthday dinner in the landlord's grubby and oily face, his own face frozen in a look of shock.

As soon as he'd opened the door, any thoughts of throwing his pizza and continuing his rant completely left his mind at the sight of the purple haired Yugao in a pretty dress holding a birthday cake with ten lit candles atop it, smiling brilliantly at him. Beside her stood a stoic faced Itachi wearing a shiny orange party hat with a rather glittery party blower resting between his lips. He had a large, thin package held by his side.

Giving the device in his mouth a quick blow, the curled up paper attached to the end of the whistle shot out and hit the stupefied Naruto in the middle of his forehead, before curling back, much to Itachi's amusement.

"Happy Birthday Naruto!" Yugao greeted happily, choosing to ignore Naruto's stupefied expression in favour of giving him a peck on the cheek. The boy was so shocked he didn't even blast Yugao for potentially infecting him with cooties.

Naruto looked down to see Itachi standing on the body of his groaning manager, who was face down on the tiled floor outside his front door and looking pitiful, as always. So _that's_ why Itachi looked taller than usual.

"Well, are you going to let us in? Or are you waiting for the candles to burn out?" Yugao asked impatiently, as Itachi gave his party blower another swift blow, hitting Naruto on the nose this time.

Snapping out of his shock, Naruto stepped aside so that Itachi and Yugao could enter, the latter deciding to set the chocolate mud-cake down on the table beside the carton of milk while Itachi handed Naruto his gift, while making sure to stomp extra hard on the landlord's head before making his way into Naruto's apartment, leaving the groaning manager to rest off his new injuries outside.

"What's this?" Naruto asked in a strangled voice, not sure what to make of his two team-mates arriving at his apartment so suddenly to supposedly celebrate his birthday with him.

"Open it silly, it's your present!" Yugao smiled at him, pausing in her wary inspection of his shady apartment. She knew Naruto was an orphan, but this was a bit much. "It was Itachi's idea, but we both paid for it, I hope you like it!"

"Hn," Itachi exclaimed around his party blower, not bothering to remove it from his mouth to give a proper greeting. As he was about to blow it again and hit Naruto in the face once more, Naruto grinned and flicked the quickly oncoming tongue of paper so it swung back and hit Itachi on the nose. The boy narrowed his eyes at the silent challenge, but chose to let it slide, given the occasion and all.

Naruto tenderly unwrapped the package; making sure to not tear the cheap wrapping paper. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to treat presents - he'd never had one before – but he wanted to savour the moment. When it was finally unwrapped, Naruto struggled to withhold a gasp when he saw it was a blown up portrait. The picture was of the three of them earlier that day, right after having been informed that they were the only Konoha ninja to be promoted to Chunin. In the middle, the taller Yugao had a large, radiant smile as she hugged both boys close to her. Both Naruto and Itachi had small, self-satisfied smirks on their faces – the former holding his thumb up for the camera – while all three wore their newly obtained Chunin vests.

The portrait was lined with a beautifully decorated bronze frame with an engraving going along the bottom of it that said _'The best team in the history of the world, Believe it!'_

Naruto's eyes stung as he stubbornly rubbed at them to still his tears. No words were needed to be exchanged between them, it was clear to Naruto that this was, without a doubt, the happiest day of his life. Without warning, he gently placed the portrait on the ground and launched himself at his surprised friends, his body trembling silently as he held onto them with all his might.

As Itachi awkwardly patted Naruto on the back and Yugao whispered kind words in his ear, Naruto was certain of one thing:

The old Hokage may have actually been onto something when he'd said that friends were the most precious thing in the world.

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_Three Years Later_

Naruto sighed warily as he strolled down the empty streets of Konoha, admiring how beautiful his home village looked when bathed in the ethereal light of the full moon. He had just returned from a particularly trying mission with his ANBU squad that had his team locating and infiltrating a hidden enemy base, obtaining as much information on their enemy's movements as possible, rescue any prisoners and then destroying the establishment.

It wasn't that the mission was particularly hard; it had only taken just under two weeks to complete, after all. The base itself only had one skilled ninja manning it, and she had quickly fallen against the might of Naruto's powerful four-man team. No, the reason for his wary sigh was because the completion of this mission marked his seventh successful high-ranked mission in a row.

It was getting tiring.

Sure, the pay was great - in fact, he'd never even dreamed of having so much money when he was younger - but the mental stress of constantly performing his village's dirty work combined with the physical stress that two hour power naps, constant travelling, and fighting in battles his own home refused to acknowledge ever took place was starting to take its toll.

Naruto was just glad that he had been given the entire week off, finally, for a small break. It was busy and dangerous times. Sure, they weren't currently at war with anyone, which many would see as a positive, but he knew better.

Not being in a war was better for the village as a whole, but it made his job much harder, and dangerous. If you get caught doing the missions he was assigned to do, there would be no cavalry coming over the hill to save the day. The village would cut all ties with you and erase all traces of your existence from their records.

After all, you never existed in the first place; you can't have existed, because that would mean that your village had committed an act of war by sending you into enemy territory with less than honourable intentions.

You can't commit an act of war if you send nobody into enemy territory, and that was what ANBU were paid for. To be the 'nobody' that got shit done. The shit that nobody talked about or admitted to, but everyone knew was needed.

To be honest, with all the stress his job put him under, Naruto was surprised that his body hadn't just given out on him yet, he was still only thirteen, after all. Most ninja his age are barely leaving the academy as Genin – the lowest rank in the ninja hierarchy.

To be honest, it probably would have given out already if he hadn't willed himself to not look weak in front of Itachi – he'd never hear the end of it, if he did. He and Itachi had a little contest going on between themselves that they told nobody about. The 'contest' was kind of in bad taste, as it was _technically_ betting on people's lives, but with little to no sources of entertainment other than their spars, they really couldn't be blamed. The contest was to see who would be first to fail a mission, no excuses. You fail a mission, your fault or not, you lose. The fact that neither of the boys would never put the success of a mission before their team-mates lives made the contest all the more harder, and exciting.

Both were still going strong, and neither looked like they'd be failing any time soon.

Speaking of his quirky best friend, Naruto quickly changed his direction and made his way over to the Uchiha district. He hadn't seen Itachi for weeks, and it was time he paid his smart-ass best friend a little visit . . . and maybe perv on his ridiculously attractive, yet somewhat rude, mother in the process.

Shame it was rather late, she would probably be asleep. He knew better about Itachi though, the prodigious heir to the Uchiha clan hardly ever slept. Naruto could sympathise. It wasn't easy to sleep after having been forced to witness what they had in their rather short lives.

War was a terrible thing.

Banishing those thoughts, Naruto wondered if maybe now they could discuss how he'd finally pluck up the courage to ask Yugao to go on a date with him. Sure, she was four year older than him, but come on! The three of them have been working together ever since graduating from the academy! From little green Genin, all the way to battle hardened ANBU, they'd pretty much always been working together one way or another. That had to count for something, right?

Heck, they would have been with him on his latest mission if Yugao hadn't requested for her week off sooner, and Itachi's father requested his son remain behind for some important clan business.

Naruto stopped dead in his tracks at the entrance to the Uchiha district as an ominous feeling swept over him.

Something was off, way off.

It wasn't until he smelt the scent of blood in the air, and lots of it, that he burst into action.

He ignored the several corpses littered on the ground around him, donned his porcelain ANBU mask and rushed towards Itachi's house, worried for his friend's safety.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Uchiha Mikoto backed away from her eldest son fearfully as he slowly advanced on her with his blood stained, ANBU-issued katana.

"W-what are you doing Itachi?" Mikoto asked hysterically, tears flowing form her eyes in torrents. "Why are you doing this?!"

Itachi chose not to answer; instead, he continued to advance on her slowly and deliberately. All signs of emotion wiped clean from his face.

Mikoto couldn't believe what was happening. Just ten minutes ago, she and her husband had been making love in their bedroom when the power to their house was suddenly cut out. It was supposed to be a magical evening; they had decided to try for another child, and had prepared for it by sending a reluctant Sasuke over to spend the night at a friend's house for some privacy.

They had barely begun when the power to the house was cut out, and before either of them could react, Itachi's katana was sticking out of her incredulous husband's heart – stabbed in the back by his own son.

Mikoto had tightened her silk robe to preserve her modesty while backing away from her son in fear. She had the skills of a Chunin, at best, having married her husband young at the request of her clan and halting her ninja career.

She was no match for her prodigious son.

Mikoto watched as Itachi raised his blade, his eyes locking with hers briefly as the crimson and black of the Sharingan spun wildly. He hesitated for only a split second before bringing his blade down in one swift motion, his intent clear as day.

Mikoto, frozen in fear, could only close her eyes and wait for the incoming blow to land and end her life. In the milliseconds before the blade connected, she found a myriad of questions popping up in her mind, one after the other.

Why was this happening?

Where had she gone wrong?

Was she such a horrible mother?

How could Itachi do this?

Why would Itachi do this?

What did she do to earn the obvious hate he had for her, to so easily strike her down?

What will happen to Sasuke?

Who will take care of Sasuke?

It was as these questions ran through her mind that she realised something was off, where was the strike? Why wasn't she dead yet? Seconds had past already; surely her son hadn't changed his mind at the last minute?

Opening her eyes almost reluctantly, fearful of what she may see, one after the other, she looked up from her position on the floor and gasped at the sight. A ninja stood between her and Itachi, one she could easily recognise despite his concealing attire. The ninja's clothing consisted of a mixture of grey, lightweight kevlar armour and tight black clothes that screamed efficiency. His arms were crossed in front of his masked face, holding Itachi's blade at bay with his extremely durable forearm guards.

Mikoto let out a quiet sigh of relief when she realised what rank this ninja held. It was glaringly obvious if you just looked at his uniform, and the red tattoo on his shoulder.

He was a member of the ANBU, Konoha's elite ninja force. It was their job to protect the village from the shadows and do its dirty work. Anonymity was a major part of their lives.

Unfortunately for this particular ANBU, it was not so easy to remain anonymous in front of someone like Mikoto. The sun-kissed blonde hair sticking out at all angles from beneath his mask giving away Naruto's identity in an instant. That shade of blonde was rather uncommon around these parts, after all. Also, not many would jump in the way of one of Uchiha Itachi's strikes, such was his reputation even before joining the ANBU's forces.

"What are you doing Itachi?" Naruto's voice, muffled by the mask, asked accusingly. Naruto's arms were still crossed and holding Itachi's katana firmly in between forearm guards. He only briefly made contact with his friend's eyes before focusing his attention solely on Itachi's chest. "I see you've got _those_ eyes," he noted. "I thought nothing was worth the cost?"

Itachi didn't answer him; instead, he kicked out with his right leg, hitting Naruto in the gut, before spinning around to decapitate his mother with a lightning quick horizontal slash.

Naruto flashed through a few hand seals at blinding speeds before slamming his hands into the ground as he fell. Once again, Naruto stopped Itachi's blade as dozens of extremely durable streams of what looked to be wood burst through the floorboards and surrounded Mikoto until they formed a protective cocoon.

Itachi knew better than anyone that nothing was going to break through the wooden prison, especially not his cheap blade. Flashing through his own set of hand seals, finishing with a tiger seal, he brought his right hand up to his mouth and launched a large fireball at the wooden prison, intending to burn it to a crisp, and his mother inside of it.

Naruto, always the quicker one at making hand seals, already had a wall of earth rising from the ground to take the brunt of the fireball before it could incinerate the wooden cocoon, and the woman within.

Naruto disappeared with a burst of speed and placed himself between Itachi and the wooden cocoon, his arms and body ready in a defensive stance.

"Itachi," Naruto's voice, muffled by the mask, spoke up again. "You know I can keep this up all day, how long do you think until the Hokage realises what's going on?"

Itachi still refused to answer him, but as he realised the truth of Naruto's words, he glanced once more at the cocoon before looking at Naruto.

"Killing her would have been merciful," he said in a voice completely devoid of all emotion before turning and disappearing with a burst of speed using the Body Flicker technique.

Naruto waited a few moments to make sure Itachi had indeed disappeared before letting out a sigh of relief. Naruto released his technique, allowing Uchiha Mikoto to fall free from the wooden cocoon that protected her from her son. Once freed, Naruto saw that she was sobbing quietly with her head in her arms. He wasn't even sure if she was aware of her surroundings anymore.

Realising that she had been freed, she locked eyes with her saviour before burying her face back in her arms, "Why did you save me?" she asked quietly. "I've never done anything to deserve your kindness, let alone anything to earn you risking your life for my own . . ."

"My life was never at risk, only yours," Naruto said confidently. "What happened?"

Naruto thought that Mikoto was ignoring him until she spoke up after a few moments of silence, "The power went out, and then Itachi killed Fugaku . . . then he tried to kill me. He got Fugaku before we knew what was going on. He killed his own father in cold blood!"

Naruto turned his head to spy the leader of the Uchiha clan lying several feet away from them on the hard wood floor, dead with a stab wound to the heart. As he continued to watch blood spill out of the small stab wound, he found it hard to summon up even an ounce of pity for the bastard that had done everything in his power to make his ninja career as difficult as possible.

"Why did you save me?" Mikoto asked in a quiet voice, breaking Naruto out of his reverie. "I don't understand, I've only ever been rude to you."

Naruto tilted his head to look at her curiously through the eyeholes of his mask. "So I should let you die because you were rude to me?" he asked mildly, bemused despite the situation. "You're a citizen of Konoha, I don't need a reason to save your life."

Despite the horrifying situation she found herself in, Mikoto couldn't help but feel shame well up within her. A boy, who, before today, could have died on a mission without any concern to herself, had valiantly fought to protect her despite having to fight his best friend.

The thought only brought on a fresh wave of sorrow. "How could he do this?" Mikoto asked nobody in particular, her voice muffled by her arms. "Itachi is - _was_ - such a sweet boy, how could he kill his own father in cold blood?"

"You don't know the half of it," Naruto murmured under his breath, which, luckily, went unheard by the distraught woman. She didn't need the knowledge of her son having not only killed his father, but everyone else in the Uchiha district that night adding to her grief right now. Lifting her chin up so he could lock eyes with her, he removed his mask and said, "Look, something terrible happened tonight, and while we may never know why it happened . . ." he paused, letting out a wary sigh before continuing. "I can say with completely certainty that Itachi is the greatest human being I've ever met. Do what you want with that information . . ." their little discussion was cut short when a shrill scream of a child pierced the silence of the night like a speeding arrow.

"Fuck!" Naruto cursed urgently.

"Sasuke!" the young boy's mother cried in despair.

"Stay here." Naruto ordered the distraught woman in a no nonsense tone. He may as well have ordered a ravaging bear to calm down, for all the good it would have done him. Knocking Mikoto out with a well-placed chop to the neck, he placed her over his shoulder and headed outside to the source of the scream, not willing to leave a woman who had recently had an attempt on her life alone in this situation.

Using the Body Flicker technique, Naruto appeared outside with a burst of speed to see Itachi standing over the quivering form of his younger brother with an emotionless expression on his face as his eyes glittered brightly in the dark. Itachi didn't even acknowledge his presence when he arrived and turned to walk away, but before he disappeared into the night, he turned back and locked eyes with Naruto, his Sharingan no longer activated.

Naruto remained silent despite the fact that silent tears were streaming down Itachi's face. "Look after them," he said, his voice cracking slightly. "This will be the last time, I assume, that we'll ever see each other again." He bowed his head briefly before raising it again, a smile that didn't reach his eyes gracing his fair features. "I guess this means you win our bet, though I doubt I'll ever be able to make good on the agreement . . . goodbye."

"Itachi, wait!" Naruto exclaimed urgently, but it was too late. Itachi quickly disappeared once again using the Body Flicker technique, and Naruto could only assume it was to flee the village.

What the hell had happened here tonight?

Why had it happened?

How could he, Itachi's best friend, not have seen this coming?

Itachi wasn't a homicidal maniac, he never did anything without reason, especially kill his freaking family!

He would find out what the hell happened tonight even if it was the last thing he did.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

Uzumaki Naruto's eyes slowly fluttered open as the ceiling of his apartment came into focus. Rubbing at his face tiredly, he looked over to the clock-radio that was perched atop his bedside table. He sighed as the red digitized numbers glared back at him, and let him know that it was just one hour until noon.

Breathing deeply through his nose, he pulled himself into a slouched seated position and, as usual, the first thing that grabbed his attention was the large framed portrait of his Genin team hanging on the wall opposite his bed. The picture he had received as a birthday present all those years ago always served to dampen his mood, so much so that he wondered why he hadn't taken it down yet.

_Probably because it's a reminder of happier times._ That thought came to him as he noted how happy and carefree they all looked in the photo.

Things were so simple back then. They'd train hard, they'd do their missions, and they'd hang out together afterwards. The perfect team, their sensei would say, despite the obvious distaste he held for one of its members.

Forcing his gaze away from the portrait, Naruto got up from his bed and staggered towards the bathroom, removing his underwear as he stumbled into the shower. The cold air on his naked skin wasn't exactly a welcome sensation, but he would soon make up for it with a nice warm shower, a fairly recent addition to the Uzumaki household.

Quickly finishing with his shower, he dried himself off with a soft towel before wrapping it around his waist and heading towards the kitchen. As if on autopilot, he flipped the switch for the kettle on and sat down at the kitchen table; a mission report sat open and half-finished in front of him. His job may be a well paying one, but the reports he was forced to file after every single mission were killing him. He was a ninja, one of the best; if he wanted to do paperwork for the rest of his life, he would have become a politician, or the Hokage.

He snorted in amusement. Perish the thought.

Finishing up the report, Naruto cut the power to the kettle and fetched a cup of Instant Ramen along with his regular coffee mug. Pouring the boiling water into the mug, he swiftly added coffee, milk and several sugar cubes before emptying the rest of the kettle into the Ramen.

"Ah, shit," he cursed dejectedley. He'd misjudged the amount of water he'd need to fill his cup of Ramen, which now presented him a problem.

Many options on how to rescue this already opened and soiled cup of Instant Ramen flashed through his mind - everything from just eating it as is, to adding tap water and microwaving it for a few minutes were just some of the possibilities.

His stomach growling forced him to quickly come to a decision. Taking his cup of coffee, he looked at it thoughtfully for a few moments before shrugging and emptying it into the cup of instant Ramen while stirring it thoroughly, humming an unknown tune to himself as he did so. He was too damn hungry to wait for breakfast.

Using his chopsticks, he shoved a bunch of the steaming noodles into his mouth and let it just sit there for several moments as he absorbed the taste. He chewed a few times, his face blank and his eyes closed before swallowing and going for a second serving.

"God, that's disgusting," he murmured distastefully before swallowing some more of the coffee flavoured noodles without hesitation, reminding himself to suggest the dish to his friends at the Ichiraku Ramen stand, if for no other reason then to hear his favourite waitress' delightful laugh.

Hearing the echoing screech of a hawk outside, Naruto let out an exasperated groan before walking over to one of the large windows to investigate. A small brown hawk was circling in the sky above his apartment complex and letting out its cry before flying back off towards the Hokage tower shortly after being spotted, its purpose served.

Hearing a shocked gasp, Naruto looked down to see an attractive girl around his age blushing and trying, but failing, to conceal the fact that she was openly staring at him. Her mother, on the other hand, tried to shield her daughter from the sight of an almost naked Naruto, scowling at him in the process.

"Morning!" Naruto greeted them flamboyantly from his fourth floor apartment, ignoring the angry woman, "Nice day, huh? A little on the breezy side though . . ." he made a show of airing his nether regions behind his towel.

The girl only flushed more when she realized that he was talking to her; the mother, however, wasn't impressed. She grabbed her daughter's elbow and dragged her along more quickly before barking at Naruto, "Have you no shame?"

"None at all, ma'am," Naruto assured her nonchalantly as he watered the pot plants he had hanging by the window with a smile.

The plants dealt with, he turned and flung his towel with a flourish over at the heap of dirty clothes by the front door. He reminded himself to do the laundry today, it was starting to smell in here even with the windows fully open. As he brushed his teeth, his cheerful demeanour vanished as he spied the small orange container sitting beside the washbasin. At a speed that suggested he just wanted to get it over with, he reached for the bottle and emptied two small yellow pills into his hand before throwing them in his mouth and swallowing them in one gulp.

Once done, Naruto headed to his bedroom and dressed in his standard ANBU uniform of grey armour over black clothes, his face hidden by a white porcelain mask. _They_ said the mask's purpose was to safeguard his identity, Naruto just figured it made them all look more badass and mysterious.

The entire process of getting ready took just under two minutes. Preparing quickly was an essential skill a ninja in his position had to possess if they wanted to be successful.

Just before leaving his apartment, he donned a large, hooded white cloak before using the Body flicker technique to speed his travel. His destination was the Hokage's tower at the base of the large monument made in tribute of Konoha's previous leaders – the Hokage monument.

Naruto briefly glanced at the four faces carved into the cliff-face that overlooked the village. The First Hokage and the Second Hokage, the original founders of the village, were the first two faces on the monument, followed by the Third Hokage, who was their student, and also known as the God of all ninjas. The last face on the monument caused Naruto to pause briefly as he glanced at it, the Fourth Hokage, also known as the Yellow flash, and said to be the most powerful ninja Konoha had ever produced.

Of the four leaders represented on he cliff, only one of them still lived, and he was currently sitting behind his desk as Naruto entered his office, a long wooden pipe held between his wrinkled lips.

The Third Hokage puffed out a small cloud of smoke as one of his best ninjas virtually appeared out of thin air on the opposite side of his desk in a kneeling position.

"You _called_, old man?" the ninja said with such cheek that the Hokage couldn't help but roll his eyes at the childishness. He had to keep reminding himself that this young-man was virtually single-handedly dealing with their village's security and continued wellbeing.

"At ease, Naruto," The Hokage replied dryly, knowing who this particular ninja was immediately, and thus, how pointless such a statement was. The now eighteen year-old ANBU commander always seemed to be at ease; at least, on the surface.

The Third Hokage knew better.

"Sure thing, Sarutobi," Naruto replied pleasantly, taking a seat in the chair opposite his village's leader. The informality in which he addressed the older man - and the lack of reaction from said man - spoke more of their relationship than any words could. "Not to sound rude or anything, but what'd you call for? I was supposed to have the rest of the day off – something you actually made _very_ clear last night, if memory serves."

"And as I promised, you will have the day off, at the very least, from your current duties," Sarutobi assured as he leaned back in his comfy chair. The Hokage was dressed in his ceremonial white and red robes that flowed around him and concealed the withering body beneath. His hat was tipped in such a way that it shadowed his eyes, but Naruto knew that the 'old Monkey' - as those closed to him referred to him as - was scrutinizing him sharply.

"So . . ." Naruto broke the silence. "Are you just going to stare at me all day? Or are we going to spy on the kunoichi at the hot springs again?"

Sarutobi coughed to hide his embarrassment, glad that no one else was in the room to hear Naruto talking about such things as if he were talking about the weather.

"Maybe next time Jiraiya is back in town," the old man conceded with a conspiratorial whisper. He'd rather die than have his secretary accidently overhear _that_ bit of information.

"Heh, I'm holding you to that you old pervert," Naruto promised, grinning behind his mask at the uncomfortable old man who was making wild shushing motions with his hands. "Remember how bad Jiraiya got the shit kicked out of him last time? I don't think he'll be so eager to join us the next time, what, with how we sold him out to those angry women and all . . ."

"Angry is one word you could use," Sarutobi said with a chuckle, glad that Naruto had lowered his voice. "I'd think 'homicidal' is a much better term though, don't you?"

"All the better that Jiraiya got caught, and not us." Naruto grinned. "So, perverted tendencies aside, are you going to tell me what I'm here for?"

"Patience was never one of your strong points," Sarutobi reminisced idly. "But, alas, you are right. I did call you here for a reason, and it isn't, unfortunately, a pleasant one."

Naruto sat straighter in his chair, recognising the need for professionalism when it was required of him. It was fine to joke with the old man – they were kind of close, after all – but being in his position needed for him to quickly realise that there was a time for jokes, and there was a time for work.

This was the latter.

"Hatake Kakashi has been hospitalized," Naruto knew better than to fire off the millions of questions that were running through his mind in response to that simple statement, so he sat back and waited for the old man to finish his report. "He, and his new Genin team recently came back from a C-rank mission in the Land of Waves. Unfortunately, the client misinformed us of the specific details of said mission, and what was initially marked as C-rank was most probably A-ranked."

Naruto frowned at that piece of information, but not for the expected reasons. Hatake Kakashi had been his superior in ANBU years ago and was an extremely capable ninja. Even if the mission he and his Genin team were sent on turned out to be an A-rank mission, he certainly shouldn't have had much trouble with finishing it. An A-ranked mission was nothing compared to the dangerous S-ranked variety those in ANBU were tasked with frequently.

"According to his report," the Hokage began in a slightly sceptical tone, "Hatake Kakashi said that his skills had become rusty ever since his retiring from ANBU, and it was this that caused him to slip up and be injured."

"You don't believe him?" Naruto asked the leader of his village curiously.

"I have my doubts," the Hokage lied smoothly, conceding that it wasn't his story to tell. Taking another puff from his pipe, he continued, "It will take a lot more than a year off from full ANBU duties to dull the skills of someone like Hatake Kakashi, however, that is the report he submitted, so that is the one we must believe until we have proof saying otherwise."

"You want me to investigate the issue?" Naruto asked with a frown. "How is this not one of my normal duties? You're not making much sense old man."

"While I would appreciate you look into the issue, that task will be secondary to your new one." He paused for effect and to make sure he had the young man's full attention, "Your new mission is twofold. The first part of it is to watch over two of the members of Team Seven, become their protector, as it were . . ." Sarutobi said, almost positive that Naruto's eyes had widened behind his mask in shock. "And the second part is to oversee the training of one Uchiha Sasuke. You will be doing this as their temporary sensei."

Sarutobi noticed Naruto's shoulders stiffen at the mention of the true purpose behind his new mission, "And if I refuse?" Naruto asked in a guarded tone – Sarutobi wasn't surprised.

"You cannot refuse," Sarutobi said gently. "This mission comes directly from the council and the Fire Lord himself; as a matter of fact, you were personally requested by him to be the one to take over as the Jounin sensei of Team Seven, in Kakashi's absence."

"You expect me to believe that the council are willing to entrust the welfare of, not only the last Uchiha ninja, but the Fire Lord's _only_ son to _me_?" Naruto asked in disbelief.

"I will be the first to admit that the members of Konoha's council are not your . . ." Sarutobi paused, looking for the right word, "_biggest_ fans, but do not make the same conclusion about the Fire Lord, especially when you do not know the man. And rest assured that, while the council may hold some animosity towards you for what you contain, they do not, and never will question your skill and loyalty."

"I still don't see how, or why, the Fire Lord would request me personally. My fighting style may be recognisable, but my identity is still kept hidden," Naruto pointed out curiously, before adding, "There aren't many in this village who know of my bloodline either."

"The Fire Lord did not initially request you by name," the Hokage conceded. "He requested my best ninja, and I offered him you. Naturally, due to the sensitivity of the situation, I was forced to give him your name. He had no real concerns and trusted my judgement. Originally, he was slightly uneasy with your young age, but a quick glimpse at your mission history was enough to assuage his concerns."

"You let him see my mission history?" Naruto asked incredulously. "Fire Lord or not, if he were to ever be interrogated -!"

"He was only made aware of their ranks and the success rate, nothing more," the Sandaime interjected curtly, an edge of impatience creeping into his voice. "I would kindly request you have a little more faith in your Hokage, Naruto."

"I'm sure I'd have a little more faith in him if he didn't spend the majority of his day with his hand on his decrepit penis while reading porn," Naruto mumbled scathingly, earning the ire of the aged man.

"What was that?" the Hokage barked angrily.

"Nothing," Naruto answered with a shit-eating grin.

The Hokage sighed wearily and eyed the youth before him with a neutral expression, "I know how you feel about the boy, and believe me when I say that I had no other choice in the matter, and I truly did look for other possibilities." Sarutobi eyed the silent youth before him, the ANBU uniform giving him an intimidation factor his normally cheery demeanour found impossible to obtain. "_He_ also would have wanted you to be the one to take this mission."

Naruto shrugged in an unconcerned manner. "What makes you think I care about what he thinks?"

"Because he was, and still remains to this day, your best friend," the Hokage reminded softly.

Naruto said nothing, so the Hokage took it as his queue to continue.

"This counts as a long term A-rank mission, but you will be paid your usual salary along with an added fifty percent extra upon completion. Call it incentive. The Fire Lord has also donated some of his personal funds to make sure his son is as protected as possible," Sarutobi grinned as Naruto's head snapped in his direction.

"Fifty percent of my _total_ wages no matter how long the mission is? Extra?" He parroted incredulously. "He must be pulling out all the stops, huh?" Naruto mused to himself as he looked out of the window. It was a beautiful day, too beautiful to spend it cooped up in this musky and smoke filled office with a decrepit and perverted old man – God of all Ninja, or not. "It'll free up some of my debts, that's for sure . . ."

"You need money?" The Hokage asked in surprise, as Naruto's head slowly turned to him. Even with his full uniform on, Sarutobi seemed to know what the boy was thinking. "I know where your pay goes," the Hokage snapped irritably, "but that shouldn't be leaving you in debt . . ."

"You know, this is an issue you should be taking up with your council, as I've asked you to a million times already," Naruto retorted dryly, a cynical emphasis thrown in for good measure.

"Is it that bad?" The Hokage asked with concern, "You must know Jiraiya or I would give you money if you ever needed it . . . especially Jiraiya . . ."

"I don't want your charity!" Naruto snapped angrily, leaning forward menacingly towards the Hokage as he did so. The god of all ninjas didn't look impressed.

"So Charity is only acceptable to you when you are not the recipient?" Sarutobi asked idly, though he didn't expect an answer from the stubborn blonde. He was just like his parents in that regard, infuriatingly stubborn.

"How long does the mission last?" Naruto suddenly asked, abruptly changing the subject.

"Until Hatake Kakashi is fit to resume his duties," Sarutobi paused as he took another puff of his pipe and read through a report before him, "Five to six months."

"_What?_" Naruto blurted out in shock. "What the hell _happened_ to him?"

"I believe that is something you should ask_ him_," Sarutobi replied nonchalantly, "You can do it when you go and speak to him about your new team – you are both acquainted, yes?"

Naruto shrugged "Vaguely; I don't think he likes me very much."

"Is it about -?" Sarutobi began to ask, only to be cut off by Naruto.

"Nope," Naruto answered with absolute certainty that startled the elder man. "He's probably just jealous of my awesomeness."

"Indeed?" The Hokage replied dryly, earning a shrug from the boy. If Naruto wasn't concerned, then neither was he. "You have no further problems with taking this mission then?"

Naruto levelled a deadpan stare at the old man from behind his mask. "We both know that I never had a say in the matter."

"True," Sarutobi conceded ruefully . "But I would much rather have a willing ninja under my command, than one forced to do his work – hey, don't walk away from me when I'm giving you an important lecture!"

"See you around old man," Naruto casually waved over his shoulder before disappearing from his office in a blur of speed.

"Such disrespect," Sarutobi grumbled angrily before reluctantly returning to the mountain of paperwork on his desk with a weary sigh.

* * *

Uchiha Mikoto yelped in pain as the needle she'd been using to mend her son's training clothes pierced her skin. She sucked on the wounded digit briefly in the hopes of stemming the blood flow while she searched for a band-aid.

This wasn't how she had planned on spending her day when she woke up this morning. Her son had unceremoniously dumped his damaged clothing on her before going out to his team meeting without so much as a word. Was it so much to ask for a 'please' or 'thank-you' once in a while?

Unfortunately, for her son, it seemed so.

She let out another sigh as she passed the black thread through the eye of the needle and continued to expertly mend the fabric. It's not like she had anything better to do; in fact, all she had planned to do for the day was to get her grocery shopping done and maybe work on her garden some.

Ever since the massacre of her family - something she tried hard to not think about – Mikoto hadn't had much to do with her time. Originally, she'd had a job as a secretary at the Konoha Police Department, working alongside her husband and aiding him in his duties. When she wasn't doing that, she was a devoted housewife that took care of her family of five – her two sons, her husband, and her father-in-law. In her spare time, she used to chat with the other women in the Uchiha district, trading gossip and bragging about their own family's achievements as they saw fit.

It was a nice - sometimes bland - life.

Now though, she found herself with an infinite amount of spare time, and not much to do with it. Sure, she still had friends, but that did little to lessen her boredom when she was home alone, and her son out performing his ninja duties. All she had left was her son, her garden and the few people she now considered friends that she chatted with on occasion - not nearly as often as she'd like.

Of course, there was also _him_. At one point in her life, she, like many other ignorant people in the village, would have only regarded him with disdain. Shameful of her past behaviour and ignorance, all she could do now was see the boy for what he truly was, and try to make up for past mistakes. The boy – now _man­, _she had to remind herself – had indeed become a big part of her life ever since that day, much to her surprise. In fact, it had gotten to the point where she couldn't honestly think of her life without having him around.

Any reasonable person would assume that, once his tie to their family had been brutally cut like it had, he would have disappeared into the night and never spoken to them again – and the thing was, nobody, not even her, would have blamed him for it. In fact, it probably would have been the sensible thing to do.

"Is there a reason why you're looking so glum?" A voice broke through her musings. Mikoto let out a shriek of surprise when the unnamed person spoke up from behind her.

"God Naruto, don't sneak up on me like that -!" Her words died in her mouth when her eyes locked onto the young man standing behind her. She almost let out another shriek when she saw him. Mikoto had honestly thought that she had been mistaken for the briefest of moments, and that somebody else had snuck up on her in her home, but the unmistakable golden blonde hair and cerulean blue eyes could belong to no-one else. Instead of being dressed in his regular ANBU attire, like Mikoto had grown accustomed to seeing him in, Naruto was wearing a black tee shirt over a long sleeved wire-mesh shirt and grey pants. The black top had two red spirals, one on each sleeve, while the necklace she remembered having purchased for him for his most recent birthday hung loosely around his neck.

What surprised her most though was the dark green tactical vest - awarded to those who achieved the rank of Jounin - covering his torso.

"I prefer my ANBU uniform, to be honest," Naruto confessed with a shrug, performing a few experimental stretches as he got used to the foreign clothes. "It's not that bad, is it? I didn't have much else in my closet to be honest," he admitted with a nervous chuckle.

Mikoto shook her head in the negative and raised her hands in a placating manner, "That's not it at all Naruto, it's just that it's been so long since I've seen you dressed in anything other than your ANBU cloak that you startled me. You look very handsome."

Naruto got a mischievous look in his eyes as Mikoto let out an amused snort.

"Not _that_ handsome! Honestly, teenagers these days, only thinking with their hormones, rather than their heads," she joked as Naruto fell to the couch beside her, his hands clutching his heart in fake pain.

"You wound me, my beautiful princess," he said melodramatically, earning a giggle form the older woman. "Oh well, can you at least gimme a kiss?" Naruto asked, closing his eyes and puckering up while making ridiculous kissing noises while slowly inching closer to her.

Mikoto then saw the bag of groceries sitting on the kitchen table, obviously delivered by Naruto. Giving him a quick peck on the cheek in thanks, she had to stifle a laugh when she saw him pout like a little boy who was denied his favourite toy. "There's your kiss _lover boy,_" Mikoto said with a wink. Naruto's constant advances always made her feel good, even though she would never react to them. It just reminded her that she was still a beautiful woman. "Thank you for getting the groceries; You didn't have to though. I was going to go later." Naruto waved off her thanks nonchalantly, as per usual.

Mikoto got up from the couch and moved over towards the kitchen so she could put away the groceries. Naruto's eyes followed the swaying of her backside with every step she took. "And stop looking at my ass you little perv."

Naruto's face split into a grin at those words, but his eyes didn't leave her behind, "So, is there a reason why you weren't answering the door? I knocked five times . . ."

"Sorry," Mikoto said apologetically, as she put the milk in the fridge. "I guess I was lost in my thoughts; it happens a lot lately." Naruto nodded in understanding as he made himself comfortable in the living room. "Are you going to tell me what's with the new clothes? I never knew you were a Jounin, I thought you were promoted to ANBU as a Chunin?"

"I was, but ANBU commanders get given the Jounin title as a default when you reach that level," Naruto said with a shrug. "But I'm not one of those anymore either. I've got a new mission, actually, that requires me being a Jounin."

"And what's that?" Mikoto asked curiously. Her hand clasped around a thick envelope hidden within the grocery bag filled with cash. She always felt bad about taking the money Naruto always gave her . . . but she really had no choice given her current situation.

"Sasuke's new Jounin sensei, actually," he informed the stunned woman. "Yeah, it's only temporary though, until Kakashi is fit to continue at least. The old man doesn't think that'll happen for at least half a year though."

"Jounin sensei?" she asked faintly, before a smile blossoming on her beautiful features, "You mean you won't be going on any of those dangerous missions anymore?" she sounded more excited than Naruto could remember her ever sounding. It was nice to have someone care for you.

"I guess so," he sent her a lecherous grin. "Though, what I'm still doing does construe as _dangerous_, so you better let me sleep with you just in case something happens and then, _bang_, you've lost your chance."

"Don't even joke about that," Mikoto admonished with a displeased frown. "And that line didn't work the last thousand times you used it, what makes you think it'll work this time?" she deadpanned, amusement dancing in her onyx eyes. "Why don't you go find a nice girl your own age to fool around with, hmm? You're still so young, and there's plenty more fish in the sea that could, I'm sure, tickle your fancy quite nicely. I doubt they could resist, especially if you rub on some of that charm you always waste on me."

"Oh my dear Mikoto, I only want _you_ to tickle me," Naruto confessed to her, getting on his knees and crawling towards the exasperated woman. "Why would I want to fool around with _girls_ when I have a beautiful _woman_ right here?"

"What about that nice girl at the Ramen stand? She's quite attractive, and she seems to like you too," Mikoto suggested, as she continued to put away the groceries.

"Ayame?" Naruto asked with a frown, "I've known her since I was a kid, ever since her and her old man moved here from lightning country way back when," he confessed before scrunching up his face in a grimace. "She's like a sister to me, I've never honestly though of her like that . . ."

Her retort slipped out before she could even think to stop it.

"And _you're_ like a son to me!" It was meant to be said in the flow of the conversation, slightly in jest but mostly true, but the effects were substantial nonetheless.

Following her confession, there was an awkward silence that lasted for several moments, as Naruto looked at her in shock. The seconds ticked by as Mikoto tried to busy herself with putting away the groceries, not willing to meet Naruto's eyes for fear of possibly putting a further strain on their unusual relationship, and making him feel even more uncomfortable than he must be feeling right now. She winced when, as she went to place some vegetables in the bottom compartment of the fridge, a sharp pain assaulted her lower back.

She almost shrieked again when Naruto's concerned voice sounded from barely a few feet behind her, "Are you okay?" he asked, the tone of his voice completely different now.

"Oh," she realised he was talking about her back. "I just strained myself when I was moving one of the larger pots outside last night," she confessed sheepishly. "I know you keep telling me to lift with my legs, but honestly, it's not at the forefront of my mind when I have a really heavy and fragile pot in my hands . . ."

Naruto clucked his tongue in annoyance as he searched for something in the living room. Mikoto looked on in confusion as he came back into the room with a pillow from one of the couches clutched in his hands, "Come on out back, you should have said you were in pain!" he admonished playfully.

"What? But . . . the groceries!" she yelped as Naruto grabbed her hand and yanked her unceremoniously towards the back yard. Before they left the house, Mikoto heard a pop coming from the kitchen as an exact copy of Naruto materialised out of thin air to continue her task.

"My Shadow Clone will deal with them, don't worry." He smiled as he released her hand and placed both of his own on the ground. Mikoto watched - still in awe no matter how many times she'd seen Naruto utilise his bloodline limit in the past - as a wooden bench _grew_ out of the ground until it stood at around waist height.

Mikoto flushed in embarrassment when she realised what Naruto wanted to do. "You don't need to give me a massage. I was just going to get it looked at later anyway . . ." Naruto shrugged off her protests easily enough as he placed the pillow at one end of the bench and motioned for Mikoto to lie down.

"You're hurt, this'll make you feel better, now lie down before I tie you to the bench," he said in a serious tone, but the mischievous look in his eyes belied any true seriousness.

Mikoto looked at the bench doubtfully before levelling a glare at Naruto, "Don't expect me to take my top off you little perv," she warned good-naturedly.

Naruto held his hands up in a placating manner while smiling at her. "I never asked you to, but if you feel so inclined, don't let _me_ stop you! I'm definitely down for this finishing with a happy ending!"

Without another word, Mikoto propped herself on the bench face down as Naruto rolled the bottom of her blouse up slightly, exposing the pale skin of her lower back to the world. Just when she was about to look up and see what was taking him so long, she let out a pleasurable moan as Naruto's strong hands found the knot in her back. He gently stroked the sore spot using long, firm strokes and as the skin and muscles started to heat up and loosen, he used a single finger to press a spot in her back that caused Mikoto to let out a loud, gutteral moan.

"Where did you learn to give massages?" Mikoto asked in an annoyed tone, wanting to know why she hadn't been treated to them in the past.

"I only learned recently," Naruto confessed as he continued to hold his finger on the muscle to release the knot. "For my ex, actually. I never got to give her one though, you know, so I guess that means you're my first," he joked with a perverted leer.

Mikoto steered clear form the topic of Naruto's ex-girlfriend, knowing it always brought up bitter memories he'd rather forget. She let out another moan of pleasure as Naruto found, and eased out another knot in her back.

"You know, this really _would_ be a lot easier if you didn't have your top on," Naruto confessed humorously. "Maybe next time I guess; I really need to go and meet Kakashi soon."

"What?!" Mikoto blurted out in surprise. "But you're not finished here yet!" she protested angrily.

"God, you're sexy when you're angry," seeing her eyes narrow, he laughed and continued with his massage. "I need to meet him to talk about my new team, remember? The one with your son on it," he reminded the woman as he continued with his massage.

"Screw the tardy bastard, let him wait," she declared gruffly, using her hand to hold Naruto's in place. "You've already started, so you're not going anywhere until you finish!"

Naruto chuckled at the woman, "I love it when you talk dirty," he joked, "If you want a proper massage, I need to get some oils that'll help ease your muscles, and you'll need to disrobe."

Mikoto shot him a glare out of the corner of her eye at him, thought she was hardly surprised that the little pervert was unrelenting in trying to see her naked.

"Hey, don't look at me like that," he said defensively. "You can use a towel to cover yourself, I don't care. It's just that the oils will stain your clothes."

"And what about Kakashi?" she asked with a raised brow, returning the smirk that suddenly appeared on Naruto's face.

"Let's see how the tardy bastard likes waiting for someone else for a change," Naruto said, earning a laugh from Mikoto. She had heard of the man's tardy habits all too often when Sasuke would come home in an annoyed mood after a long day's training.

"Naruto . . ." Mikoto began, unsure of how to word what she wanted to say. She opted for something simple, "Thank you."

Naruto knew she was thanking him for more than just the message, but he didn't see the need to point that out or acknowledge the fact.

"No problem."


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

"You're late."

"Annoying, isn't it?" Naruto countered, sending the man sitting in the hospital bed - his arm heavily bandaged and in a sling - an amused grin.

"Whatever," he peered over his little orange book and raised a curious brow. "You look a lot like him, you know?"

"Really? I'm told I look more like my mother," Naruto replied nonchalantly as he unfolded a wheelchair that he'd taken out of the cupboard. "I'm definitely not staying in_ here_ to have our little conversation."

"We're going out?" the man asked with a hint of excitement in his tone. Snapping his little orange book shut and pocketing it, he confessed sheepishly, "I don't like hospitals much."

"Who does, Kakashi?" Naruto asked the silver haired man. "So, act normal and we should be okay. The medic-nin here are fucking _mental_ when it comes not releasing patients early."

Kakashi nodded, agreeing with the young man's observation completely. Rolling out of his small hospital bed gingerly, he unceremoniously plopped down into the wheelchair Naruto prepared for him and motioned for him to go. He took out his book again and continued reading, while Naruto started to stroll him out of the hospital, as if doing so were permissible.

In truth, Kakashi had been 'asked' to remain in the hospital for at least the rest of the week so that the professionals could keep him under their watchful eye. Apparently his injuries – hairline fractures and the like – required intense supervision and careful observation to make sure nothing healed incorrectly. So, they had 'suggested' he stay.

Like _that_ was going to happen. He was a man of action, just like every other ninja in the village. It was virtually impossible to sit in one place for such an incredibly long period of time.

They would have been better off keeping him sedated for the duration of his stay.

Naruto whistled merrily while Kakashi continued to read his book as they made their way to the large glass doors that spelt their freedom. Some may have thought it suspect that the two were able to do so, especially since Kakashi was supposed to be under careful supervision, and that the medical ninjas of Konoha were notoriously famous for having a sixth sense when it came to keeping patients from escaping.

However, the fact that Naruto had decided to undergo this particular mission incognito – disguised as one of the attending medic-nin – satisfied the suspicions anyone may have had.

It was almost funny, Kakashi mused, at how easily Naruto was able to sneak him out of the building. Sure, he was a skilled ninja, which meant that infiltration and extraction was usually in his job description, but the other ninjas operating the hospital weren't exactly novices.

It never ceased to amaze the silver haired man that simply _acting_ like you belonged made tasks like this infinitely easier, and if there was one thing Kakashi knew that Naruto was good at, it was acting. The medic-nin working in the hospital were always extremely busy, which surprised no one considering the massive amounts of patients going in and out of the building daily, so it was of little surprise to anyone that Naruto was easily able to sneak out a high-profile patient.

The medic-nin didn't have time to go around questioning everyone rolling a patient around the hospital, so unless they noticed something that struck them as suspicious, they would be ignored.

A medic-nin carting an injured patient through the hospital, high-profile or not, was not something a busy medic-nin would find suspicious.

"Miss Haruna," Naruto called as he stopped at the reception desk, masking his voice just in case the young medic-nin in training recognized him. As an ANBU, Naruto had to converse with different people all the time, so much so that he couldn't possibly remember who may, or may not remember his voice. "I am escorting Mister Hatake to the Lord Hokage for a meeting regarding his previous mission, please sign him out."

The brown haired girl looked through her logbook in frustration, searching for an entry that would explain this 'meeting' that didn't exist.

"I can't seem to find it," she said crossly. "Are you sure that there was a meeting?"

"The Lord Hokage asked me to bring him personally," he said with a deep chuckle that was not his own. "I'm fairly sure there's a meeting. Don't worry, it's probably a mistake on his nurse's part, I'll just take him now and you can mark it down that he's fit to go – he shouldn't have much time left in here anyway."

"It says that he is under heavy observation," she said with a frown. "I'm not supposed to release any Konoha ninja under that status."

"I'm his doctor, Miss Haruna, and I'm telling you he's fine," Naruto said with exasperation. "Please sign him out so that we won't be late for our meeting, unless you wish to tell the Hokage that some silly paperwork is why he was kept waiting tonight?"

"No," she flushed in embarrassment as she quickly made some notations in the book. "No need to do that. He's free to go, thank you Mister Ryoji!"

Naruto chuckled again as he waved her off, "Not a problem Miss Haruna, you have a nice night now."

Naruto rolled the silent Kakashi out of the front door without so much as a second glance back at the hospital. It wouldn't be until later that evening that Yabuki Haruna would realise that she'd been duped when her supervisor chewed her out for letting a high-profile patient out early.

Naruto removed his mask and medic-nin uniform before throwing them in the dumpster nearby. "Get out of the chair you lazy-ass, I'm not rolling you there."

"Shame," Kakashi drawled as he stood up from the wheelchair, which, too, was discarded. Kakashi was wearing baggy blue pants and a tight black top that turned into a mask past his collar to cover the lower half of his face. His Konoha forehead protector, as always, was worn diagonally across his face so that it covered his left eye. Kakashi's arm was heavily bandaged, and still in a sling. "Congratulations on making Jounin, I suppose."

"I preferred my old job," Naruto conceded with a sigh. Kakashi sent the young man a troubled look, but said nothing at the admission. Nobody he'd _ever_ worked with enjoyed working in ANBU, especially not someone who had served as long as Naruto had. "How did all this happen?" Naruto changed the topic, motioning to Kakashi's injuries.

"I'm sure you've read the report -?" Kakashi asked, but the look Naruto sent his way stopped any further bullshitting on his part.

"If you don't want to tell me, that's fine, I don't care," Naruto confessed quietly. "But if it has something to do with the team I am supposed to be protecting for the next six months, I suggest you shape the fuck up and spill, because it's their lives you're risking, not mine."

Kakashi sighed wearily, acknowledging the truth in the blonde's words. Chancing another look at the young man beside him, he withheld a chuckle, recalling Naruto's first day in the ANBU corps all those years ago. The other members of his squadron had resented the trio of recently promoted Chunin for having earned places in ANBU at such young ages, often going so far as to take their frustrations out on them by means of cruel and undeserved pranks.

That didn't last long, however. In response, everyone who had seen fit to bother Yugao and Itachi had found the insides of their uniforms filled with timed seals set to release copious amounts of itching powder the second the wearer stepped foot outside the village. It was never proven who'd been responsible for it, but it didn't take a genius to connect the dots.

Sure it meant that Naruto, Itachi and Yugao had to work ungodly hours to keep up with the workload they had inadvertently created for themselves – Ninjas coated with that amount of itching powder couldn't possibly remain focused enough to do mission – but in doing so, they had earned themselves a solid reputation within the corps as reliable ninjas.

Kakashi had no doubt that that was part of their plan in the end.

"I'm entirely too sober to have this conversation right now," Kakashi relented as he lead Naruto to a popular bar in town he often frequented. "We'll continue this discussion over a drink."

The bar Kakashi had taken him to was bustling with activity. It was well decorated for such a place and had both an outdoor and indoor sitting areas. The duo opted to sit outdoors seeing as it was such a nice evening.

"I'm going to be honest with you," Kakashi said after taking a sip of his sake. "I would have failed this team instantly out of the academy if I was allowed to. Suffice it to say that before I even met them, I was told in no uncertain terms that failure was not an option, and I was to do anything in my power to make sure they passed, and succeeded."

"No surprises there." Naruto shrugged, having already guessed as much when he learned exactly who was on the team. "Why did you want to fail them?"

"They showed no concepts of teamwork whatsoever. Sasuke thought he could do everything by himself, and thus shunned his teammates from the beginning. Hideaki wanted nothing more than to stand out and prove himself a capable fighter, so he sought to show me his abilities on his own in the hopes of passing that way. Sakura, on the other hand, was utterly pathetic. She fainted after I placed a simple Genjutsu on her, but otherwise sought out Sasuke the entire time."

"Ugh," Naruto grimaced in disgust, his sake pausing on its path to his lips, "He gave me a fan girl? What the hell did I do to deserve this?"

Kakashi chuckled from beside him. "Believe me, I asked myself the same question many, _many_ times. However, despite that, she has actually got the potential to be an excellent ninja. She's very smart and has some of the best Chakra control I've seen on a student fresh out of the academy."

Naruto turned to him with an amused expression.

"Some of the best Chakra control I've seen in a _regular _Genin," Kakashi corrected with a deadpan tone.

"And the other two?" Naruto inquired, knowing nothing of their ninja abilities.

"Sasuke is your standard Uchiha, which says plenty of his ability," Kakashi explained with a shrug. "He's proficient in fire-type Ninjutsu and has excellent Taijutsu skills. He's already mastered his family's fighting style; I was recently working with him to perfect it."

"His Genjutsu abilities?" Naruto inquired, surprised that Kakashi had left out any information about the Uchiha's deadliest weapon.

"He doesn't have the talent, nor patience required to be as proficient as his brother was," Kakashi admitted darkly. "He has just recently activated his Sharingan though, so that may change."

"Doubtful, unless he actively pursues the knowledge in his family's technique scrolls," Naruto disagreed. "I sure as hell am not teaching him any Genjutsu, and I very much doubt the Council will be releasing those scrolls any times soon."

Kakashi's single eye observed Naruto neutrally for a few moments before giving a barely visible nod. "Doubtful indeed. Anyway, he's what you'd expect from the 'Rookie of the Year'. Extremely determined, skilful, clever and has an excellent learning ability. That boy absorbs techniques like a sponge."

"Did you let him copy any?" Naruto asked curiously; the Sharingan's ability to copy Ninjutsu being no secret to either of them, the village's experts on the family's eye technique.

"No," Kakashi replied promptly after taking another sip of his Sake. Naruto wondered how the hell he kept drinking without removing his mask. "I'm of the opinion that one should only copy techniques from your enemy, and only your allies when you have their explicit permission."

"Good," Naruto said with a sigh of relief. "Too many Uchiha used to think that it's their right to have access to any technique they desire, a character flaw all too common back then with that family."

"Unfortunately, Sasuke thinks exactly that," Kakashi informed Naruto with a sigh. "He was none too pleased to find out that I would not let him copy my original technique."

"He saw you use the Chidori?" Naruto asked with surprise. "You were actually forced to use it? I've worked with you on plenty of missions in the past - some even during a _war_ - and I've _never_ seen you use it."

"On our most recent mission, we encountered several B-rank and higher missing-nin," Kakashi explained darkly. "One of those missing-nin was the Demon of the Bloody Mist."

"Momochi Zabuza?" Naruto asked, recalling the man from his Bingo Book. The Bingo Book was a valuable information resource issued to most high-ranking ninja; it was pretty much a hit list containing a vast majority of the world's most dangerous and notorious men and women. It contained details and bounties on ninja both belonging to a village or without one. Momochi Zabuza was of the kind who had no village to call his home – not anymore – and thus, was known as a missing-nin. "The guy who killed off the rest of his graduating class, butchered them, as a part of the Hidden Mist's Ninja Academy graduation policy?"

"Yeah, he was also a member of the notorious 'Seven Ninja Swordsman' from the Mist. He ended up fleeing after a failed coup d'état against the current Mizukage," Kakashi sighed wearily as he rubbed his injured arm with his good hand, "He was also _very_ powerful."

Naruto looked at him dubiously, "From what the records say, he shouldn't have been too difficult to beat. He may have been S-ranked in ability, but you should have been able to counter him easily enough with your Sharingan."

"And I was able to, despite having to protect my team and the client," Kakashi said somewhat defensively – he didn't take well to people doubting his abilities as much as the next man. "It was the second time we faced off however, that he revealed a hidden source of power that surprised me."

"Hidden source of power?" Naruto asked dubiously.

"It was a seal on his neck that forcibly drew out more Chakra from his body than what should have been possible. It made him stronger, faster and increased his Chakra levels to ridiculous heights." Kakashi sighed, recalling his epic fight with the super-powered missing-nin.

"That sounds an awful lot like one of Orochimaru's Cursed Seals," Naruto replied darkly.

"You know of them?" Kakashi asked in surprise. He had thought that knowledge of the Cursed Seal created by one of Konoha's most hated criminals was a closely guarded secret.

"The Hokage ordered me and Jiraiya to study Mitarashi Anko's Cursed Seal a few years ago as a learning exercise," Naruto admitted. If the man was going to be honest with him, he may as well return the favour. "We both had a look at it and did what we could with what little information we had. It works well for her though, as you can see."

Naruto casually waved over his shoulder to a group of Jounin having some drinks of their own at a circular table not too far from them. Kakashi looked over and spotted the woman in question, Mitarashi Anko, laughing with some familiar faces.

"How does it work?" Kakashi asked curiously, continuing to observe Anko and his fellow Jounin having a good time. He was doing his best to be discreet; not wanting to draw attention to himself. He _was_ supposed to be hospitalized, after all.

"It basically suppresses its activation based on the willpower of the individual it's placed on," Naruto explained. "The more they resist its urges, the stronger the counter seal becomes."

"Amazing," Kakashi breathed out quietly. "Would you teach it to me sometime?"

"Ask the Hokage, he has the details in a scroll in his office somewhere." Naruto shrugged. "It's not exactly a secret."

"I'll do that," Kakashi confirmed. "You couldn't do anything more with the seal? Did you try to remove it? How about a way to neutralize its effects mid-battle?"

"We tried everything," Naruto admitted. "Unfortunately, as I said, we did everything we could with what little information we had. If we just had Orochimaru's notes on how he created it, maybe, but without them, we may as well be doing trial and error, and everyone knows that you never use trial and error when working with seals. _Especially_ when the seal in question is on a human being."

"Regardless," Kakashi intervened with an amused and lecherous tone to his voice. "Anko must have been . . . erm, _thankful_."

A sly grin and a faint blush graced Naruto's features as he recalled that memory. "Oh yeah, she let me feel her boobs for, like, five minutes straight after we put it on her."

Kakashi spat out his Sake and looked at him in shock. He was _joking_ for crying out loud, hoping to maybe embarrass the kid a little. He definitely didn't expect _that_. "How old were you at the time? _Sixteen_?!"

"Lower your voice Hatake," Naruto hissed angrily, peering over his shoulder warily to where the woman was laughing loudly. "I was _fifteen_ by the way. So it'd probably be best if you didn't yell it to the world."

"Liar, you're just scared of her overhearing you bragging," Kakashi deadpanned. Naruto didn't deny it. "Over, or under her shirt," Kakashi demanded to know authoritatively. Naruto just smirked wider as he answered in turn.

"Under," he confirmed proudly.

"Was her shirt on, or off?" Kakashi demanded once again.

"Off," Naruto was all too pleased to inform, his grin only growing wider with each answer.

"Nipples too? Or just the boob itself?" Kakashi asked with a growing sense of urgency that Naruto found highly amusing.

"Man they were great nipples," Naruto reminisced fondly, causing Kakashi's eyes to widen further in shock.

"Did she . . . did she restrict you in _what_ you used to feel her boobs?" he asked faintly.

Naruto sighed happily; taking a sip from his sake saucer before finally answering in a dreamy voice "They definitely tasted as good as they looked, maybe better."

Naruto almost laughed at the expression of shock on the Jounin's face, but dragged him back down to his seat when he looked like he was about to approach the purple haired woman and proposition her.

"Sit your ass down Hatake," Naruto advised. "She'd more than likely castrate you than let you touch her; trust me, she tried to do it to Jiraiya after he asked to go next."

Kakashi slumped in his seat dejectedly, feeling rather pathetic at how jealous he felt of the eighteen year old beside him.

"They were magnificent though, I have to tell you," Naruto said dreamily. "Perfect, pink nipples. A little on the big side, but I liked them like that, and the taste, my god, I don't know if its just her . . ."

"Alright enough!" Kakashi pleaded desperately, eyeing the laughing woman dejectedly, with an obvious leer at her breasts, barely concealed by the tight mesh top she was wearing. "I can't believe she let you do that . . ."

Naruto snorted at how pathetic Kakashi sounded, he was almost whining. "I think she was trying to corrupt me, to be honest," he said with a shrug. "Unfortunately for her, Jiraiya got to me _way_ before she could. I don't think she expected me to take her up on her offer, actually. I think I caught her by surprise."

"Lucky little bastard . . ." Kakashi continued to grumble while discreetly perving on the extremely attractive Special Jounin out of the corner of his eye.

Naruto chuckled as he took another sip of Sake before snapping his fingers in Kakashi's face to get his attention. "Tell me about Hideaki, his skills and what not."

"Who?" Kakashi asked, still in a daze and staring dreamily at Anko.

Rolling his eyes, he slapped the Jounin in the back of the head to grab his attention, "Hideaki? One of your students? Tell me about him."

"Oh, right, Hideaki," Kakashi replied, finally snapping out of his daze and focusing on the conversation. "Hideaki is an interesting one. He's had a problem with people taking him seriously because of who he is, or rather, who his father is, ever since becoming a ninja. I think that's the reason why his desire to stand out and be an individual is rivalled by no one.

"What are his abilities like?" Naruto prompted curiously.

"Well, being that no one in his family was a ninja before him, his repertoire of techniques is just as small as Sakura's," Kakashi admitted. "However, that doesn't mean he isn't skilled in his own right. The boy mainly fights with those ninja wires of his, and focuses mainly on deception as a fighting style."

"Ninja wire as weapons?" Naruto asked curiously. "That's uncommon, _and_ kind of cool."

"He's freakishly good with them too, to the point of defying basic physics on occasion. It's pretty amazing to watch, Kakashi said in agreement. "And if he can't trap or harm his enemies with his wires, he lures them into traps he sets up on the battlefield, and he does so with a cunningness that astounded me when he first fought me. A real genius of strategy, that one."

"What happens when his wires and traps fail?" Naruto asked the silver haired man.

"Good question," Kakashi answered honestly. "He retreated from me before resorting to his traps, probably thought they'd be of no use. I'd imagine he'd be kind of helpless without them. Why don't you let me know when you find out?"

Naruto didn't answer him this time, his attention seemingly elsewhere. Kakashi discreetly followed his line of sight, covering his attempt to do so by taking another sip of his sake. It really wasn't that difficult to find out where he was looking, nor was it difficult to discover who he was looking at, if you knew anything about the young man.

Two new members had joined Mitarashi Anko and friends at their table for a drink. The first was a sickly looking man wearing Konoha's standard Jounin outfit, his scruffy dark brown hair kept tame by a bandana while a katana was strapped to his belt. He had his arm around a woman, one that Kakashi recognized as not only the target of Naruto's attention, but the reason for his sudden change in mood.

The woman was quite beautiful. She had dark purple hair and smooth white skin. She was dressed in civilian clothing, but Kakashi knew that if he removed the bit of cloth form her dress covering her right shoulder, he would see the tattoo all members of ANBU are branded with upon joining. She had served under him during his time as an ANBU commander. The woman was Uzuki Yugao.

Suddenly, when the man placed a tender kiss on the neck of a happy looking Yugao, Naruto stood form his seat and made to leave when Kakashi stopped him by placing a hand on his forearm. "Problem?"

"I think I've learned all that I needed to learn, Kakashi," Naruto answered by placing a few bills on the table. "I'll see you around."

Before he could stop him, Naruto was already making his way towards the exit. Unfortunately, for the blonde, his ex-teammate easily spotted the mop of golden blonde hair now that Kakashi's own silver locks were no longer obscuring it.

"Naruto?" she suddenly called, earning the attention of not only her fellow drinking partners, but also the man planting kisses along her neck. "Naruto!" she called once again, but Naruto didn't stop when called, rather, he only hastened his exit.

Yugao made to chase after him out of the bar, but before she could catch him, he was already gone. Yugao stared at the spot she had just seen her former teammate at sadly for several moments before reluctantly returning to her friends.

Kakashi briefly wondered if anyone had seen Naruto drinking with him before his abrupt exit, but then dismissed the thought as quickly as it had formed. He honestly had more important things to dwell on.

Like what such a powerful lackey of Orochimaru's was doing in the Land of Waves, at the exact same time he and his Genin happened to be on a mission there.

"What was that about?" Gekko Hayate asked his lover when she returned to the table, a troubled look marring her features.

Yugao sighed irritably while running a hand through her long hair, "It's a long story."

"Yo, was that the Uzumaki brat?" Anko asked from the other side of the table with a notable slur to her voice. "My vision's a little blurry," she admitted with a giggle.

"Do you know many other Naruto's?" Yugao asked her older drinking friend dryly.

"I dunno, maaaaybe." She giggled before taking another sip of her drink. "How do you know him?"

"He was my teammate," Yugao admitted with a depressed sigh. "We've been teammates ever since we graduated from the academy together. We were inseparable up until around five years ago," she said sadly. "I haven't had a proper conversation with him since . . . "

"What happened five years ago?" Hayate asked curiously.

"The Uchiha Massacre," she looked away and answered darkly.

"What does that have to do with the two of you?" Hayate asked in confusion, while Anko's eyes widened.

Yugao didn't answer immediately. Her eyes were glazed over as she stared into space. With a nudge, Hayate grabbed her attention and asked his question again.

"Uchiha Itachi . . . was our teammate," she answered with a weary sigh, much to the shock of Hayate and the others within hearing range.

"You're telling me you were on a Genin team with _Uzumaki Naruto_ and _Uchiha Itachi_?" he asked her incredulously. "Why haven't you told me this before?"

Yugao eyed him with a raised brow. "You mean other than the fact that you never asked?" She shrugged nonchalantly before continuing, "It's not something I like to think about, you know. If you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly on talking terms with Naruto, and Itachi massacred his family – would you talk about them?"

"Why don't you and the brat talk anymore?" Anko butted in, hoping to change the topic away from the rogue Uchiha.

"It's not that I don't want to," Yugao said with a weary sigh. "You see what happens whenever we're in the same room together; he won't even _look_ at me, let alone _talk_ to me."

"That's nice and all, but that doesn't explain why he doesn't speak to you anymore," Anko pointed out curiously. "Did you light a bag of dog shit on fire and put it on his doorstep or something? I've made _lots_ of friends angry by doing that!" she grinned proudly at her display of genius and cunning.

"That was you?!" one of Anko's friends sitting around the table exclaimed angrily. "I got burnt dog shit all over my shoes and between my toes because of that!"

Anko giggled maniacally while Yugao rolled her eyes in annoyance. "No I did not light a bag of dog shit on fire!" she snapped irritably. "And if you don't mind, I'd rather not talk about it. Can we just forget about it for now and have a good time tonight, please?"

"Fine by me," Anko shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't really care. I just wanted to make sure he was on the market. Have you _seen_ him lately?" Anko asked the woman with a perverted leer.

"Anko! He's just turned eighteen for crying out loud!" Yugao said in a scandalised tone.

"Good, that's how I like my men – young, and full of energy!" Anko exclaimed proudly with a drunken giggle. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna finish off these drinks, find my young boy-toy, and fuck the _shit_ out of him!"

A loud crash halted any angry protests Naruto's former team-mate had forthcoming. The occupants of the table all swivelled around in the direction of the disturbance only to find an empty, knocked over barstool, an unfinished bottle of sake and a quickly dissipating cloud of smoke.

"I wonder what that was," Anko wondered curiously, before chugging down the rest of her drink and skipping out of the bar with a gleeful expression on her face.

"You know, she doesn't really help her public image any by going around and doing things like that," Hayate mused before taking another sip of his beer.

"Anko doesn't care if people think she's crazy," Yugao replied nonchalantly. "She only hates it when people think that before getting to know her."

"Wait," Hayate frowned. "She only hates it when people call her crazy _before_ experiencing something to make them think as such?"

"Pretty much," Yugao giggled before sighing. "Her friends are allowed to call her crazy without repercussions. If you call her it without knowing her though . . ."

"She'll slice your genitals off?" Hayate offered with a chuckle. "You know, I've actually seen her do that once to a prisoner we were interrogating once from the Hidden Cloud; does that mean I'm allowed to call her crazy?"

"You want to risk it?" Yugao asked with a raised brow.

Hayate shook his head in the negative before taking another sip of his drink, an uncontrollable shiver running down his spine as his thoughts travelled to more . . . unpleasant places.

Despite the generally joyous atmosphere surrounding her, Yugao couldn't seem to get into the festivities like she normally would in such a situation. No matter how much she tried to ignore it, her thoughts were filled with memories of happier times with her old Genin team.

* * *

"Where the hell is he?" Haruno Sakura complained angrily. The pink-haired, green-eyed girl was pacing angrily up and down the bridge where her Genin team normally met their Jounin-sensei. She wore a red dress over tight black shorts and standard blue ninja sandals. They had been told by the man yesterday – when she and her teammates had visited him in the hospital – that they are to meet him at their regular meeting place at six o'clock in the morning.

It was almost midday.

"I swear, if he's as tardy as Kakashi-sensei, I'm going to complain to the Hokage!" she exclaimed, crossing her arms angrily. "Piggy and her team never have to put up with this crap!"

"Will - you - shut - up?" Kazama Hideaki hissed angrily, his patience running out. The boy had short, windswept brown hair and grey eyes. He wore a loose fitting brown top with long sleeves that covered his bracer covered arms, and black pants filled with pouches, pockets and scroll holsters. His feet were covered in black ninja sandals and his ankles were tied with bandages.

Standing up and dusting his pants off, he glared angrily at Sakura. The girl had been ranting non-stop for almost two hours, enough was enough. Composing himself after his small outburst, he said, "If you must continue complaining, do so behind that abnormally large forehead of yours; I'm sick of your voice."

Sakura stopped dead in her tracks before slowly turning to the brown haired boy with a maniacal glint in her eyes. "Care to repeat that?"

"You heard me," Hideaki declared angrily, not intimidated by the slowly approaching girl in the slightest. "Now go over to the other side of the bridge and be silent before you do something you'll surely regret."

"Moron! I'll kick your ass!" Sakura shrieked angrily as she charged her teammate with fury in her eyes.

"Enough!" the third member of team seven announced sternly, his eyes flashing red briefly as he paused in his current exercises. He had spiky black hair with long bangs that framed the sides of his face and similarly coloured eyes. He wore a blue, loose-collared turtle neck shirt with the Uchiha Clan symbol imprinted on the back, beige coloured shorts and dark blue ninja sandals. "Why don't you both make yourselves useful and train while we wait?"

"Of course Sasuke, you're right!" Sakura admitted brightly, her anger completely forgotten. Hideaki scoffed and looked the other way. "Do you need some more pointers on the tree-climbing exercise? It looks like you're using more chakra than necessary . . ."

"I _don't_ need your help." Sasuke hissed angrily before returning to the task at hand. Secretly, he too was annoyed that he was stuck with another tardy sensei. Kakashi at least limited his tardiness to around three hours; this guy was almost six hours late!

"She's right, you know," a new, unfamiliar voice sounded from right behind Sakura catching the three unsuspecting Genin by surprise – they hadn't even heard him enter the clearing.

The pink haired girl shrieked loudly, not expecting a voice other than Sasuke's or Hideaki's to be heard in such a close proximity, especially not directly behind her.

Spinning around, she was surprised to see a handsome young man with golden blonde hair yawning sleepily while eyeing Sasuke's exercises with a lazy eye.

"Who are you?" Hideaki asked, approaching the newly arrived man warily, a Jounin, judging by his dark green tactical vest. He had a fairly good idea who he was, or rather, what he was doing here, but it never hurt to ask.

"That depends," the man answered cheekily. "Who're you?"

"My name is Hideaki," the brown haired boy answered stiffly. The young man was amused at the kid not using his surname. "Genin of Team Seven."

"Well, I'm Naruto," the young man greeted with a grin while casually dipping his head back to swallow some pills he had tipped out of a small container. Sakura and Hideaki tried to see what it said on the label, but Naruto's hand surreptitiously covered it. "Temporary Sensei of Team Seven."


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

"You."

Naruto peered curiously up at the raven-haired teen addressing him. He was standing upside down on a branch, his arms crossed, while using his Chakra to stick to the tree; an impressive feat for a fresh-out-of-the-academy Genin.

As Sakura had said earlier though, he was still using too much Chakra. To truly master the exercise, he will have to be able to do it with as little Chakra as humanly possible – which, coincidently, is the point of the whole exercise.

Refining one's control over their Chakra to a point where they learn to waste as little as possible when using Ninja techniques.

"Me?" Naruto asked curiously, before realisation dawned on him. He pointed at Sasuke and elaborated in a voice that made him sound very much like a Neanderthal, "Me, Uzumaki Naruto. You, Uchiha Sasuke."

Sasuke ignored him. Dropping to the ground with a graceful flip, he approached the curious blonde man with a scrutinizing glare. Well, Naruto assumed he was being scrutinized. Either that, or that was just how Sasuke's face naturally looked. "I know you."

"Yes," Naruto nodded, patting him on the head as if Sasuke were a toddler. "I know you too."

Slapping his hand away with a scowl, Sasuke elaborated. "You're the ANBU that's always visiting my house. I recognize your voice."

"You're an ANBU?" Hideaki asked with shock. "What the hell? You're barely older than us!"

Naruto ignored Hideaki and eyed Sasuke curiously, surprised that he didn't remember him. Naruto obviously never hung around the Uchiha compound often when younger, but Sasuke often tagged along with Itachi to training when they were still on a Genin team. It may have been a long time ago, but Naruto liked to think of himself as unforgettable. "You recognise my voice, you say?"

"You're there all the time," Sasuke said darkly. "You're always there, bothering my mother, why is that? Wasn't what happened five years ago _enough_?"

"Wow," Naruto chuckled, shaking his head in amusement. "Just when I was about to tell you how impressed I was by your keen observational skills, you put your foot in your mouth and prove that you really _are_ just an idiot Genin."

Ignoring the boy's livid expression, he pointed at Sakura and Hideaki.

"Just like those two," the Jounin dryly stated, much to the shock of the two mentioned Genin. Sakura looked ready to blow a gasket, such was the intensity of the vein throbbing in her forehead. Hideaki, on the other hand, had his grey eyes narrowed angrily, but said nothing to refute his new Sensei and protector.

"You want to know _why_ I'm always over at your house speaking with your mother?" Naruto asked the Uchiha rhetorically, before motioning Hideaki and Sakura over and taking a seat on the grass. "Come, you two, I have something cool to show you."

Despite her anger at the blonde Jounin, Sakura couldn't help being curious about what their new sensei wanted to show them. Hideaki, on the other hand, hesitated, and remained standing.

"This isn't a test," Naruto informed the Fire Lord's son. "If I had the option of failing you in some way, shape or form, I'd send you all back to the Academy just so I wouldn't have to deal with you." Naruto used two of his fingers to point at Sasuke and Hideaki, "Suffice it to say, that's not an option, if you know what I mean."

This statement, while calming Sasuke and assuring the arrogant Uchiha of his political dominance over the regular human being, only seemed to anger Hideaki further

"Are you gonna come and look?" Naruto asked Hideaki impatiently, removing a small booklet from his pocket. "Trust me, what I'm about to show you will change how you look at little Sasuke over there for the rest of your life."

Naruto grinned when Hideaki, albeit reluctantly, made his way over to Sakura and he. The girl sat on her knees beside him while the still mistrustful Hideaki stood at his rear, peering over his shoulder at what Naruto had in his hands. The boy seemed dubious about whether the small booklet could do what the blonde claimed it could.

Opening to the first page, Sakura and Hideaki frowned in confusion when they saw a picture of a beautiful woman carrying a basket of flowers and smiling serenely at the photographer. She wore a casual, yet pretty summer dress while tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"Gorgeous, right?" Naruto asked, smirking knowingly at Sakura's envious look and Hideaki's annoyed one.

"You're a pervert too?" Hideaki asked incredulously. "First we get stuck with a moron who reads porn in public, and now this?!"

"Are you denying her beauty?" Naruto asked in a dangerously calm and eerie tone, his head tilted downwards and to the side so that his fringe cast an ominous shadow over his eyes as he addressed the boy.

The three Genin in the clearing collectively shivered at the tone of his voice.

"C-creepy," Sakura muttered with another barely suppressed shiver.

"N-no, it's not t-that," Hideaki replied, his bravado from earlier having disappeared. "I just don't s-see the point of t-this."

"Oh, well that's okay." Naruto answered brightly, his mood having made a complete one-eighty. "Let me finish showing you these pictures before you say anything – anyway, I call this one 'Happy while shopping Mikoto'."

Sasuke's eyes widened in disbelief as he started to understand what exactly it was Naruto was showing his two teammates.

Flipping the page in his book, Sakura stifled a chuckle while Hideaki raised an amused brow.

"You'd think I wouldn't like this one, but it brings me such fond memories," Naruto narrated with a content sigh. The woman, now snarling angrily, was dressed in a pink, fluffy bathrobe while brandishing a large frying pan and seemingly chasing the photographer around her living room. The picture seemed hurriedly taken, but it still captured her long, wet hair framing the same beautiful face. "I call this one 'Mikoto pissed because I walked in on her in the shower and_ almost_ saw her naked'."

Naruto sighed dreamily, recalling the mental image and the glorious amount of 'side-boob' he'd seen. The kids looked at him warily when a blush adored his features and a perverted giggle slipped out.

Sasuke, at this point, had his eyed narrowed dangerously and begun to make his way over to the group.

"If you finally don't understand why I always go over to the Uchiha's house, I think this one should make it crystal clear," Naruto exclaimed as he turned towards the back of the booklet. His grin widened at Sakura's envious gasp and Hideaki's coloured cheeks.

This time, the woman in the photo was only wearing a simple black string bikini, and a wide brimmed summer hat protecting her from the harsh Konoha Sun.

She was not alone in the photo.

Naruto stood beside her in a pair of swimming trunks, an arm wrapped around her shoulder with a large grin directed at the camera. The woman, Mikoto obviously, had her arms wrapped around his torso for the photo. She was in the process of planting a sloppy kiss on his whisker-scarred cheek.

"Her skin is so perfect," Sakura noticed in a depressed tone, bemoaning her obviously 'less-than-perfect' skin. Naruto couldn't blame her, not many could compare with the goddess in the photo. "She's got a perfect body too, and look at those thighs!" she moaned in despair, "the world's _so _not fair."

"What do you think Hideaki?" Naruto asked smugly. "Amazing, right?"

"You have a hot girlfriend, so what?" Hideaki asked, trying to hide his embarrassment. "I don't see what this has to do with the Uchiha."

At the mention of 'girlfriend', Sasuke's glare turned absolutely murderous.

"Oh, my stupid little friend," Naruto sighed dramatically. Yanking Hideaki down beside him on the ground, Naruto was easily able to overcome the embarrassed boy's futile struggles before throwing a friendly arm over his shoulder. "This isn't my girlfriend, as much as it saddens me to admit. This," he motioned to the picture, "is Uchiha Mikoto, otherwise known as Sasuke's mum."

Both Sakura's and Hideaki's heads snapped in Sasuke's direction instantly. Despite the fact that they'd been going to the Academy together for years, they had never actually _seen_ Sasuke's mother. Hideaki, much to Sasuke's annoyance, couldn't help giving the raven-haired teen a somewhat respectful look.

"I call this one 'A day by the lake'," Naruto announced, drawing the three teens' attention once more. "You see, about two months ago, on Mikoto's birthday, she was sitting at home, bored out of her mind and preparing lunch for her bastard of a son when I whisked her away for a day by the lake."

"I was busy with training," Sasuke replied to the incredulous and disbelieving stares of his teammates curtly, no trace of defensiveness in his tone whatsoever. "I didn't have time for foolish things such as birthday parties."

"Busy with training?" Naruto asked in amusement. "Must be difficult to give her a kiss and tell her you love her on the way out of the house, right? Those three hours you waited for Kakashi picking your nose must have been pretty important, I imagine."

"I can't believe that's your mother," Hideaki exclaimed. Taking advantage of everyone's diverted attention to spy the photo once again. "And you, you got her to kiss you!"

"I know," Naruto said, sounding immensely pleased with himself. "I'm awesome."

"Enough!" Sasuke shouted sternly, the talk of his mother getting on his nerves. "You, stop looking at that picture!" He exclaimed angrily, pointing at Hideaki. "And you, why were you late?"

"My, my Sasuke, so demanding," Naruto chided. "But if you must know, I had a late night."

"What kind of excuse is that?!" Sakura shrieked angrily, having seemingly forgotten all about the pictures.

"Well, if you _must_ know," Naruto began with a sigh, "I spent the majority of my evening running from a beautiful woman who would _not_ stop chasing me until she had her wicked way with me. Fortunately, or unfortunately for me, depending on how you look at it, she passed out before she had the opportunity to do so. Then, I had to spend the rest of my night carrying her around town until I actually found her home . . . took hours, I tell you."

Silence met his proclamation, each of the Genin looking at him with different degrees of shock until Sakura finally voiced her opinion.

"Liar!"

Naruto let out a deep, depressed sigh. Why did he agree to do this again? Oh right, he didn't.

"Whatever," he said with a shake of his head. "It doesn't matter, now you know why I'm always over at Sasuke's house. It definitely helps with my assassinations," he added, with a chuckle.

His nonchalant answer was met with three equally perplexed and blank stares.

"What the hell?" Hideaki exclaimed first, breaking the silence. "How does spending time with the asshole's hot mum help you kill people?"

"Kill people?" Naruto asked with genuine surprise. "You mean to tell me you've never heard of the term 'Assassinating' before? What do they teach kids in the Academy these days, honestly?"

"I think it's obvious that we have no idea what you're talking about!" Sakura replied crossly. Being the smartest ninja in her graduating class, she valued her intelligence above all else. To be told she didn't know something was not only an insult to her intelligence, but also an insult to her pride. "And I very much doubt that you're talking about murdering people by means of a surprise attack, or for Political reasons!"

Naruto blinked owlishly at the pink-haired girl, wondering if she'd just recited the literal definition of the term to try and impress him before shaking his head and grinning slyly at the teenagers. "There's no Political reasons behind my assassinations, that would be hilarious though," he mused with a chuckle. "To assassinate, or rather, killing off my 'morning problems' and making sure to get rid of the evidence," a large grin spread across his face, however it faltered when he noticed the teens' blank stares. "Ah, you're right, it's a pretty stupid joke. Guess you had to be there . . . "

Sasuke, taking only a few moments to understand what Naruto was talking about, begun to tremble with barely suppressed rage. His fists were clenched so tightly that his knuckles were turning white. His once onyx eyes also flashed red before he dipped his head down and glared ferociously at the ground.

Hideaki, picking up on the crude terminology almost instantly, covered his mouth with his hand and snorted in amusement. The snort turned into quiet snickers, which then turned into loud chuckles before finally evolving into full-blown, bellyaching laughter.

Sakura still had no idea what he was talking about.

"Bastard!" Sasuke roared before whipping out a kunai from his pouch and charging Naruto, fury written all over his features.

What happened next was almost a blur to the three Genin.

Before Sasuke could even make half the distance towards Naruto, something had knocked him hard on the back of the neck and sent him crashing towards the ground. Quickly trying to regain his footing, he found that he couldn't move due to a heavy weight pushing down on his back, pinning him to the unforgiving earth.

Sakura and Hideaki stared in disbelief at the scene before them. Naruto was sitting atop of Sasuke. The boy's arms were pinned behind his back by a smiling Naruto who didn't look like he was going to let go any time soon.

Hideaki, still in a state of disbelief, gazed to his left where Naruto was still holding him in place with an arm around his shoulder.

"Shadow Clone . . ." Sakura exclaimed in awe, ignoring her crush's predicament for the moment. Seeing Hideaki's confused glance, she elaborated. "The Shadow Clone Jutsu is a ninja technique which makes a physical replica of the user out of their Chakra. Unlike the regular Clone technique where the copy is only an illusion, this one uses much more Chakra to give the clone a physical presence – it's a forbidden technique because the user must have an extremely large Chakra capacity to use it."

Hideaki looked to his new Sensei – the one by his side – with awe after Sakura's explanation. At first, he didn't think much of the young Jounin, but after such a display of speed and power, it was hard not to. Hideaki hadn't even seen Naruto use hand seals to mould the Chakra needed for the technique, which means one of two things: Naruto had made the clone before approaching them in the clearing, or he was just that good.

Hideaki wasn't quite sure of the answer quite yet.

Sakura, having finally realised that Naruto had no intention of getting up off the struggling Uchiha, finally snapped out of her awestruck state. "Hey, get off Sasuke! You're hurting him!"

Both Narutos ignored her completely; the one atop of Sasuke used his free hand to muffle a yawn while the one beside the other two Genin stared directly into the struggling boy's eyes. Where his irises were once a plain onyx, they were now a blazing crimson. Small black tomoe surrounded each pupil, two in each eye that randomly and rapidly spun around said pupils.

This was the Uchiha's famous and revered bloodline ability, the doujutsu known as the Sharingan. Its abilities earned the virtually extinct clan notoriety and scorn all across the Elemental Nations.

"You know," the Naruto beside Hideaki spoke in a conversational tone. "Your brother had a fully matured Sharingan by the time he was eight. I'm not impressed."

At the mere mention of his brother's name, Sasuke's struggles increased tenfold, such was his fury. His struggles, however, proved pointless. The clone sitting on his back may as well have been a one tonne boulder, for all the good it would have done him.

"Rule number one," the Naruto sitting beside Hideaki and Sakura spoke, gaining the Genins' attention. "Never, _ever_ charge into a fight in anger or without a plan. A ninja must keep a level head at _all_ times. Doing so in the field can not only get you killed, but your teammates as well."

The clone sitting on Sasuke's back disappeared in a puff of smoke, freeing Sasuke from his captive position.

"That's just one of the many rules I'll give you while we're together," Naruto explained. "If you break them . . ." Naruto trailed off, dipping his head forward so that his fringe cast an ominous shadow over his face before continuing in an eerily calm and deadly voice. "_I'll_ break _you_."

The Genin felt a collective shiver run down their spines at the tone of Naruto's voice.

'_This guy . . .'_ Hideaki thought warily.

'_How can he be so cheerful at one time, and then so creepy the next?'_ Sakura mused to herself as the bright smile returned to Naruto's features. _'This guy's creepier than Kakashi-sensei when he's reading his porn . . .'_

Sasuke said nothing. The Sharingan in his eyes faded, returning them to their original blank onyx.

"Let's get one thing clear," Naruto spoke up once more. He motioned to the forehead protectors with the metallic, leaf engraved plates that signified the Genin as Konoha ninja before continuing, "I don't care if you have forehead protectors or not. Just by looking at you I can tell you're all just a bunch of idiots that have no idea what it means to be a ninja. However," he continued, despite the glare he was receiving from all three, "I'm getting paid a shit load of money to make sure you can pass as capable ninjas sometime in the near future, and I intend to deliver, despite how hopeless the situation looks."

Naruto could tell that every word he spoke only served to anger the three Genin further, just as intended. He never had it easy as a Genin. Shit, he never had anything easy in his _life_. For these _kids_ to expect otherwise was insulting.

"You're all dismissed," he waved them off and started to walk away. "Meet me here tomorrow at noon for your training."

"Noon?!" Sakura exclaimed loudly, shocked at how late they'd begin their team training. "Why the _hell_ are we meeting so late?"

"I like to sleep in!" Naruto called out to them from over his shoulder before disappearing from the clearing in a swirl on leaves.

Sasuke, Sakura and Hideaki stared at the spot their new sensei had just disappeared from with varying emotions. Finally, Hideaki said, "At least he's honest about it, and told us he'd be late."

"Hn," Sasuke shrugged before turning around and charging at the tree he was exercising on earlier. The boy seemed to be venting his anger at the helpless tree as he continued his Chakra Control exercises.

"I don't know who's worse; Kakashi-sensei, or this 'Naruto'," Sakura exclaimed sourly before using her excellent Chakra control to easily stick to and scale the tree beside Sasuke's to watch him train.

"Uzumaki Naruto, eh?" Hideaki mused quietly, narrowing his eyes at a large tree – larger than the one Sasuke was scaling – on the other side of the clearing. "I'll show you who's an idiot."

* * *

"Is that you Naruto?!" the woman exclaimed incredulously as the grinning blonde Jounin in question plopped down on one of the stools at his favourite Ramen stand in town.

"In the flesh," he greeted before shouting into the back of the store, "Yo, old man, I'll take three beefs, make it snappy!"

"I'm on my break you ungrateful brat!" the voice hollered back with annoyance. "The gorgeous girl minding the store is there for more than just looks!"

"The gorgeous girl is otherwise occupied!" Naruto winked at the woman in question who was currently busying herself with scrubbing down the bench with a clean rag. "I know you're always tired in your old age, but you're still on the clock! Make me my Ramen!"

"You'll get old one day," the old, balding man in chef's clothing warned with a shake of his fist as he came out from the kitchen. "And when you do, I'll be laughing at your ass from heaven!"

"Well seeing as Naruto isn't getting old anytime soon, and you're not dying anytime soon either, go and make his Ramen," the pretty, brown-haired woman ordered her father, ushering him back into the kitchen.

"What happened to the youth respecting their elders these days?" the Ramen chef grumbled, mostly to himself, as he tied an apron around his waist and headed back into the kitchen. "No respect, I tell you."

Rolling her eyes, the woman leaned over the counter and planted a chaste kiss on Naruto's scarred cheek. "It's good to see your face after so long!" she gushed excitedly. "It seems like years since I've last seen it!"

"It probably has been," Naruto agreed with a smile.

"And you look so _handsome_ now," she exclaimed while busying herself with trying to flatten out his otherwise untameable hair.

"What do you mean I look handsome _now_?" Naruto plastered a look of fake hurt on his face and held his heart in mock pain, "You wound me, I don't," he sniffed loudly and wiped a fake tear from his eye, "I don't think we can be friends anymore! You're too mean!"

"Oh you know what I mean, you idiot," the girl said with a roll of her eyes and a scuff to the back of his head. "Before you had the mysterious thing working for you, what, with that sexy uniform and the mask you wore all the time? Now though? Well, without the mask, you're quite handsome!"

"Oh, all right," his fake sniffing quickly ceased, only to be replaced by a huge grin. "You're forgiven, we can be friends again," Naruto relented with an over dramatic sigh. "Oh darn, look, now I'm blushing!"

The girl chuckled at his antics despite herself, she could always count on him showing up for lunch and otherwise brightening up her boring days working at the Ramen stand.

Naruto took the moment of comfortable silence to yell into the back of the store once again, "Hurry up ya geezer, I'm starving out here!"

The old chef's muffled voice thundered from within the kitchen, "You can't rush art you impudent brat!"

"Bah, this guy," Naruto shook his head before smiling at the girl again. "So, how's things Ayame?"

"Ah, you know, working, trying to learn everything my dad has to teach me," she explained nonchalantly. "Enough about me, what about you though? Doesn't that vest mean you're a Jounin level ninja now? When did that happen?"

"Ah, a long time ago actually." Naruto shrugged uncaringly. "I just got reassigned from my old job to a new one, a Jounin sensei actually."

While it was no secret to Ayame that Naruto used to work for the super secret ANBU organisation, it wasn't exactly a commonly talked about thing amongst the citizens of Konoha. The ANBU worked from the shadows and wore masks for a reason, to keep their identities a secret.

The only reason she knew that Naruto was a commander within the organisation was due to the frequent visits he still made between missions and work. While eating at your favourite restaurant in uniform wasn't exactly protocol for ANBU, it's not like he had time to change, so nobody really said anything.

ANBU commander, Chunin, Genin, it didn't matter. Naruto always came every day – unless he was out of the village – for lunch. That was something that never changed, and also something Ayame frequently looked forward to.

If there was one thing that you could always count on with Naruto, it was his near-addiction to the tasty fried noodles.

"They gave you responsibility over three children?" Ayame asked dubiously, an amused smirk showing her amusement. "What _has_ the world come to?"

"That's what I said!" Naruto agreed with her. "I figure if I beat the crap out of them enough, and show them enough porn, that they'll realise I'm an irresponsible sensei and have me removed."

"You don't need to try anything overt like that for them to realise you're irresponsible, Naruto," Ayame replied dryly.

"Ouch!" Naruto exclaimed in mock hurt with his hands over his heart. "Heart punch, Ayame!"

Ayame grinned at Naruto's reaction as her father reappeared from the kitchen with a tray holding three bowls of Beef Ramen. Placing the bowls in front of the Jounin, waving off his words of thanks, Ayame and her father both watched, bemused, as Naruto virtually inhaled the contents of each bowl as if it would run away if he didn't quickly devour their contents. Ayame often likened placing Ramen in front of Naruto to placing fresh meat in front of a starving tiger.

It didn't last very long.

"Ah, that was awesome!" Naruto exclaimed, patting his bloated stomach in satisfaction. "Thanks Teuchi, you can go back to sleep now, the cool kids are gonna talk now."

Teuchi rolled his eyes and said before disappearing into the back of the shop, "Meal's on the house, congratulations on becoming a Jounin sensei and all that crap."

"Hah, love you too gramps!" Naruto called after the grumbling old man.

"Want a drink?" Ayame offered as Naruto cleaned his teeth out with a toothpick.

"Yeah, get me a fruit juice," Naruto requested, eyeing the humming Ramen waitress speculatively. The Ramen stand was always empty at this time of day, being right in between the lunch and dinner rushes.

It was Naruto's favourite time of day to visit.

"So," Naruto began, breaking Ayame out of her reverie. "Are you gonna tell me why you're so happy today, or am I gonna have to weasel it out of you?"

"What are you talking about?" Ayame asked with a hitch to her voice. "I'm always happy, since when do I need a reason?"

Naruto just stared at her, not deeming her question worthy of response.

Sighing, the Ramen waitress relented and spoke in a hushed voice so that her father wouldn't overhear. "I'm going on a date tonight."

The unexpected admission had the Jounin's fruit juice travelling down the wrong pipe and coughing uncontrollably. Finally, getting himself under control, he was able to ask, "Excuse me?"

Ayame frowned, "You heard what I said."

Regaining his composure, Naruto straightened and scrutinized the woman for several moments with a penetrating gaze before asking, "Name?"

"Akira." Ayame answered with a light blush. "Yoshida Akira."

"And where does this 'Akira' live?" Naruto asked curiously.

Speaking before thinking, Ayame answered. "Akira actually lives in the apartment complex next to yours . . . Naruto! Hey, where are you going?!"

Seeing Naruto vanish around the corner of the dusty street, she let out an annoyed sigh.

"This won't end well."

* * *

The girl quickly rushed to her front door, a silk bathrobe wrapped snugly around her impressive figure while her sandy-blonde hair still dripped water all over her carpet. She was taking a nice, long shower when somebody knocked on her door, and interrupted her bathing.

"One moment please!" She called through the locked door as she peered through the peephole. Seeing that it was a ninja, she quickly unlocked the door and stepped back to open it, her cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

"Can I help you?" she asked as the ninja quickly looked passed her into the apartment, ignoring her completely. Quickly getting annoyed, despite the man's position, she asked again in a much more forceful tone, "I said _can I help you_?"

Naruto eyed the woman who had obviously just stepped out of the shower speculatively before pushing passed her and heading right into her apartment uninvited.

Now, the attractive woman understood that, in a ninja village, ninja are to be respected above all others. However, that definitely didn't mean she'd stand for some stranger barging into her apartment without invitation. Her fury only increased tenfold when, as she tried to follow his quick strides, she saw him storming out of her bedroom and head towards the bathroom.

"What the hell are you doing?!" she shouted angrily, grabbing his arm and stopping him from entering the bathroom and embarrassing her to death. Being a woman with a healthy sexual appetite, and having the house to herself, she had several things out in the open in the bathroom that she was in the process of using during her shower that she _definitely _didn't want some stranger seeing.

"Where is he?" Naruto asked with a menacing tone, narrowing his eyes at her and shrugging off her arm.

"Where's _who_?" the woman asked desperately, her fury having quickly morphed into fear at the menacing tone in the man's voice.

"Akira, where's Akira?" he asked again in a no-nonsense tone. "And don't even think about lying to me _girl_," he threatened the confused girl.

"Um . . . " She stepped back warily, not sure what to make of the situation. "I don't know who you're looking for exactly, but my name _is_ Akira . . . Yoshida Akira . . ."

The anger on the ninja's face vanished in an instant, only to be replaced by mute shock. Akira seemed to be just as confused and shocked as Naruto, as neither spoke for several moments.

"_You're_ Akira?" Naruto asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah," Akira answered slowly, drawing the word out warily.

"Yoshida Akira? You're name is _Yoshida_ Akira?" he asked again, his disbelief growing by the instant apparently.

"Yes," Akira answered curtly this time, quickly getting annoyed.

"You're a girl," Naruto pointed out needlessly.

"Well spotted," she snapped irritably. "You must be a credit to the ninja force! Now can you please tell me what the _hell_ you're doing in my apartment?!"

His eyes wide and his mouth hanging open, he slowly, warily locked eyes with her again and asked, "You wouldn't happen to be going on a date with a certain Ichiraku Ayame tonight, would you?"

Surprised, and not seeing how that was any of his business, she narrowed her eyes at him. "Unless this is a matter involving the security of the village, I don't see why I should answer that question."

"Oh, wow!" Naruto chuckled nervously. "Well, this is awkward . . ."

"What?" Now it was Akira's turn to be confused. "What the hell are you talking about? And more importantly, _what the hell is going on here?!"_

Naruto chuckled again and scratched the back of his head nervously. "Well, you're Yoshida Akira, a girl, who is going on a date with my friend, Ichiraku Ayame, who, until roughly one minute ago, I was certain was straight."

Akira looked at Naruto incredulously before bursting out in laughter. "Oh, this is too much!" she exclaimed between giggles. "Let me get this straight, you, the big scary ninja, came here, expecting me to be a man, ready to give me the 'you hurt her I'll kill you' talk, without even knowing your friend was a lesbian!"

Naruto slumped against the wall and slid down to the ground, his mouth open and ready to object before he wisely shut it and smirked. "Yeah, something like that. When I saw you answer the door like that, I guess I just assumed that _mister_ Akira had another girl on the side. I guess I got a little angry."

"She means a lot to you, huh?" Akira asked gently, sliding down beside Naruto on the floor. "I guess that's kind of sweet of you, in a weird sort of way."

Naruto nodded, using the few moments of comfortable silence to eye the woman sitting beside him. If nothing else, Ayame definitely had taste. Akira, judging by the way her robe hugged her figure, had a curvy, well-proportioned body. She had a cute face framed by sandy blonde hair with sharp, green eyes. Her legs were long, and sexy while her bum, from what he could see, was nice and shapely.

"Are you done checking me out?" Akira asked in amusement as Naruto chuckled.

"If nothing else, I must say that Ayame has taste," Naruto admitted with a charming smile.

"Oh, wow, are you hitting on me?" Akira asked in amusement. Earning an eye-roll from the only ninja in the room. "I don't even know your name."

"Don't worry," Naruto assured with a cocky grin. "If Uzumaki Naruto started hitting on you, I'd have you straight again in no time at all!"

"Is that right?" Akira asked dryly. "So, is 'Uzumaki Naruto' going say what you came here to say?"

"Yeah, been thinking how to word that to be honest." Naruto chuckled in embarassment. "I'm not gonna lie and tell you I wasn't blindsided by all this."

"Why don't you try your best?" Akira urged him. "I'd like to get back to my shower, if you don't mind."

Naruto chuckled again, a nervous habbit, but nodded. "Fair enough." He paused. "Before you penetrate Ayame with some penis-shaped toy, you better mean it, or I'll be back to kick your pretty, and shapely ass! I'll have none of this promiscuous nonsense with Ayame, you'd better not break her heart!"

Akira was gaping at Naruto with an embarrassed flush and opened mouth shock. She hadn't expected him to be so . . . blunt! She'd have probably laughed had it been said to anyone else, but as things were, she was just too embarrassed to do anything.

"Oh, a shy one, that's kind of cute." Naruto nodded sagely. "So, now that we have all of that nastiness out of the way, can you promise me to video-tape you two going at it if things go that far? I need it for –!"

"Out!" Akira ordered while trying to hide a small grin.

"Well, can I at least see what you were so desperate to hide form me in the bathroom -?"

"I said out!" she got up and started shoving him out of the apartment.

"You know," Naruto said as he let himself be shoved out of the apartment. "You're kind of pushy, are you like that in bed too? You know what? Forget the tape, let me watch! I promise I won't try to join in -!"

"Out, out, _out_!" she exclaimed with a laugh. "You can rest assured that I am suitably cowed, and, after this display, positively certain of my sexual orientation. Now, it was nice meeting you, _goodbye!"_

Naruto stood in silence on Akira's doorstep for several moments, the door having slammed shut behind him, the sound echoing loudly in the otherwise silent corridor. "Well, that was interesting," he mused humorously.

He leapt onto the railing of the nearby balcony and used his Chakra to help him swiftly jump to a nearby roof.

Being a Jounin sensei may not be so bad after all. He was definitely having much more fun already.

Reaching into his pouch, he pulled out his medication and swallowed two tablets before deciding that it'd probably be best to lay-low for a while. Ayame, bless her soul, had one hell of a temper.

She'd probably poison his Ramen if she heard about the stunt he'd just pulled. It looked like he'd have to rely on the instant variety for at least a week before Ayame would calm down enough to at least not try and kill him.

He expertly leapt off the edge of the building and jumped through one of the large windows in his apartment and broke his fall with a roll. Springing up, he grabbed the small watering can nearby and silently began to tend to his plants before letting out a tired sigh.

How in the hell was he supposed to _teach_ a group of Genin when everything he'd ever learned was mostly self-taught?


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Evenings in Konoha were the Third's favourite time of the day. The heat that was so synonymous with the Land of Fire leaves with the Sun and is replaced by a cool breeze and a beautiful cloudless star-filled sky.

He had been to many places, seen many things, across the Elemental countries, but few could compare to the beauty that Konoha seemed to exude from every corner of the village. He loved Konoha with all his might, and that is what being Hokage was all about.

However, what the Hokage _does_, is a slightly different matter.

"Unusual movements, you say?" Sarutobi asked in a grave tone. His rough voice, though barely above a whisper, seemed to easily pierce through the silence of the spacious Hokage's office.

Leaning against the side of Sarutobi's desk, arms crossed, and gazing absently out one of the empty windows was a large man with thick red straight-line tattoos running down each cheek from just below his eyes. His white hair was long, spiky and held in a ponytail that trailed down his back to below his waist.

The man wore a ninja mesh shirt beneath loose-fitting grey clothes, forearm guards and a red sleeveless Haori. His long hair was kept away from his face with a peculiar forehead protector, and not one with the insignia of Konoha imprinted on it – though a Konoha ninja he most certainly was. This forehead protector was almost horned in design and had the Kanji for 'Oil' imprinted on it for all to see. He completed his look with a pair of geta sandals; an odd choice for any ninja, as they make being stealthy quite difficult.

Also, crouching at one of the empty windows and partaking in the conversation was the still recovering Hatake Kakashi. After his escape to the bar with Naruto a week ago, he'd been forcibly hauled back to the Hospital to finish out the remainder of his stay. His arm was now heavily wrapped and held to his torso with bandages while he chose to forego his Jounin flack jacket and forehead protector. His right eye was wide and alert, while his left was closed and scarred.

"I've noticed a few unusual things myself," Kakashi contributed dutifully as he waited for the Hokage to reply.

"What do you consider more unusual than normal for Orochimaru, Jiraiya?" The Hokage asked his ex-student curiously before taking a puff of his pipe. The man in question let out a tired sigh before answering, his attention still seemingly on the horizon.

"Twelve years of tracking down that Snake, and I may as well have been chasing shadows," Jiraiya admitted quietly. "It didn't matter how solid my informants were – you just won't find anything if there's no information to be had. Orochimaru played everything very close to his chest, and, I can only assume, lived under a rock to avoid detection for over a decade. There is no other way he could have avoided being seen for such an obscene amount of time . . ."

"Especially given the kind of . . . _person_ . . . we know Orochimaru to be," the Third added darkly, earning a mirthless chuckle from the large man.

"You got that right old man," Jiraiya agreed darkly as Kakashi observed silently, not having the same history with the dangerous Missing-nin that these two obviously had. "If there's one thing we can be certain of about our old friend, it's that when he puts his mind to something, nothing can or would normally dare to stand in his way."

The Third hummed thoughtfully before tipping some ash from his pipe, "Is that so?" he asked with the faintest hint of a grin from beneath the shadows of his wide brimmed hat.

Jiraiya rolled his eyes in annoyance, "I think we can both agree that _he's_ a special case."

Kakashi coughed into his hand to remind the two elder men that he was in the room, that, and he was slightly annoyed with not knowing what the hell they were talking about.

"Sorry Kakashi," the Hokage placated apologetically. "Please Jiraiya, if you would?"

"Fair enough," Jiraiya stood straight and rounded the desk, taking two small orange books from his vest with a smirk before continuing. "So, after over a decade of nothing other than the fact that he was once a member of the secret organization known as Akatsuki, imagine my surprise when I hear a man matching Orochimaru's description was seen having a secret meeting with none other than the Fourth Kazekage."

"The Kage of the Hidden Village in the Sand?" Sarutobi asked with surprise, and a small blush as Jiraiya dropped one of the orange books in his lap, before handing one to a delighted Kakashi. "And Orochimaru is not the kind of person to leave witnesses, how is it you came to learn of this 'secret meeting'?"

"And more importantly," Kakashi began, tucking away the book Jiraiya had given him for later, "What are Suna, a village who is supposedly Konoha's ally, doing consorting with one of our most hated criminals?"

"A magician never reveals his secrets!" Jiraiya exclaimed with an over exaggerated flourish and a cheesy grin. "Let's just say that my spy network is more extensive than many would believe! In fact, you might just say I have connections in _very_ high places, for I am the man who has no enemies in the North, South, East and West! Not even in the Heavens! I am one of the Legendary Three Ninjas, the white-haired Toad tamer! Even a crying baby would stop and stare in awe . . . at the legendary Jiraiya!"

What Kakashi had just witnessed had to have been one of the most bizarre things he'd ever seen. _This_ was the man who had trained the Fourth Hokage to be one of the most powerful ninja to ever live? _This_ was the man who was known as the legendary Toad Sage? "You know, if you didn't want to tell us who your sources are, you _could_ have just said so . . ."

Jiraiya slumped over pathetically, mumbling to himself grumpily about this generation's lack of respect for their elders.

The Hokage was gripping his pipe so tightly that his knuckles were turning white from the pressure. "Stop fooling around you god damn moron!" A pipe flying across the room to smack Jiraiya in the back of the head accompanied the angry Hokage's outburst.

"Oh shit, that's still _lit_ you stupid old man!" Jiraiya shrieked angrily as he futilely attempted to swipe the burning embers from his hair. "If you burnt my beautiful hair, I'm cancelling your subscription to my 'Make Out Paradise' books!"

Taking a deep breath to calm down, Sarutobi's posture tensed as he eyed Jiraiya once more. "Is that all you have to report?"

The no-nonsense tone used from his old Sensei left no room for arguing or tomfoolery. "Yes and no," Jiraiya answered cryptically, however, he didn't leave it there less he incur the old Hokage's wrath once more. "I just find it an incredible coincidence that at the very same time a mysterious new Hidden Ninja Village comes out onto the scene - one I have _not_ been able to track the location of - Orochimaru is seen meeting with foreign leaders."

"I do not believe in coincidences. Especially when it comes to Orochimaru and this new Sound Village." Sarutobi replied darkly as he relit his pipe.

"Which is what makes you such a great Hokage," Jiraiya replied sincerely and nonchalantly. "Anyway, that's all I have to report on the issue. Do you have anything to add Kakashi?"

Nodding silently as the Hokage's attention was drawn to the younger man in the room, Kakashi stepped off the windowsill and drew himself to his full height as he addressed his village's leader. "As you no doubt both already know, I recently defeated a very powerful Missing-nin who showed the ability to utilize Orochimaru's Cursed Seal to increase his power by an exponential amount."

"Yes, a troubling bit of news, though I am glad you are safe." The Hokage replied warmly before motioning him to continue.

Nodding in thanks, Kakashi did just that. "What you both may _not_ know is that the autopsy on Momochi Zabuza's body has been completed, and, referring to the notes both Jiraiya and Uzumaki Naruto compiled on the Cursed Seal, I can only come to the conclusion that Orochimaru has found a way to make it unique, more powerful, and less damaging to the user."

Silence followed his statement for several moments. Jiraiya looked pensive, his brow furrowed and his lips set in a grim line, while the Hokage looked troubled.

The aged Hokage replied with a single word. "Explain."

Nodding, Kakashi continued. "Though Momochi Zabuza's Curse Seal differs in appearance to Mitarashi Anko's, they both seem to have the same function on the surface."

"What do you mean by 'on the surface'?" Jiraiya asked curiously.

"Tests conducted on Mitarashi Anko's Curse Seal have shown that the effects of having her power drawn out from within her in such a fashion causes a deteriorating effect on her body." Kakashi fought hard to dispel the images the mentioning of Anko's body conjured in his mind – stupid Naruto. "Momochi Zabuza's body showed no such deterioration. In fact, as impossible as it may sound, his body seems to have healed slightly from the injuries that caused his death."

_That_ fact was definitely something the Hokage and the Legendary Ninja didn't see coming.

"Healing _after _death?" Jiraiya asked incredulously, as the Hokage's eyes widened in disbelief, his teeth clenched around his pipe. "How is that even _possible_? If the man is dead, he'd have no Chakra left to power the seal!"

"The Medic-nin that was charged with performing the autopsy wasn't exactly sure, he recommended you study it yourself actually," Kakashi added, motioning to Jiraiya. "But his best guess was that the Curse Seal draws Chakra from the environment to heal minor wounds."

"One of the reasons you no doubt found your battle with the man most difficult, I imagine," the Hokage added, pulling the rim of his hat down over his eyes as he pondered. "Anything else? You mentioned this Curse Seal being more powerful than Anko's?"

"Yes," Kakashi confirmed with a deep breath. "It was . . . terrifying. Had he only remained at his initial level of power increase, I would have been fine, however, as things were, the only reason I am alive today is because I have the Sharingan," Kakashi tapped his closed left eye for effect.

"What do you mean initial _level_ of power?" Jiraiya asked suddenly, piercing the silence of the Hokage's office with his deep voice.

Kakashi was about to answer, but paused briefly to collect his thoughts. That fight with Momochi Zabuza had made him painfully aware of his limits, and that was something he never wanted to be made aware of again.

"When it seemed obvious that his initial power boost would not have been enough to kill me, the Curse Seal on his shoulder . . . changed, and begun to cover his body in more of those purple, flame like markings that are synonymous with the Curse seal," Kakashi began slowly, aware that he had both elder men's undivided attention. "The flames covered his entire body . . . and then . . . he _changed_."

"What do you mean 'change'?" Jiraiya demanded curtly.

"I mean just that, his body _changed_," Kakashi insisted. "I almost want to say that it was a mutation of sorts, but that kind of conclusion should only stated by a professional."

"What kind of _mutation_ are we talking about here?" Jiraiya pressed, eager to find out more about the Curse Seal Naruto and he had studied.

"His skin turned dark brown, his hair white, the whites of his eyes turned red, two large horns sprouted from the sides of temple, and his sword arm increased in size dramatically," Kakashi answered from memory, the image burned into his mind, not able to forget it even if he wanted to.

"'Demon of the Mist' indeed," the Hokage muttered to himself in a troubled tone as Jiraiya scoffed.

"So he looks like a scary monster, I don't see the big deal," Jiraiya exclaimed with a frown, his arms crossed in front of his chest stubbornly.

"If only that were the case," Kakashi sighed wearily. "Strikes I had been able to block and parry before the transformation became devastatingly more powerful, I found that out the hard way," he muttered curtly, motioning to his arm. "And not only that, his speed increased substantially as well. Also, if that weren't enough, all minor wounds I had inflicted on him previously to slow and impair his movement instantly healed after the transformation – needless to say, I was pressed quite hard."

"No disrespect intended, but how did you kill him?" Jiraiya asked curiously. "From what you've described, Zabuza was almost your level before the transformation occurred, the power increase should have been too much for you to handle afterwards."

"It normally would have been, and I take no offence," Kakashi shrugged nonchalantly. "I was at a loss to explain how I survived also, but reviewing the fight in my mind while recovering has given me a new perspective."

"Got bored after finishing my latest book, eh?" Jiraiya asked with a perverted chuckle. Kakashi was just glad that his facemask covered his own flushed cheeks.

"I can only assume that this was the first time Zabuza experienced the Second Level of the Curse Seal's power," Kakashi said, relating his opinion to the two legendary ninja.

"That is the conclusion I, too, have just come to," the Hokage mused sagely. "This Zabuza . . . my guess is that his body was not accustomed to the massive influx of power and was thus induced into a berserker-like rage."

"You can give a mediocre ninja as much power as he wants," Jiraiya began, after a moment's silence. "But if he doesn't use his head, he's just a rabid dog that needs to be put down."

Kakashi nodded his ascent. "He seemed to forget several of my Sharingan's abilities, and I capitalized on that."

The three legendary ninja lapsed into silence as they processed the new information given to them. Kakashi, however, was not finished with his report. He waited several moments before deciding to break the silence.

"I have more," Kakashi began, earning the attention of the Hokage and Jiraiya, the former motioning for Kakashi to continue. "As Jiraiya mentioned, I was quite bored with my forced stay in the hospital, so I did some digging with the help of my former comrades in ANBU."

"What information did you seek that required you to call upon such resources?" the Hokage asked curiously.

"Mainly, reports of Zabuza Curse Seal-like incidents in recent history," Kakashi informed the Hokage curtly.

The Hokage leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes in thought. "Hmm, I'm not quite sure what you're speaking of," the Hokage mused. "The closest incident that would be in the ANBU files that I believe to be relevant would be the monster attacks on local civilian establishments, and even then, nothing to warrant any explicit attention."

"I agree, nothing of relevance. In those cases, the 'monsters' were nothing a simple group of Chunin couldn't handle, I was looking for something different, something more . . . concrete," Kakashi admitted sourly. "However, much to my dismay, I found nothing, not a scrap of information."

"Why is it that I get the feeling that you had no intention of reporting to us ANBU's lack of Intel regarding the issue?" Jiraiya asked mildly.

Kakashi looked at him in surprise, "You mean you honestly don't know?"

"What are you talking about?" Jiraiya snapped irritably, wanting the younger ninja to get to the point so he and the Hokage could discuss other matters in private.

"I thought you were the one that dropped these off at my apartment," Kakashi mused quietly, dropping a stack of files onto the desk for the aged Hokage to see.

Kakashi stayed silent to allow for Jiraiya and the Hokage to quickly skim through the dozen or so reports he had presented them with. Once they were done, they booth looked at him with an expectant gaze, obviously waiting for him to continue.

"I have more of those reports at my apartment, but I didn't think I'd need to bring them all," Kakashi mused quietly. "I thought Jiraiya had given them to me in preparation for tonight's meeting. Obviously, I was wrong."

"I have never seen these reports before," the Hokage informed Jiraiya and Kakashi gravely. "Had I seen these, I would have acted upon them immediately."

"Have you gone through them all?" Jiraiya asked Kakashi curtly, as the silver haired younger man nodded.

"They all basically report the same thing: Ninja gaining bursts of power, but quickly being overcome by the ANBU squad they encounter. However, there is a trend in this collection of reports. These ninja started out weak, but are, over the last eight months, becoming more frequent and powerful."

"Eight months," Jiraiya mumbled thoughtfully, before turning to his old teacher. "Right around the time the Hidden Village in the Sound seemed to burst onto the scene."

"Sound?" Kakashi asked in surprise. "Many of these ninja mentioned in the reports had the symbol of Sound imbedded in their forehead protectors."

"A more important point to cover is why these reports were removed from the ANBU records before I could examine them?" the Hokage asked gravely. "Also, I wonder who it was that gave them to you in the first place?"

"I don't know, but everything we've talked about tonight seems to lead back to one man, and one man alone," Jiraiya muttered coldly, his normally jovial eyes now chips of ice.

"Yes," Sarutobi agreed wearily. "And I begin to find myself questioning what Orochimaru could possibly be planning with a new Hidden Village, a potential alliance with Suna, and a small horde of ninja high on the power of his Curse Seal."

"The answer to that, unfortunately, is rather obvious," Jiraiya muttered wearily.

* * *

"Sensei, we're -!" the girl's voice immediately died in her throat, startled by the sight of their sensei.

Sasuke and Hideaki, both huffing and puffing, finally caught up to their female teammate and joined in staring at their sensei in awe and confusion.

The clearing they had found Naruto in was rather small, and its only feature a large pond surrounded by numerous beautiful flowers native to the Land of Fire.

Naruto himself sat atop a flat piece of wood that balanced perfectly at the tip of a wooden pyramid protruding from the dead centre of the pond. His back was to the Genin, but all three could tell that he was sitting perfectly still aside from his slow and steady breathing. Circling him were several thin steams of water that danced through the air like a ribbon in the wind.

It was truly a sight to behold.

"What is it Sakura?" Naruto asked curiously, not bothering to turn to face his students. "I thought I asked you all to complete a task for me?"

An annoyed tick formed on Sasuke's brow at the mention of said task.

"She is not angry at you anymore," Hideaki replied curtly, annoyed at being forced to complete the menial task also.

"That's good to hear," Naruto commented, his voice eerily calm and betraying no emotion whatsoever. "And the other task?"

"We successfully completed the circuit you set up through the surrounding forest," Sasuke reported dutifully, if a little testily.

"We also disarmed all the traps you set out for us along the way," Hideaki reported, slightly miffed that Naruto wouldn't turn to face them while talking.

"Those traps were pretty dangerous," Sakura commented warily. "A few of them came pretty close to killing us, are you sure you didn't go a little too far with making that circuit?"

Naruto waited a few moments before answering. "First, those traps weren't intended for you, they were intended for me," he admitted, his voice still betraying no emotion. "And second, I didn't set those traps. A Special Jounin by the name of Mitarashi Anko set those traps knowing that I'm in this forest often."

"Wait a minute!" Sakura yelled angrily. "Are you saying that we've spent most of today doing your _dirty work_?"

Instead of answering, Naruto exhaled deeply as his shoulders sagged. He then leapt off his little platform as both it, and the water that was previously dancing around him dropped back into the pond.

"They were good training exercises!" Naruto exclaimed with a grin. "The fact that you helped me out in the process is just a bonus!"

"_How_ were they training exercises?" Hideaki challenged angrily.

"Well, the first exercise was testing your information gathering skills, while the second tested your teamwork!" Naruto had taken a few moments before answering the question, but he seemed pleased with himself nonetheless.

"You said those traps were set _by_ a Special Jounin _for_ a Jounin!" Sakura shrilled. "We could have been killed!"

Naruto just waved her off. "She wasn't trying to kill me, just scratch me a little. _She_ just says she likes the taste of my blood, _I_ just think she's bat-shit crazy," he exclaimed conspiratorially, as if the trees surrounding them would relate his derogative comments onto the woman in question.

Shaking her head in disbelief, Sakura's eyes widened as if recalling an important fact. "And what the heck was that over there?"

"Over where?" Naruto asked in confusion, shading his eyes from the sun with his hand and looking over where Sakura was pointing. "You see something?"

"Don't play dumb," Sasuke said darkly, re-entering the conversation. "What was that over the pond? Were you somehow using your Chakra to float atop that spike?"

"Oh _that_," Naruto exclaimed in a surprised tone, as if he hadn't known what they were talking about. "Nah, I was meditating while you guys were doing your little tasks."

"I do not know about you," Hideaki added suspiciously. "But when I meditate, water does not magically begin circling me."

"Yeah!" Sakura exclaimed loudly, agreeing with the Fire Lord's son. "And stop trying to avoid the question."

"Hideaki made an observation," Naruto pointed out smartly. "I don't recall any questions."

"Sasuke's question!" Sakura roared angrily, fed up with her temporary Sensei. "Answer Sasuke's question!"

In response to their question, Naruto tilted his head forward so that his blonde bangs cast an ominous shade over the top half of his face. A gentle breeze wafted through the mostly open clearing, sending an unwelcome chill up the Genin's spine. Finally, Naruto spoke in a voice that froze Sasuke, Hideaki and Sakura on the spot.

"That sounded a lot like a demand, Sakura," Naruto commented in a dark tone. "You wouldn't be trying to order around your Jounin instructor, would you?"

"N-no?" she answered weakly. "N-not at a-all."

As if someone had flipped a secret switch located somewhere on the blonde Jounin's person, his mood suddenly did a one-eighty and was all smiles again, "Oh! That's good!"

Letting out a relieved sigh, Hideaki looked around the clearing once more before turning to Naruto, "Are we going to be training here?"

"We are, but first . . ." Naruto pulled out a scroll from one of his Jounin vest's pockets and unrolled it so it was lying flat on the ground for all to see. The scroll's contents were organized and separated in neat lines, not all of them filled with characters.

"Oh, is that one of those sealing scrolls Hideaki uses for his traps?" Sakura asked curiously as Naruto began to channel a small amount of Chakra through said item.

"It's a storage scroll," Naruto corrected as a large bottle filled with dark green liquid and four cups materialized atop a small towel from seemingly out of nowhere. One set of characters towards the end of the scroll disappeared from the page as the items appeared. "It's a dead useful technique to know, and surprisingly simple to learn."

"Can you teach us?" Sasuke asked curiously, mildly impressed with the usefulness of such a simple technique.

"Hell no," Naruto instantly denied, much to the Sakura and Sasuke's annoyance. "It's not like making a storage scroll is a village secret. Stop being lazy and look it up at the library."

"And what is _that_?" Sakura asked, motioning to the liquid Naruto was pouring in the four separate cups.

"Vegetable juice," Naruto answered enthusiastically. "From now on, while training with me, you're going to have two glasses of this a day; once before training, and once afterwards. It's full of all the essential nutrients your body will ever need and healthy."

Hideaki shrugged, took one of the offered cups, and gulped it down as quickly as possible. "Ugh," the boy shuddered. "Could you have not made it at least slightly tasty?"

Naruto chuckled, but chose not to answer as he downed one of the cups himself before handing one to Sasuke who, reluctantly, gulped it down while pinching his nose.

"Sissy," Naruto taunted with a grin. "It's not that bad."

Sasuke grunted and chose not to verbally answer as he began to perform a series of standard stretches. Hideaki followed suit in preparation for their training.

"I don't know," Sakura muttered slowly as she eyed the vegetarian concoction before her warily. "This looks like it's full of protein and carbs. That's not very good for my figure . . ."

While Sasuke and Hideaki didn't seem to react to her observation, Naruto was a different matter.

"I'm sorry, what?" he asked incredulously. "I must have misheard you, because I could have sworn you'd just refused an _energy_ drink before _training_ because you're watching your _figure_. Correct me if I'm wrong."

"No . . ." Sakura shook her head and spoke to Naruto as if talking to a small child. "I'm on a strict diet, something like this, _twice a day_, can't be healthy."

Backing away from the girl, Naruto made his way over to Sasuke and Hideaki. "Is there a reason why you two aren't surprised by this shit?"

Hideaki shrugged nonchalantly. "Kakashi already tried feeding her vegetables and giving her a proper diet, but she refused." Taking a seat on the ground, he spread his legs apart and leaned forward as he continued to stretch. "We are not surprised because that is how most of the females in the Academy behave in regards to their figures and what not."

"You have _got_ to be shitting me," Naruto exclaimed in disbelief. "Hey pinkie, just be glad my buddy Anko isn't your instructor. She'd have already slit your throat the second you mentioned carbs and your figure for giving female ninjas a bad name!"

Sakura seemed offended by all the attention being placed on her figure and diet. "This isn't some kind of joke! Some of us have to try hard to keep perfect figures!"

"It's so cute how you think I'm joking," Naruto scolded the surprised Sakura with a frown. "Do you have any idea how much your very existence is an insult to every serious female ninja in existence? They train their arses off to be respected, and then we get retards like you worrying more about cosmetics than your village."

Hideaki frowned in disapproval. "I don't particularly like her, but is that not a little harsh? She is a woman, after all."

"Listen dipshit, I don't care if she's your _mother_. She stopped being a woman when she put on that forehead protector," Naruto snapped angrily. "Now go home, I'm not wasting my time training you if you don't even take your duties seriously."

Absolute silence met his claim as the three Genin looked to him in shock. Perhaps they were expecting him to be indifferent or soft like Kakashi?

"You're serious?" Sakura asked, her voice cracking. "You're kicking me off the team because I won't drink your stupid juice?"

She sounded angry, but Naruto couldn't bring himself to care. It was ninja like Sakura that gave female Ninja a bad name.

"Why the hell did you become a ninja?" Naruto asked her angrily, the ferociousness of his question causing her to backpedal against a nearby tree. "It's obvious you want to put no effort into improving yourself. You're only concern is your crush over there, when it _should_ be the welfare of the village! If you wanted to perv and fawn over boys all day, _you chose the wrong profession!_"

Each of the Genin, even the normally indifferent and broody Sasuke, were now staring at their instructor in shock as he unloaded on the pink-haired girl. They'd seen Naruto act in many ways, but never angry.

"If you're not going to give it your all to protect this village, why should I waste my time on you?" Naruto asked her rhetorically. "These two are more than determined to do _just that_. You're useless to me, and this village. I don't care if you're strong or not. Sure, both the guys over here have talent, but does it _look_ like I care?"

Sakura looked ready to burst out crying, but she was either too smart, or too scared to do so. Instead, she just stood there and continued to stare at her soon to be ex-Jounin Instructor in mute shock.

"They're trying their hardest to improve themselves," Naruto continued quietly. "When they come to training, its with the sole purpose to get stronger. Can the same be said for you? Or is hanging around your crush and wasting my time the only reason you're here?"

When it was obvious that Naruto was expecting an answer, Sakura mustered up all her courage and searched deep within herself for the right one.

"N-no . . ." she denied weakly. She grimaced in disgust at how horribly weak she sounded. Straightening her back, she levelled a glare at Naruto and answered more firmly. "No."

"No, what?" Naruto asked quietly, closing in on her with a menacing glare. Sakura did not budge and met Naruto's glare with one of her own.

"No, I'm not here to waste your time," she began, her voice starting out quiet before escalating as she continued her rant. "No, my only concern is _not_ Sasuke. No, I _do_ want to improve myself! No, I'm _not_ useless!"

"What was that?" Naruto challenged menacingly.

"I'm not useless!" Sakura shouted back at the top of her lungs.

"Then drink the _fucking_ juice!"

Storming over to the cup Naruto had prepared for her, she gulped down its horrible tasting contents in one go, wiped her mouth clean with her forearm and finished glaring at him angrily.

"Good!" Naruto exclaimed happily with a loud clap, much to the Genin's shock. How could he go from yelling one second, to happy and cheerfully the next? "I really think we made progress here, but first . . ."

Sakura yelped when Naruto suddenly grabbed her by the forearm and began to lead her to the pond nearby.

"What are you -!" her exclamation was cut short by the cheerfully blonde.

"Deep breath, now!" was all the warning she'd received before having her head dunked into the pond, face first. Sasuke and Hideaki made to come to the girl's aid when Naruto casually waved them off with his free hand. "Relax."

"You're drowning her," Sasuke pointed out coldly.

With a grin, Naruto let the girl go before walking over to where he had unsealed the vegetable juice.

"Are you crazy?" the girl exclaimed shrilly after she finally began to control her breathing. "I could have drowned, you psycho!"

Naruto rolled his eyes as he came back to Sakura with the towel he had sealed into the scroll with the vegetable juice. "Oh, _do_ shut up."

Sakura yelped as Naruto began to dry her hair with the towel. "What are you doing?" Sakura shrieked, her voice muffled by the towel.

"I could smell the shit in your hair from half a kilometre away, it had to go," Naruto explained nonchalantly. "And that glittery stuff was just stupid. Are you still serious about being a ninja?"

"Y-yeah, I am!" she answered shakily. "You could have just told me! I would have done it myself!"

"No matter what, women _always_ take forever to wash their hair," Naruto exclaimed sagely, mainly directing that bit of information towards the two boys. "Write that down somewhere."

Once done drying her hair, he reached down into the pouch tied around his thigh and pulled out two long needles.

"As you may know, these are Senbon needles," he showed the three Genin the needles as if preparing to perform a magic trick with them. "And also notice, Sakura has long hair."

"What . . . do you . . ." Sakura seemed reluctant to voice her thoughts, but soldiered on anyway. "Do you _have_ to cut my hair? I'd rather you . . . not."

"Relax," Naruto replied soothingly as he took two strands of Sakura's hair in his hand. "Now watch as I transform this into something useful!"

Sakura had shut her eyes tightly, her face set in a grimace as she waited for her beautiful hair to be sliced off. The boys however, watched, transfixed, as Naruto's hands moved in a blur of speed before stopping to reveal something they had not been expecting.

Sakura's hair, once long and wavy, was not tied up in a loose bun with the two Senbon needles sticking out from it at different angles.

"There, useful!" Naruto showed the two boys proudly. "Not only does it keep the hair out of her eyes, but she can hide lots of things in that bun to use in surprise attacks, those Senbon needles for example! C'mon, admit it, I'm awesome."

Tentatively, Sakura reached up to her head, pushed one of her long bangs to the side and behind her ear, and felt for the large bun that was now sitting towards the back of her head.

"How did you do that?" Hideaki asked in confusion, curious despite himself. "Your hands moved so quickly, so expertly. Are you some kind of hair dresser in your off time?"

"No," Naruto answered with a chuckle. "My old Genin teammate taught me actually. She used to hate how her hair always got in the way when we fought, so she taught me how to put it up in a bun like that."

"And if she decides she does not like her hair that way?" Hideaki asked in amusement. "What happens when she comes back tomorrow with her hair exactly how it was earlier?"

"Then I'll keep dunking her and getting rid of all that shit in her hair until the message sinks in," Naruto answered promptly.

Sakura was kneeling over by the pond, looking at her reflection in the water with awe when Naruto clapped his hands once again to get their attention.

"Okay, we're going to train for the rest of today, and tomorrow, we're going to take a mission," Naruto announced with faux enthusiasm. "So meet me later at the Ichiraku Ramen Stand, I need to give you all something for tomorrow; but for now . . . training!"

* * *

An exhausted Sasuke trudged through the front door of his home that evening looking worse for ware – to say the least. Somehow managing to remove his sandals with a flick of his ankles, he barely made it to the couch in his living room before exhaustion finally won out and he collapsed, face first.

"Sasuke?" Mikoto called from the kitchen curiously. "Is that you?"

A noncommittal grunt muffled by one of the couch's cushions was all she got for an answer.

"Oh, welcome home!" Mikoto greeted merrily, wiping her dirty, flour covered hands on her floral apron. She approached the couch her son had chosen to collapse on and smiled down at him. "You're back late. Rough day?"

Sasuke barely managed to tilt his head to the side, but the glare from his one visible eye that was directed at her was all the answer she needed.

"Oh, my poor baby!" Mikoto cooed as she ruffled her son's sweat-soaked hair affectionately. "Well, dinner's not quite ready, but you'll be pleased to know I'm baking your favourite cake for desert!"

A less aggravated grunt was Sasuke's response to this. Clearly, hearing this news pleased him somewhat.

Mikoto laughed softly as she rounded the couched and sat so that Sasuke's head could rest on her lap. She continued to stroke his hair with one hand while using the other to absently clean the dirt off his face. Her cake was in the oven and the food was still cooking, so she could sit and spent some rare time with her son for a little while without worrying.

"So I take it Naruto ran you into the ground today, huh?" Mikoto asked conversationally. The fact that her son's body tensed at the mention of the Jounin's name did not escape her notice. "Did he make you drink that god awful juice too? Goodness, that stuff tastes horrible . . ."

Manoeuvring so that he was now lying on his back and looking up into his mother's face, he frowned and asked, "Why do you spend so much time with him?"

Surprised by her son's blunt question, she took several moments to find an adequate response. "He's a good friend," she answered truthfully. "You know I don't have many of those anymore, Naruto comes over from time to time to keep me company now that you're so busy with your training."

A recent memory of Naruto berating him for ignoring his mother sent an unwelcome wave of guilt through the ebony haired teen. He hadn't believed the idiot at the time, nor cared to listen, but it was obviously the truth.

It was hard to deny the facts when they're literally staring at you in the face.

"I don't like him," Sasuke declared abruptly. "I don't want you to see him so much anymore – can't you get other friends?"

Mikoto almost laughed at how absurd this conversation would seem to an outsider. She felt like a teenager being scolded by her father for meeting a boy he didn't approve of. Unfortunately, Sasuke seemed to be dead serious, so laughing at him probably wouldn't be the smartest idea.

"Sasuke," Mikoto began with a weary sigh. "Naruto's a good person, and you owe him more than you could possibly know. Can you _please_ try to be nice to him? For me?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed angrily, "Nice person?" he challenged. "You're aware he carried a book around with him that is solely filled with photos of you, right?"

This time, Mikoto did laugh. "Oh my!" she exclaimed jovially. "Don't worry about that sweetie, I'm sure it's only harmless."

Realising how incredibly awkward this conversation was about to become, Sasuke mentally cringed before continuing with what he wanted to say.

"He told us last week that he uses some of those pictures to masturbate," he deadpanned, cringing mentally once more with how awkward he felt. "Nice person, yeah right."

"He said that, did he?" Mikoto mused to herself with a dangerous gleam in her eyes. "Don't worry, mummy can take of herself. I've dealt with perverts before, after all, your mum's hot stuff – it's only natural."

Sasuke's features morphed into a look of disgust, "Ugh."

Laughing, Mikoto got up from the couch and pulled her son up with her. "Come on, tough guy. Dinner's almost ready – why don't you set the table?"

"What about Naruto?" Sasuke asked gruffly, miffed that he seemed to be getting let off the hook so easily. His thoughts were immediately quashed as his mother smirked evilly.

"Don't worry sweetie, he'll get his."

* * *

"Wow," Naruto exclaimed in an impressed tone. "You actually look pretty hot, I'm impressed!"

Ayame, dressed in a form fitting navy blue dress that hugged her curves and showed a tasteful amount of cleavage, was waiting anxiously by her family's Ramen stand for her date for the evening to come and pick her up.

Rolling her eyes at Naruto's less than desirable compliment, she hit him over the head with her handbag and smirked at him playfully. "Jerk."

"Oh, you know I'm joking," Naruto said with a chuckle, knowing the girl took no real offence – she knew she looked good. "If you weren't such a rug muncher, I'd _so_ tear that . . ."

"_Shut up!_" Ayame hissed urgently, looking around frantically to make sure no one had overheard him. Much to her annoyance though, the blonde just laughed.

"Relax, the old man is preparing for the dinner rush out back, he can't hear us over the boiling oil," he said in a placating manner. "Your muff diving ways will remain a secret for now."

Sighing irritably, she shook her head before grinning, "You're having _way_ too much fun with this."

"Is it that obvious?" he asked with a grin of his own.

"Thanks for covering for me tonight by the way," Ayame said gratefully, eying the blonde who was now currently dressed in one of her father's old chef uniforms and rubbing down the counter. "I owe you one."

"Just don't forget me when you decide dildo's just aren't -!" Naruto was cut off when Ayame slapped him on the chest and pointed down the street excitedly.

"Shut-up you idiot! She's here!"

Leaning over the counter so he could spy Akira for himself, he let out a whistle of appreciation at the sight of the voracious beauty. Her sandy blonde hair was tied back in a low ponytail while two long bangs framed her face. She was also wearing a tight black dress which, unlike Ayame's, showed a much more generous amount of cleavage.

"Holy shit," Naruto drawled in shock. "Why can't I be a lesbian?"

"Oh my god, she looks so beautiful," Ayame gushed dreamily. "I can't believe she agreed to go on a date with _me_!"

"Alright! Low five Ayame!" Naruto exclaimed in a congratulatory tone, his hand was resting palm up on the counter, and out of Akira's sight.

Ayame was about to bat his hand away and chide him for being an idiot once more when she caught one more glance of her date for the evening. Grinning, she winked at Naruto and slapped his hand with her own.

"Yeah, that's right." Naruto grinned broadly when Ayame didn't leave him hanging.

Akira finally reached them and immediately leaned in to give Ayame a small peck on the lips. The brunette blushed prettily under Naruto's scrutiny. "Hey Ayame, you look beautiful tonight."

"S-so do you," Ayame replied in kind, tucking a strand of loose brown hair behind her ear. "I'm sure you've met Naruto before."

Turning to the Ramen stand in surprise, Akira rolled her eyes at the sight of the grinning blonde. "I'm almost didn't recognize you in that uniform; I thought you were a ninja?"

"Oh, he is," Ayame quickly jumped in to explain the situation. "He's just doing me a favour by filling in me for tonight so I can go out with you."

"A big bad Jounin working at a Ramen stand so you can come out with little old me?" Akira asked in surprise, eyeing the smug blonde with a small amount of respect. "I'm honestly surprised, that's kind of sweet."

"Yeah, I know, I'm _that_ awesome," Naruto agreed before pulling out a small digital camera, much to Ayame's embarrassment. "What? You think I wouldn't get a picture of you going out on your first date? Keep dreaming! Smile now!"

Ayame was too embarrassed to do anything, but Akira quickly wrapped an arm around her waist, tilted her head so that it was barely touching Ayame's and smiled brightly as Naruto took the picture.

"Aww," Naruto exclaimed. "You two look so good together . . . so, _so_ good . . ."

"Naruto!" Ayame snapped, as Akira merely laughed jovially. "He's just an idiot, ignore him."

"It's fine, he seems like a really good friend," Akira smiled at Naruto who blushed himself under the attention. "I'm kind of jealous, I wish I had friends like that."

"Oh-oh, I think I'm officially embarrassed now," Naruto admitted with a chuckle to the amused couple. "Quick, you two better go so I can get back to work, have fun now!"

Impulsively, both girls leaned over the counter to plant a kiss on each of his scarred cheeks before grinning and skipping off together, arm in arm.

Naruto was too shocked to do anything but stare blankly at nothing for several moments before finally snapping out of his daze. "Remember to keep the lights _on_ when you start filming tonight! None of that green, night-vision shit!"

It looked like Ayame was about to turn around and start yelling obscenities at him, but Akira merely laughed, grabbed the girl's arm tighter, and continued off into the night.

Naruto sighed happily when the girl's finally disappeared around the corner, "Man, I just got kissed by two hot lesbians . . . Pervy Sage would be _so_ jealous."

"Kissed by what?" Teuchi asked in confusion as he came form the kitchen and overheard the last part of Naruto's comment.

"Nothing!" Naruto yelped in surprise, glad he hadn't been overheard. "You must be hearing things you old fart!"

"Just get back to work you lazy good for nothing!" Teuchi yelled back grumpily. "Just because Ayame wanted the night off for god knows what reason, doesn't mean you get to screw around and eat free Ramen!"

"Alright you fucking slave driver," Naruto muttered under his breath as he began to prepare some vegetables.

"What was that?" Teuchi yelled from the kitchen out back.

"I said alright, you fucking slave driver!"

"Stupid brat!"

"Naruto sensei?" he heard a voice call out to him in confusion as he turned to see Sakura and Hideaki standing on the other side of the counter and staring at him in shock.

"Oh, sup students?" Naruto greeted with a casual wave. "Where's the angry one?"

"If he is not here, he is probably not coming," Hideaki said with a shrug before taking a seat opposite Naruto. "I get the feeling he doesn't like you too much."

"Brilliant observation," Naruto remarked sarcastically. "For that, you get a prize!"

Reaching out from under the counter, he tossed Sakura and Hideaki each a thin box wrapped in brown wrapping paper.

As they were unwrapping the boxes, Sakura paused and looked to Naruto in confusion. "Why are you working here? I thought Jounin made lots of money."

"Oh, I'm not working here for money," Naruto shook her off as the Genin both pulled out two pieces of cloth from the box. "I'm just filling in for a friend."

"What are these?" Hideaki asked in confusion. At first he thought they looked like nets, but a closer inspection revealed that they were clothing, or rather, a shirt and pants. The material was slightly elastic and seemingly covered in metal wiring in the shape of a net, so it wasn't actually transparent through the patterns.

"Those are ninja mesh shirts and pants," Naruto began to explain. "You wear them under your normal clothes for protection, I wear a set all the time."

"What do they do?" Sakura asked in confusion as she flattened out a pair against her body.

"They'll stop all but the sharpest of weapons from piercing anything that's covered at least once," Naruto informed them. "I've actually seen one stop a sword from piercing a comrade's heart once – dead useful."

"Did you get us these because we're going on a mission tomorrow?" Sakura asked in surprise. "That's actually kind of . . . thoughtful."

"Why are people always surprised when I show my good qualities?" Naruto grouched before grinning at her. "Pretty much. I'm of the opinion that every ninja should be forced to wear one of these, especially when leaving the village for missions. They're kind of expensive though, and hard to make, so it's understandable why they're not widely distributed."

"These wouldn't stop Chakra enhanced attacks, would it?" Hideaki asked curiously.

"Right in one," Naruto said with a nod. "But if you're relying on _those_ to save you against someone who's capable of sharpening their weapons with Chakra, you're probably already fucked anyway. They're mostly for lessening damage from Kunai and Shuriken diversion fire."

"Thanks," Sakura said sincerely before grinning up at him. "I took what you said earlier seriously, and I bought this!" she said while motioning to herself and pirouetting for him. The girl was wearing a black Battle Kimono instead of her regular red dress. "It's made of strong fabric too, and is super light-weight. The shopkeeper also said that it's excellent for concealing weapons, so I bought a bunch of Senbon and I've been practising with them since we stopped training!"

"I'm impressed," Naruto admitted proudly. "It seems you've taken our talk to heart."

"I refuse to be useless anymore," Sakura said with a determined glint in her eyes.

"Well, that's good," Naruto smiled before shooing them off. "You kids better skedaddle before the evil old man who runs this store comes out and yells at me for slacking off again."

"Actually," Hideaki began with a smile as he slipped into one of the chairs, Sakura quickly following suit beside him. "What is today's special?"

**A/N: Unbetad. Sorry for late update.**


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

Being berefit of any true military presence, Sea country was a rather peaceful island nation that mostly relied on others for its protection. Being a rather small nation with nothing much in the terms of tourist attractions, the Sea country wasn't exactly an economic powerhouse. In fact, were it not for its booming fishing industry the country may have descended into poverty long ago.

Luckily for the citizens of the Sea country though, fishing remains a popular occupation to this day, with many families passing down the secrets to their trade to the younger generation in the hopes that their beloved country would not fall into poverty.

"Nothing beats the summer nights in Haha," a young man with wild black hair, his face covered in stubble while clad in worn fishing apparel commented dreamily. "Especially on nights like tonight, where the moon is full and there're no clouds to cover the stars in the sky."

"Oh god, make it stop," an older man wearing a bucket hat with a cigarette hanging from his cracked lips muttered wearily as he recast his line. "I told you we shouldn't have brought him Takazu! He's gonna be spouting off shit like that all night – he'll scare all the fish away, he will."

The aforementioned Takazu chuckled quietly as he reeled in his own line and began to change lures, an impressive feat given that he was missing three fingers, two from his right, and one from his left hand. "Leave him be Jotaki, I remember a time you were just like that when your boy was born."

"His daughter was born almost three years ago now!" Jotaki snapped as he placed one of his fishing rods in a holster on the edge of the boat. "You'd thing the post-birth phase would have worn off by now!"

"That reminds me," the younger man suddenly exclaimed, seemingly ignoring Jotaki's remarks completely. "It's my baby girl's third birthday tomorrow! I gotta catch some nice ones tonight so I can get her an extra special present!"

"Good luck with that Ryoshi," Takazu chuckled again as Ryoshi fumbled in his pockets for something.

Pulling out a photograph and showing it to the two older men, he couldn't help the large smile that blossomed on his features. "Look at her, isn't she the cutest?"

Takazu took the offered picture and gave it a quick look before showing it to Jotaki.

"I came here to fish," Jotaki growled out with a roll of his eyes. "Not hear you brag about your daughter all night."

"Yeah, yeah, you're just jealous you can't have a daughter as cute as mine!" Ryoshi grinned as he pocketed the photo once more.

"Give me a woman as hot as yours and I'll sure as hell try," Jotaki grumbled under his breath quietly, causing Takazu to chuckle.

If Ryoshi had heard Jotaki's comment, he certainly didn't act like it. "Why did we bring the boat all the way out here anyway?"

"So we can avoid the others fishing tonight," Takazu answered promptly before raising a brow in Ryoshi's direction. "Is there a problem with this spot?"

Ryoshi chuckled nervously before pointing to the island to the south of their position. "No problem, but isn't that Kika Island?"

It was hard to spot at night, but the moon gave off just enough light so that you could see it in the distance. A large, dark blob on the horizon that loomed ominously in the distance.

"So it is," Jotaki replied. "What of it?"

"Oh, it's nothing," Ryoshi said with a far off look. "I just remember by old man telling me as a kid that Kika Island was cursed, and to never go anywhere near it. He never said why though."

Jotaki and Takazu shared a troubled look at the mentioning of their old fishing buddy. Shiko, Ryoshi's father, had gone fishing by himself one night saying that he could use the extra cash, only to never be heard from again. His sudden disappearance was still a sore topic for the family. Many thought that he had run off with another woman for a better life elsewhere, but his family and friends knew better.

Shiko was never a man to abandon his friends or family.

"People used to say that Kika Island was a cursed island, and that you should never sail anywhere near it," Jotaki suddenly said, breaking the awkward silence that consumed them. "They say that those who would sail too close would disappear, never to return . . . but that's just an urban legend. I dunno why your dad believed in it so much."

Ryoshi nodded his head solemnly in agreement. Suddenly, one of his fishing rods jerked as it caught something. "Besides!" Ryoshi exclaimed happily as he jumped to his feet and lunged for the rod, "With no one else around for miles, this spot is golden!"

Jotaki and Takazu grinned as they watched Ryoshi wrestle with what had to be a huge fish, completely oblivious to the large, scaled tail silently rising up from the murky depths behind them.

After several minutes of struggling, Ryoshi's line snapped as the fish made away with his lure.

"Damn! I almost had that one!" Ryoshi exclaimed angrily as he turned to his fishing buddies, only to find an empty boat. "Oh, _ha-ha_, really funny!" Ryoshi drawled as he moved over to the other side of the boat and to the benches where Jotaki and Takazu had been sitting. "But you're not gonna fool me with a joke as lame as _that_-!"

He pulled away the tackle boxes sitting beneath the benches, expecting to find his older companions hiding, only to find nothing.

"What the -?" he swivelled around and examined the rest of the small fishing boat, but no matter where he looked, his two friends were nowhere to be seen.

"Did you guys _really_ jump in the water just to try and scare me?" he asked aloud incredulously, expecting the two older men to jump out of nowhere and yell 'surprise' at any moment, as out of character as that may have seemed.

"Okay guys, this isn't funny anymore, where the hell are you?" A large shadow – roughly the size of a man - glided just beneath the surface of the water just over the edge of the boat, as Ryoshi leaned over to get a closer look. Were his eyes playing tricks on him, he could have _sworn_ he just saw something.

So intent was he to try and discover the source of the mysterious shadow that he failed to see the large, scaly tail that silently pierced the surface of the water behind him.

The tail wrapped around Ryoshi's torso, lifted him easily into the air and violently yanked him into the inky darkness below, so quick that he could barely give a yelp of surprise.

The next day, when the three men were reported missing, search crews would be sent out only to find an empty fishing boat sailing near the 'Cursed Island', Kika.

* * *

"I'm assigning your team to a C-ranked mission to the Sea country," the scarred Chunin said as he handed Naruto a mission scroll.

"What kind of mission is it?" Hideaki asked curiously as Naruto scanned through the contents of the scroll expertly.

"Investigation," Naruto promptly answered as he continued to skim through the mission details. "A woman's requesting help in locating her husband who disappeared off the Coast of Haha Island last week," he turned to look at the scarred man. "What's with the delay, there's not much hope of finding him alive after so long . . ."

"Being a citizen of the Sea Country, I'd say she probably sent the mission to the Hidden Mist first before trying here after it was rejected or failed," the man said with a shrug.

"Um, Sensei," Sakura interrupted nervously as she addressed the man behind the desk. "What does being a citizen of Sea Country automatically mean the woman would send her request to the Hidden Mist Village first?"

"You can call me Iruka now, Sakura," the Chunin level ninja said with a smile. "I'm not your sensei anymore. As for your question – Sea Country is known to send shipments of gold to the Hidden Mist weekly for their assistance and protection. Just like a citizen of the Fire Country would get a discount on mission prices when coming to us, they get a discount when going to the Hidden Mist."

"You think the Hidden Mist took the mission and failed?" Sasuke asked curiously, trying to peer at the mission scroll himself.

"No," Naruto answered promptly. "At least, the people who deal with the mission rankings don't, otherwise it'd be rated higher than a C-rank."

"Why is that?" Hideaki asked curiously, his teammates seemed equally as curious.

Iruka chose to answer this time. "Because C-ranked missions don't deal with ninjas, or foes that rival ninjas in strength. If a team of ninja from the Hidden Mist _did_ fail, it would obviously mean that they either encountered other ninja, or foes with ninja-like strength."

"Either that, or they're just bad," Naruto contributed unhelpfully. "You guys go get ready. The mission shouldn't take longer than a fortnight. I'll meet you at the Eastern gate in an hour."

* * *

"Mum, I'm leaving the village for another mission!" Sasuke called into the house as he removed his sandals. "Can you get my travelling pack ready?"

"It's already ready dear!" Mikoto's voice called back. Confused, Sasuke followed the source of the voice to the kitchen only to almost trip over his own feet when he saw Naruto sitting at the kitchen bench looking at the oven greedily.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Sasuke asked snidely, as Mikoto cuffed her son over the back of the head – much to Naruto's amusement.

"Don't be rude," she admonished. "And Naruto's here to give you a present!"

"Over there," Naruto motioned to the thin box on the table. "I gave one each to your teammates last night, put that on before we leave."

Dubiously opening the package, not putting it past his idiot sensei to prank him for no reason whatsoever, he was surprised to find a mesh under shirt and pants. Having grown up around ninja his entire life, Sasuke recognized it immediately. He also knew they were very expensive, which is why he hadn't bought one himself already.

"What's this for?" he asked Naruto dubiously, not willing to accept the fact that Naruto had gotten him something for nothing.

"Well," Naruto began slowly. "You put it on under your clothes, and it stops pointy things from hurting you."

Closing his eyes and taking a few calming breaths, he tried again. "Why did you get this for me?"

Naruto and Mikoto shared an amused look before Naruto answered, "Because it's my job to protect you, and any ninja who can afford these and doesn't wear them is an idiot?"

"Hn, whatever," Sasuke grunted as he went to his room to get changed. "By the way, did you punish him like you said you would last night?"

"Punish me?" Naruto asked curiously, his interest piqued. "Sounds kinky, what'd I do?"

Mikoto pulled a cake out of the oven before turning to Naruto with a downright scary gleam in her eyes. "What's this I hear about pictures of me and 'assassinations' from my son Naruto?"

Mikoto had been waving the deliciously smelling cake in front of Naruto like a doggy treat as she asked this, before suddenly pulling it away to snap him out of his daze.

"Hmm? Assassinations? I dunno what he's talking about, but he's lying," Naruto promptly answered as he made to snatch the cake out of Mikoto's grasp, only to fail when she slapped his hand away.

"So you mean to tell me that you didn't tell my son, and his two teammates, that you masturbate over pictures of me that you carry around with you at all times?" Her voice never stopped being pleasant, but the gleam in her eyes got steadily more dangerous. Not that Naruto noticed, his attention solely focused on the cake before him.

"Please!" Naruto exclaimed with a cocky tone. "As if I need pictures for _that_, I have a very, _very_ vivid imagination . . ." He paused, finally realizing exactly what he was saying, and who was in the room with him. "Oh wow, _that_ came out wrong."

"No cake for you!" she announced angrily as she cut a slice for her son and put it back in the oven.

"No, no, no, I didn't mean it!" Naruto pleaded, but it was all for naught.

"Oh?" Mikoto's mood suddenly did a one-eighty. Where she was just angry a few moments ago, she now looked like a kicked puppy. "Are you saying I'm . . . that I'm not good enough then?"

"What, when did I . . ." Naruto then paused, frowned, and then began chuckling as he wagged his finger in her direction. "Clever. _Very_ clever. I know what this is. This is a trap! Nope! Not falling for it."

"You're still not getting any cake," Mikoto deadpanned, slightly miffed that she hadn't trapped Naruto like she had planned to.

"But-but-that's not _fair_!" Naruto whined, sending the boy who was sitting beside him his best death glare as he smugly at his cake with deliberate slowness. It was enough to cause the ebony haired Genin to pause as the cake rose to his mouth before Mikoto slapped Naruto with a spatula.

"Stop glaring at Sasuke like it's his fault!" Mikoto snapped. "This wouldn't have happened if you weren't such a pervert!"

"This wouldn't have happened if you weren't so beautiful!" Naruto replied with his most charming smile. "When it comes down to it, this is all about accountability. I think you should, being the adult, fess up and take responsibility for being a beautiful woman and _give me some cake!_"

Naruto made a desperate lunge for the oven only to be pulled back by the vest from Mikoto and forcibly sat down on the kitchen stool. "Flattery will get you nowhere!"

"Are you sure?" Naruto tried again, sauntering around the kitchen bench until he was standing right beside the still glaring Mikoto. "Because you really _are_ beautiful, you know. Can I really be blamed for being completely smitten with you when your smile alone can light up the darkest of nights, and your warm eyes can make me feel like the happiest man alive?"

Sasuke made a noise of disgust as his face scrunched up in revulsion while Mikoto battered her eyelashes playfully at Naruto. "Oh stop it, you charmer . . ."

"No, no, I'm completely serious." Naruto continued as he moved around the woman and inhaled deeply. "Your scent alone, like honey and apricots, sends shivers down my spine, and your behind," he lowered himself and gazed upon her glorious derriere. "I just wanna spank it raw, or at least until you ask Master Naruto to kiss it better . . ."

When he realized what he'd said, he slowly looked up to meet Mikoto's murderous gaze – one he found incredibly hot – with a sheepish chuckle, "Too much?"

With as much strength as she could muster, Mikoto brought her closed fist down unto Naruto's head. Being in a crouching position did little for his balance as he crashed chin first into the floor . . . before exploding in a puff of smoke.

Using the smoke as cover, the real Naruto stole the rest of the freshly baked cake from the oven before making a run for it.

"Thanks for the cake Mikoto! See you when I get back! Love you!" Naruto yelled over his shoulder as he disappeared in a burst of speed that neither Uchiha could ever hope to follow, his prize clutched tightly to his chest.

Growling in annoyance as the smoke from the Shadow Clone technique finally cleared, Mikoto turned to her son with a forced look of calm. "It's okay, he'll get what's coming to him when you get back from your mission."

"What? So you can let him grope you again only for you to bake him a cake? I'm sure he's _terrified_," Sasuke deadpanned, only to have his mother's wrath directed at him as she snatched the crumb filled plate from his grasp and gave him a harsh glare before kissing him on the forehead.

"You better go before you're late for your mission _honey_!" she snapped before grinning deviously and ruffling her son's hair so hard that it was almost painful. "Be safe, and know that mummy loves you!"

Sasuke groaned in annoyance, swearing he could hear his new sensei's boisterous laugh on the wind.

Approaching the Eastern Gate, Sasuke wasn't surprised to see Hideaki and Sakura waiting with a smug Naruto. The young Jounin was making a show of licking each of his fingers, no doubt savouring the taste his mother's cake left on his fingers.

"Nice of you to join us, Sasuke," Naruto greeted slyly, much to the boy's annoyance. He then took out a small box of pills from his pouch and gulped down two of them before grinning at the Uchiha. "That's what you get for trying to rat me out _bitch_."

Sasuke's left eye twitched in annoyance while Sakura looked at Naruto with an angry frown. "You're so immature! It's like having that idiot Kiba from the academy for a sensei!"

"Kiba? As in _Inuzuka_ Kiba? I know him," Naruto commented idly as he spied Hideaki over on his own going over a map of the Fire Country and its surrounding regions. "Good kid, if a little bit loud. You shouldn't say mean things about your comrades."

"Why am I not surprised?" Sakura deadpanned as the quartet headed out through the East Gate and began their mission.

"Sensei, why are we heading east?" Hideaki suddenly asked from behind as he continued to scan the map. "Would it not be better to head south through Tea Country and get a Ferry to Sea Country from there?"

"Ah, well done my idiot student! You can read maps well," Naruto . . . sort of complimented as Hideaki narrowed his eyes in annoyance at him. "However, that would require travelling a long distance by foot, and then taking a ferry crammed full of civilians and smelly fisherman for a day to get to the Sea Country."

"Do you have a better idea?" Sakura challenged heatedly, starting to get annoyed at how Naruto was constantly demeaning them.

Leaping onto the branch of a nearby tree, Naruto turned to the three Genin and grinned widely.

"Of course, we're headed to Kashiwazaki!" Naruto declared as Sasuke, Sakura and Hideaki followed him through the trees heading east.

"You mean that huge port city?" Sakura asked incredulously. "We're going to ride a _boat_ all the way to Sea Country from Eastern Fire Country? That'll take forever!"

Naruto didn't stop moving as he leapt from branch to branch with a practised ease, making sure not to move too fast for the Genin, as he replied. "'Boat' is such a general term. And Uzumaki Naruto _always_ travels in style!"

* * *

"How's the good doctor this evening?" A disembodied voice asked from the darkness. The doctor in question yelped in fright, not having sensed the presence of the other man in the room as he entered.

"What does it matter to you?" the doctor snapped. "If you've come here to bother me some more, don't. I have enough on my plate without your incessant babbling to make matters worse."

"Aw, c'mon Amachi!" the voice was given a face as a young man stepped out of the shadows and grinned at Amachi's annoyed face playfully. He was clad in a loose-fitting black haori that was tied at the waist by a large, purple rope belt. The belt looped around his waist twice before forming a large, looped knot at the back. "We may have been forced to work together, but that doesn't mean we can't be friends, am I right?"

"As soon as I can find the source of your Curse Seal's . . . _unique_ manifestation, we will never see each other again," Amachi sneered as he rounded the sole desk in the room and took a seat in the large, plush chair. He spent several moments shifting through some of his research documents before looking up through spectacles at the still grinning ninja. "If that's all, Junichi, don't let the door hit you on the way out."

Instead of being offended by the rude dismissal, Junichi just continued to smile eerily at Amachi as if he'd never heard him.

"And how is your research coming?" the question only served to annoy the Medic-nin, and he made sure Junichi knew it.

"Out of all of the test subjects you have brought me, only one has survived! Barely, at that!" Amachi snapped at the nonplussed ninja. "Not even those pathetic ninja from Mist survived long enough to matter! How am I supposed to give Lord Orochimaru the results he demands when every person you bring back here dies before they can prove any use?!"

"That's your fault, not mine," Junichi reminded the fuming Medic-nin. "I bring in the guinea pigs, and you do the 'mad scientist' stuff. It's not my problem if your research is proving . . ." at that moment, as Junichi paused in his speech, his smile dropped as a large spike of killing intent almost caused Amachi to choke on his own spit, "_worthless_."

Taking a few moments to compose himself, Amachi finally responded. "I-I just need some more time," he pleaded fearfully, knowing exactly what this ninja was capable of. "Just a few more months and Lord Orochimaru will have his _special_ army, I swear it!"

Junichi's eyebrows rose in interest as he began to stroll around the Medic-nin's underground office and inspect the various jars filled with human organs. "Here's the thing Amachi," Junichi began quietly, his tone pleasant once again. "I don't know how much time you have left. That's up to Lord Orochimaru to decide, as is the usefulness of your continued existence. So, as you can no doubt ascertain, it's rather pointless pleading to me."

"B-but you can tell him!" Amachi pleaded once again, the possibility of . . . displeasing his Lord in any way frightened him more than any death sentence possibly could. An execution guaranteed a quick death, displeasing Orochimaru guaranteed . . . well, whatever it was it definitely _wasn't_ quick. "He'll listen to you! You've seen the newest one! The progress, it's astounding! You can tell him I'm close!"

"He'll _listen_ to me?" Junichi asked with an amused chuckle. "He'll do no such thing. In fact, he'll just as likely kill me for your failure as he would you, so, you _could_ say that our fates are intertwined, as it were."

Closing his eyes and taking a few shaky breaths to calm his nerves, Amachi reopened them with a look of determination that made Junichi grin. "I'll do my job, and you do yours. Make sure that any ninja that come sniffing around are dealt with."

Junichi's grin widened as he nodded in approval, "That's not a problem. So see to it that you keep up your end of the deal," he commented dryly. "Because I'll _not_ be dying for the likes of _you_."

Replacing a jar containing a human brain on the shelf from whence he'd taken it, Junichi waved goodbye to Amachi before exiting the man's office.

It wasn't until an hour later that Amachi was able to calm down enough to think clearly and continue his research.

He had a lot of work to do, and evidently, not a lot of time to do it.

* * *

"A Cruise ship?!" Sakura asked incredulously as she eyed the beautifully decorated cabin Team Seven had been set up in for the next three days. When Naruto had said that he always travelled in style, Sakura had thought it was just one of those stupid things he always said just for the sake of it.

Evidently though, he was being serious. A First Class cabin on one of the biggest cruise ships she'd ever seen would certainly make his claim more believable, as she was beginning to understand.

The cabin was spacious and sported a king sized bed, its own kitchen and bathroom, and a beautiful view of the sea as it passed by their large window on the upper most level of the ship. Of course, Naruto had claimed the bed immediately upon entering the cabin, forcing the Genin to take the floor with their sleeping bags, but even _that_ was better than what they would have slept on had they not taken the cruise to the Sea Country.

Still, that didn't stop Sakura from being envious of her new sensei, that bed looked heavenly. What ever happened to chivalry these days?

"The boat that would have taken us to Sea Country from Tea Country isn't leaving for another three days, and as you know, we'll already be in Sea by then," Naruto explained with a pleasant sigh. There was no way he'd be able to sleep in his own bed when he returned home, not after lying on this one.

"How did you even persuade them to let us come aboard, let alone to allow us a First Class cabin?" Hideaki asked curiously as he gazed out the window at the dark blue ocean.

"The big boss man owes me a favour," Naruto answered vaguely. "I can't remember what for, but I do remember that he owed me a favour."

"How did he know it was _you_ he owed a favour to?" Sasuke asked dryly as he munched on an apple from the kitchen. "I thought you've been working in ANBU for . . . a long time."

"He gave me a card to use when I wanted to cash in," Naruto shrugged. "I remembered it when I read the mission scroll, never had a chance to use it until now."

"Well, he definitely seemed excited enough to see you," Sakura commented dryly, remembering the portly man, and how he continued to try and 'introduce' Naruto to his attractive daughter after a jovial greeting. "So are we just going to sit around for three days until we arrive in Sea Country then?"

"Nope," Naruto answered simply. "Move the table and chairs over there and make some room. You guys are gonna be training!"

With a sigh of annoyance, Sasuke and Hideaki got to moving the table while Sakura helped with the chairs. When they had finished, they had cleared a decent amount of the clutter in the room and had created for themselves a fairly decent, if slightly cramped training area.

"Now what?" Sakura asked impatiently.

Naruto flipped off the bed gracefully, his Jounin vest long ago discarded by the door before placing his hands in a cross seal and summoning a Shadow Clone.

"You know what to do," Naruto ordered his clone as he disappeared into the bathroom. The three Genin looked at each other warily, but said nothing.

"Alright, Sasuke and Hideaki are going to be sparring over there while Sakura practises her throwing accuracy with those senbon needles," Naruto ordered in an authoritative tone. "Needless to say, no Ninjutsu during the spar; if you get me kicked out of this cabin because you broke something, I'm throwing you overboard and you can walk to Sea Country, are we clear?"

Both boys nodded as Sasuke and Hideaki removed the top halves of their clothes save their mesh undershirts in preparation for a long sparring session. Sasuke may always come out on top during these sparring sessions, being the better at the two at Taijutsu – by a large margin – but Hideaki liked to use them as a means to train his speed and reflexes.

"Um, sensei?" Sakura asked in annoyance. "What will I use to practise on? I doubt the captain of the ship will be very impressed to see holes all over the walls?"

"True!" the Naruto clone exclaimed jovially as the bathroom door opened to reveal the real Naruto clad in nothing but a pair of orange swimming trunks.

Ignoring the two shocked and one highly embarrassed Genin, Naruto walked past the boys and over to the opposite side of the room before flashing through several hand seals and slamming his hands onto the floor.

Much to the Genin's shock, a simple wooden target dummy with indentations for where specific nerves would be on a real human body _grew_ from the floor and only stopped when it was at Naruto's height.

"You two," the real Naruto began, completely oblivious to his students' incredulity, "spar and do as the clone says. Sakura, practise your accuracy until you can hit twenty targets in a row perfectly. Once you can do that consecutively, join the boys for some sparring."

Without so much as another word, Naruto then made his way for the door with a towel he had pilfered from the bathroom.

"W-wait a minute!" Hideaki yelled abruptly, halting Naruto before he could leave. "Where the hell are you going?!"

Naruto then grinned in an all too familiar manner before answering. "Are you kidding me? Did you _see_ the girls in those skimpy little bikinis by the pool on the way up here? No way am I wasting my time in here with you morons when I can be out there admiring the view!"

Sakura closed her eyes and counted backwards from ten before speaking, knowing she would probably say something she'd regret if she didn't. "You're leaving us in here so you can perv on girls, you asshole?!"

Oh well, it seemed the breathing exercise didn't work.

"Yeah," Naruto answered slowly. "There's nothing wrong with a healthy perv, as you can attest to right now." Naruto answered jovially before slamming the door shut and left three stunned Genin in his wake.

Hideaki, getting over his shock, looked over to his pink haired teammate and noticed, much to his surprise, that she was blushing beet red. "You weren't _actually_ checking him out, where you?"

Feeling rather flush after her Sensei had just finished giving her an eyeful, Sakura really couldn't deny the claim. Not that she'd _ever_ admit that out loud, and to Hideaki of all people.

"Of course not, asshole!" she snapped before turning to Sasuke and laughing nervously, "I really wasn't! I'm not a pervert, honest! It doesn't matter that his muscles were really ripped and he looked really hot-oh my god!" horrified, and realising what she was about to say, she slapped her hands over her mouth and ran into the bathroom before slamming the door shut behind her with such force that the windows rattled in their frames.

Hideaki glanced at Sasuke with an incredibly amused expression only to see that he wasn't paying attention at all.

"Do you think she realises I'm still here?" the Naruto clone asked curiously before shaking his head and motioning to the two boys. "You can start whenever you want."

Hideaki hesitated before turning to the clone with a determined expression. "That technique you used before to make that target dummy," he began slowly, motioning to said wooden dummy on the other side of the room. "Was that not a wood element technique?"

"I don't know," Naruto replied with a faux perplexed expression. "It certainly looks like it, doesn't it?"

Annoyed, Hideaki continued. "It most certainly does. I thought only those with the First Hokage's bloodline could use such techniques."

His interest suddenly piqued, Sasuke stopped stretching momentarily and turned his face to the clone, waiting for his answer. The bathroom door was then cracked open ever so slightly as Sakura tried to listen in as well, still refusing to leave the bathroom anytime soon.

"You know of Orochimaru, Konoha's greatest criminal, correct?" Though Sasuke looked like he wanted to disagree – having a different idea of who Konoha's greatest criminal was - he remained silent as Hideaki nodded and the Naruto clone continued. "Well, before any of you were born, he conducted experiments using the First Hokage's DNA to try and imprint his Bloodline Limit onto newborn children. Out of the sixty test subjects, only one of them was successful, he was also the only one to survive."

The three Genin's eyes widened in shock as they pieced together the information to form the obvious conclusion.

"Is that why . . ." Hideaki began reluctantly, however, seeing Naruto's brow risen in curiosity, he felt confident enough to continue. "Is that why people are always glaring at you or trying to avoid you back in Konoha? Because you're the only survivor of Orochimaru's twisted experiments?"

"You're pretty observant to notice something like that," Naruto complimented idly. "If only you'd put as much effort into your training, this wouldn't be necessary."

"Is that how you got your scars?" Sasuke bluntly asked, motioning to the three whisker-like marks on each of Naruto's cheeks.

"You want to know how I got these scars?" Naruto asked humorously as he motioned to his cheeks. "You're about five years too young to know something like that!"

Before either Genin could voice their complaints about being treated like children, the clone loudly clapped his hands to get their attention.

"This isn't the time for twenty questions," he informed them pleasantly. "This is the time for training, so stop slacking and get to it!"

* * *

Mitarashi Anko sat alone at her favourite restaurant with a plate of half-eaten dango and a cup of steaming green tea as she pondered her most recent string of failures concerning a certain blonde haired Jounin.

Truthfully, she was actually starting to get annoyed. It wasn't like her to mope and chase after one man for so long, especially given the fact that she knew very little about him other than the fact that he was an accomplished Seal Master and, until recently, a high-ranking member of the ANBU force.

There was also the _other_ thing, but most adults in Konoha knew about that.

Still, it frustrated her to no end that, despite knowing next to nothing about the man, she couldn't get him out of her mind. He intrigued her like no other and his irrational – and most likely faux – fear of her was nothing short of cute.

"Anko?" a voice asked, suddenly breaking her out of her reverie. "Is that you Anko? What're you doing here eating by yourself?"

Turning towards the owner of the voice, Anko grinned widely when she noticed it was the object of her thoughts' old teammate Uzuki Yugao. What timing!

"Ah, just the person I wanted to see," Anko greeted with a grin as she motioned towards the empty seat opposite her. "You look different. Now, let's see, it's not the hair . . . not the clothes either . . . definitely not the make-up . . . Oh! That's it! The guy that's usually hanging off of you isn't here; I guess that's why I almost didn't recognize you!"

"Oh, ha-ha," Yugao dryly replied with a roll of her eyes as she took the empty seat. "I'm sorry I didn't come over sooner. I almost didn't recognize you sober."

"Me-_ow_, kitty has claws," Anko exclaimed as she swiped with her hand at Yugao and took another bite of her dango. "You've got the night off too then?"

"No, no," she replied absently. "Actually, as of today, I am currently reassigned, in a manner of speaking."

"You quit?" Anko asked with genuine shock. She knew her friend was an ANBU, how could she not? In fact, she'd been one for so long, Anko found it hard to imagine her as anything else. "Why?"

With a sigh and the barest tug of her lips, Yugao answered, "Hayate asked me to. He said he can't stand me constantly doing all those dangerous missions, always worrying whether the next mission will be my last. He can be so sweet when he wants to be, if a little overbearing."

"Yeah, he's a real gem," Anko deadpanned before straightening and grinning widely. "More importantly, I want you to tell me about your old teammate!"

"Which one?" Yugao asked with a raised brow. "And I thought I told you last time that I don't like talking about my old team?"

"I don't give two shits about the Uchiha, I wanna know about Uzumaki," Anko replied greedily. "I've been asking around for ages, but nobody knows anything, or rather, they know, but they just don't wanna talk."

"I thought making people talk was your specialty?" Yugao inquired with a faint hint of a smirk.

"Quit changing the subject. You know I can't torture the information out of Konoha citizens," she grinned before adding, "unfortunately."

Yugao sighed warily as she leaned back in her chair and gave Anko a long, searching look.

"Why do you want to know?" Yugao asked. "Don't think I'm going to tell you just because you asked. I want a genuine reason, one that doesn't involve sex, maiming or pranks."

"Wow, you haven't given me much to work with, have you?" Anko deadpanned before thrusting her dango stick in her companion's direction. "And just so you know, I officially take offence to being labelled some kind of slut."

"You've been singing about how much you want to 'bang' Naruto for the past few weeks," Yugao replied with a deadpan. "In fact, you've done so after having admitted to knowing absolutely nothing about him."

"I was drunk, people do silly things when they've had a bit of alcohol, don't you think?" Anko offered by means of explanation. "Besides, I wouldn't say I know _nothing_ about him. I know some things."

"Like what?" Yugao prompted, crossing her arms expectantly. Anko only smirked in reply before yanking over a nearby waiter by his forearm.

"Yo, waiter boy, I'll have two more plates of dango," Anko demanded of the blushing teenager who quickly scribbled down her order before scurrying away.

Yugao rolled her eyes at his reaction, Anko's exquisite body covered in naught but a loose overcoat – currently hanging on the back of her chair – and an extremely tight fitting mesh suit had that affect on most members of the male species . . . speaking of which.

"By the way, I heard an interesting rumour from an old comrade of mine the other day," Yugao began as the curry she'd ordered before joining Anko's table finally arrived steaming hot.

"Oh? I never took you for a gossip," Anko said in amusement before lounging back in her chair.

"I'm normally not, but this rumour I found particularly interesting, coupled with the fact that the person who told me swears it was true," Yugao said as she paused to eat some of her food; it was delicious, as always. "Could the reason you're interested in Naruto so much have anything to do with what happened after he helped contain your Curse Seal?"

Surprise, anger, or maybe even a little embarrassment were some of the reactions Yugao expected from the woman sitting across from her, definitely not this. For at the very mention of the event Yugao heard a rumour about, Anko began to laugh hysterically.

"Oh man, I know this is gonna be funny," Anko said as she composed herself. "Go on, tell me exactly what you heard, and don't leave out the juicy details."

Slightly unnerved by the way Anko was acting, and having a feeling she knew what the rumour might have been anyway, Yugao continued. "Alright, well, the rumour goes that after Naruto got done fixing your Curse Seal for you, he, well uh, he . . ."

"Played with my breasts and, maybe, suckled on my nipples for a good few minutes?" Anko asked with a wide grin, much to Yugao's shock and embarrassment.

"Not so loud!" Yugao hissed as several people had turned their heads in their table's direction, Anko having not been as subtle as Yugao would have liked when divulging such details. "And yes, though to be honest, he's such a perv that I wasn't _completely_ surprised – but I can't believe you _let_ him! How old was he?"

"Fifteen," Anko recalled with a fond smile. "Good kid, though I don't know why you think so little of him, it never actually happened, though I bet the brat was the one who spread the rumour in the first place."

"I don't think little of him, he's just an annoying . . . wait, what?" Yugao paused, unsure of what Anko had just said.

"I said it never happened," Anko clarified. "Don't get me wrong, I _did_ offer, though mostly to embarrass him. You should have seen his face! He looked like he wanted to pass out _already_ because the procedure required me being topless, but when I pretty much shoved them in his face, well, he passed out."

Yugao was now gaping at Anko in open mouthed shock. She thought she knew, well, _used_ to know Naruto like the back of her hand. From the way he used to act around beautiful women, she would have guessed he would have lavished an opportunity to, well, make a meal of one's breasts. Obviously, she was wrong.

"Yeah, no joke," Anko continued. "Though, I figured he was mostly tired after having completed such a complex sealing ritual, it was still funny as hell. I tried again when he came to but the kid's face just lit up lit up like a light bulb before saying something about having someone he liked . . ."

Anko trailed off mid-sentence as she suddenly locked eyes with the flummoxed Yugao who was still gaping at her. Suddenly, Anko's mind pieced together all the information she had gathered about Naruto before her expression suddenly mirrored Yugao's. It didn't last long for Anko was laughing once again.

Snapping out of her reverie, Yugao frowned at Anko. "And what's so funny?"

"Oh my, this is too much!" Anko erupted into another giggling fit once again before calming down as Yugao continued to glare at her. "He liked _you_!" Anko exclaimed proudly, everything making so much sense now. "No, I reckon he _loved_ you!"

"You don't know what you're talking about," Yugao replied quietly, having been caught off guard by Anko's deduction.

"Oh yes I do, but it gets better!" Anko said with a grin, "I bet the reason why you don't talk anymore is because he _told_ you this, and you chose your sword-boy instead!"

The pained look on Yugao's face said it all.

"Wow, and I thought you were the smart one," Anko said with a shake of her head. "You guys virtually grew up together, fought together and bled together, and you chose Hayate instead? No wonder he avoids you."

"You don't know anything," Yugao denied with a displeased frown as she tried to pontedly ignore the woman sitting accross from her.

"Enlighten me then," she prompted leaning back in her chair with another stick of dango in preparation.

"When Naruto told me how he felt, he was barely _sixteen_ and I was _twenty_. He was still an immature teenager back then, and I was looking for a _man_!" Yugao hissed quietly. Anko found it rather funny how easily Yugao seemed to get her back up when approaching the issue of Naruto. "There's also the issue of him being _four years_ younger than me and _underage_."

"Oh please, that's a weak excuse and you know it," Anko waved her off. "He was only underage if you planned on jumping in the sack with him, and as for being a an immature little pervert, well, which man isn't?"

"Hayate isn't," Yugao defended dryly.

"Then he's gay," Anko said nonchalantly. "By society's definition, any man interested in women would be a pervert. How would they know they find a girl attractive without _looking_ at them first?"

"That's not what I mean when I say pervert," Yugao responded, calming down as Anko's insulting tone subsided. "You weren't on his team, every chance he got he would say the dirtiest thing about Itachi's mother, and he was _thirteen_ at the time when that started. Things only got worse whenever we'd see a pretty girl on a mission."

"So?" Anko asked. "He's a teenager and they were friends, weren't they? Friends, especially guy friends, always tease each other about their mothers. Itachi probably teased him about something else seeing as Naruto was an orphan. Besides, have you _seen_ the woman? Hell, I'm no lesbian, but even _I_ would be tempted."

Yugao wasn't ignorant when it came to Mikoto's beauty, having been envious of the woman's charm herself for the better part of her adolescent life.

Suddenly, Anko got up from her seat and placed a few bills on the table for her meal. "Well, I need to go and get some training done before I go to sleep. Good luck with your new job and all, but I still think you're an idiot for letting go of Naruto, though I guess I should be tanking you as well."

"Oh?" Yugao asked nonchalantly as she had another spoonful of curry. "And why's that? Aside from providing you with some pleasant company?"

"It's so hard to find a decent guy these days," Anko explained with a grin. "It's a good thing you didn't snag him when you had the chance!"

* * *

Sasuke, Sakura and Hideaki trudged over to the front of the cruise ship as per the Naruto clone's orders. Each looked worse for wear, having had trained for the better part of the day non-stop, though each realizing that such harsh training regiments did wonders for their stamina and endurance levels.

Before dispelling itself, the Naruto clone had asked for the trio to head to the pool towards the front of the ship to meet the real Naruto and continue their training.

Suddenly, the sound of bubbling water filled the cool night air as the Genin arrived at the pool area completely devoid of all human life.

"Greetings, my pupils!" Naruto called from above them. Looking over their shoulders, they saw Naruto leaning down over the railing at them with a wide grin. "The spa's awesome, and the women were even better. Too bad you missed it. You ready for some more training?"

"Are you sure you can manage it?" Sakura asked dryly. "You look pretty beat up, maybe you should rest."

"Thanks for the concern Sakura, in fact, I am a little drowsy," he muttered thoughtfully. "A whole afternoon spent in the sun can do that to you, but alas, I believe your training to be more important than my own personal wellbeing!"

"Why did you bring us out here?" Hideaki demanded, sounding rather annoyed. "I've just spent the entire afternoon having the Uchiha run circles around me with the help of his rigged bloodline limit. I'm really not in the mood for your jokes."

A small smirk tugged at Sasuke's lips, much to Naruto's amusement.

"Oh I know," Naruto commented. "My clone told me. I'm a little disappointed though, to be honest. I thought you would have cracked his style by now."

The smirk on Sasuke's face turned into a frown as Hideaki looked even more annoyed.

"Well forgive me for being but a shitty little ninja compared to your greatness, oh mighty Lord Naruto!" Hideaki snapped irritably.

"Well, _someone's_ a little bucket of sass this evening," Naruto commented in amusement. "Let's make a deal then. I'll fight Sasuke in a pure Taijutsu spar, but as a handicap, I won't use _any_ chakra to augment the speed or power of my movements, whereas Sasuke can do anything he likes barring he doesn't damage the ship. Sound fair?"

The Genin all shared a look before – much to Naruto's amusement – they looked up at him with suspicion before grouping up in a huddle to discuss their choice. By the way Sakura was emphatically nodding her head.

"What are the terms?" Sasuke asked from the level below, a confident smirk gracing his features as his Sharingan activated, two black tomoe spinning rapidly in each of his pupils.

"If I win, you folks will train from six in the morning until midnight for the next two nights we are in the ship – no questions asked," he proposed, much to the Genin's horror. "But if you win, I'll do anything, _anything_ you ask," he added, and for effect, winked at Sakura suggestively.

"Kiss – I mean, kick his ass Sasuke!" Sakura hollered angrily, her cheeks flushed in embarrassment at her little slip-up.

"That seems acceptable," Hideaki nodded. "And if you lose Uchiha, you better sleep with one eye open for _the rest of your life_."

"Hn, I won't lose," Sasuke grinned cockily before looking around the pool area curiously. All of the banana lounges were folded up and stacked neatly alone the edges of the area while tables and chairs were completely removed. "What if someone else comes here while we're sparring?"

"They won't," Naruto assured him confidently as he leapt out of the spar, over the railing and onto the wooden deck below before shaking himself – much like a dog – to remove as much water from his body as possible. "This place is off limits in the evenings. Alcohol and night swimming are never a good combination, besides, there's security blocking of all access points to here, and the other pool anyway."

"Then why are you allowed here?" Hideaki asked needlessly.

"Do you even have to ask?" Naruto replied with a cocky grin.

Sasuke, meanwhile, was sizing up his opponent cautiously. Naruto was still only clad in his orange swimming trunks, so that made concealed weapons extremely unlikely. His body, however, caused Sasuke to have second thoughts about his supposed 'easy' victory because while he was forbidden from using Chakra to augment his movements, his body was tightly packed with enough muscle that left Sasuke with no doubt to the damage he could cause if struck correctly.

"Now that you've gotten an eyeful," Naruto gloated cockily as he began to lightly hop on each foot. "Stand back children and be careful, I know Kung-fu."

Eyeing their new Sensei with no hidden amount of incredulity, Hideaki and Sakura backed away to give them some room as Naruto started to make noises eerily similar to those made by actors in cheesy martial arts movies.

"Woooh," Naruto dropped into a fighting stance, his feet spread evenly apart and his open hands pointed at Sasuke. "Whenever you're ready Sasuke, and remember, don't hold back."

"If you lose to this guy," Hideaki began seriously, "I will never speak to you again."

Though Sakura didn't say it, she thought something similar as she looked on in disbelief at Naruto's ridiculous antics.

"You asked for it," Sasuke warned before bending his right knee ever so slightly and turning his body so that it was side on, and his shoulder facing Naruto.

"Ah, the famous Uchiha style," Naruto commented with an old, oriental accent making him sound completely ridiculous. "Such an honour, it is, to fight someone of your obvious skill, you have my thanks."

Sharingan spinning wildly, Sasuke frowned in annoyance before charging at his opponent and preparing a leg sweep. It was a testament to the Uchiha's skill that he was able to move at speeds almost untraceable by the other Genin, though Naruto didn't seem surprised.

In fact, he didn't move until the last possible moment when he quickly hopped over the offending appendage before coming down quickly and slapping Sasuke's across the face.

The bewildered Uchiha performed several backwards flips before coming to a stop several meters away from Naruto with a livid expression; Naruto's slap having done more than enough to bruise his ego.

"Yes, the Uchiha style may be a powerful one, but it is nothing compared to the very ancient, very powerful 'Slap the silly bitch' style," Naruto stated wisely in his accented oriental voice. "You may come at me again whenever you wish."

"Why couldn't my Sharingan track your movements?" Sasuke demanded angrily. "Normally when I fight someone, my Sharingan can read their movements before they make them, but with you, there's nothing. Why is that?"

"Ah, my students, and here we have spotted the one glaring weakness of the Sharingan," Naruto's answer was directed at all three students, but he kept his eyes on Sasuke. "The Sharingan allows the user an incredibly clarity of perception to the point where they can predict an enemy's movements based on muscle movements and chakra."

"Will you stop talking in that stupid voice?" Sakura demanded angrily. "And what the hell are you talking about?"

"Fine, be that way," Naruto huffed in annoyance. "I think I'll leave figuring out what I'm doing up to you three though. Come whenever you're ready Sasuke!"

Dropping into his stance once more, Sasuke charged at Naruto and thrust his right fist at his solar plexus, only for Naruto to dodge it by tilting his body to the side at the last possible moment. Sasuke then followed this up with a series of punches and kicks that were only dodged or knocked away by the blonde Jounin and, much to Sasuke's frustration, not once could he predict his movements, nor sense any usage of Chakra.

Just when Sasuke was about to leap away and rethink his strategy, Naruto dodged his last punch, grabbed onto Sasuke's wrist and twisted it backwards so that it was held high, above his back. Then, using his free hand, Naruto pushed down hard on the back of Sasuke's neck as he held him in submission hold.

"I win," Naruto informed the stunned Genin cheerfully, neither of whom had seen Naruto do anything as impressive as he'd done then. "Now, can anyone tell me how I beat Sasuke's Sharingan so easily?"

Sakura gave Sasuke an apologetic look before answering. "You basically told us how to do it when you explained how its abilities worked," she began quietly. "If the Sharingan can predict movements based on muscle reactions and chakra usage, then all you have to do is . . . nothing until the last possible moment."

Naruto grinned widely at the girl who, upon noticing his state of undress once more and seeing how his muscles flexed when struggled to hold the thrashing Sasuke down, flushed and looked away.

"That's pretty much right," Naruto shrugged. "I don't project any movements for the Sharingan to read because, up until the very last moment, I don't have any. It's entirely reflexive and, well, until Sasuke's Sharingan gets more powerful, there's no way it can track me."

Naruto finally let go of the struggling Uchiha who glared up at him angrily.

"How do you know so much about the Sharingan?" Sasuke demanded angrily. "The only way you could possibly know so much is if you are in possession of our family scrolls, which you aren't because the village has them in storage, or if you had an Uchiha teach you."

Naruto looked at Sasuke with a raised brow, "Well yeah, I _was_ in the same squad as your brother for, like, seven years? I tended to pick up a few things . . ."

Seeing the Genin's shocked expressions – one that was much more pronounced on Sasuke's face – Naruto chuckled nervously.

"Oh wow, you didn't know that?" he asked incredulously. "I thought _that_ was why you seemed to hate me so much . . . well, this is awkward."

Suddenly, and without warning, Sasuke turned around and stormed off in the direction of their room, leaving Naruto, Sakura and Hideaki behind.

"You guys better go back and make sure he gets to bed early," Naruto shooed them off with a gesture of his hands. "You've all got to wake up bright and early tomorrow, after all!"

Grumbling, Sakura and Hideaki stalked off after Sasuke leaving Naruto alone in the pool area. Without so much as another word, Naruto leapt back up to the spa and sighed as he let himself sink into the comfortably warm water.

"Did you really need to be so hard on them?" A voice suddenly asked from over Naruto's shoulder as the blonde dunked his head and resurfaced.

Looking over his shoulder, Naruto grinned as he pat the talking toad on the head. The toad was a bright red and no larger than a small backpack. He also wore a dark blue Haori that hung open as it lounged on its back, its slimy hand barely touching the water.

"I needed to beat some humility into the Uchiha Gamakichi, I'm sure you noticed him being far too cocky for his own good," Naruto chuckled as the toad leapt into the spa and begun to swim around on his back.

"Like you do?" Gamakichi commented dryly as Naruto splashed him and laughed.

"Your old man beat some humility into me when I was younger, unfortunately, I don't think he'd be so willing to do so for a non-summoner," Naruto pointed out as he had a splashing war with the small toad.

"True, true," Gamakichi commented before leaping out of the water and onto Naruto's towel to laze about again. "And he beat you good, I remember . . . good times."

"Do you _want_ to go back then?" Naruto asked with a grin as the toad emphatically shook his head in the negative. "Good boy, here, have a treat."

The toad ripped the flying piece of candy from the air with his tongue, either not noticing, or caring that he was being patronized by his summoner.

"So are you really going to train them for that long like you said you would?" the toad asked as Naruto snorted in amusement.

"Hell no," he shook his head. "I'll have a clone do it, what the hell do you think this is?"

"You're their sensei," the toad pointed out idly. "_You're_ supposed to teach them, so you should stop slacking."

Dunking his head once again in the water, Naruto emerged only to flick the annoyed toad in the forehead.

"Sometimes, Gamakichi, you say the _meanest_ things."

A/N: Unbetad and a little rushed. Next chapter will have Naruto actually fighting and not just slapping around his students. Also, Anko will be talking to several other people like she did in this chapter with Yugao as you'll slowly get a picture of what Naruto's personality is _truly_ like, and not what it appears to be.


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

She hated it when Naruto was away on a mission.

Mikoto would never admit it out loud – mainly because she'd never hear the end of it – but she'd grown so accustomed to Naruto's presence in her life that she found she had little else to do with her spare time that didn't involve the young man in some way.

Whether it be a pleasant chat out by the fish pond in her garden, or just some much needed company when she was feeling lonely, she could always count on Naruto to breathe some much needed life into her dull existence.

True to form, with no company this evening, Mikoto found she didn't know what to do to pass the time. She had contemplated going into town and seeing what Konoha had to offer in ways of night-time entertainment before immediately trashing the idea. The only thing more depressing than realising she relied on an eighteen-year-old for entertainment was being constantly reminded of the fact by the young and happy party-goers she'd no doubt encounter should she venture out.

With an uncharacteristically girlish giggle, Mikoto wondered what it'd be like to throw all caution to the wind and waltz into town on a certain blonde brat's arm, smirking provocatively at the men that would ogle her and grinning superiorly at the women who'd glare jealously.

Oh well, if only she were ten years younger.

Shuffling over to the oven as a pleasant aroma began to pervade the air, Mikoto hunched over and peered through the foggy glass at the cake reaching completion inside.

No, she couldn't go out and paint the town red with her more than willing 'partner in crime' – despite how much the thought caused her to giggle like a prepubescent girl. So instead, she'd be content with baking cakes and attending to her garden to pass the time.

Sighing, Mikoto reached over to the egg timer and set it for five minutes before resting her hands on her hips and staring at the oven sourly.

"God, I'm so pathetic," she exclaimed warily before moving over to the drawer in which she kept her oven mitts. "What happened to my life?"

_That_ was a rhetoric question if she'd ever heard one.

Pausing in her wiping down of the bench, she reconsidered the question. It wasn't as clear-cut as she originally thought. Sure, before that horrid night which seemed like an eternity ago now, she may have had little in the way of spare time on her hands, but that didn't necessarily mean she was happy with her life.

Then again, she mused, it probably had little to do with her monotonous life as a house wife, and more to do with the absence of a certain someone.

Mikoto's back suddenly stiffened as she felt a slight change in the air. She'd grown so accustomed to the feeling over time that she was hardly surprised by it anymore.

Discreetly sending Chakra to her eyes and activating her Sharingan, Mikoto slowly turned to eye the four ninja suddenly crowding her kitchen with a raised brow. They were each dressed in civilian clothing and had no weapons to speak of, but she knew they were ninja. Having lived around ninja for her entire life, she could easily tell if a person was a ninja by their stance alone, especially if they telegraphed the fact like these four did.

That, and who else would be stupid enough to enter her house uninvited?

Mikoto herself, tensed. Just because they weren't carrying any weapons of note didn't make them any less dangerous. Ninja – especially ones trained for assassination – were trained to kill. To think that elite ninja were restricted to using weapons to kill was foolish, naïve, and a mistake that had almost cost Mikoto her life the first time this happened.

"We were not informed that the target had a fully matured Sharingan," the leader, Mikoto guessed, observed curiously as they each moved to surround her while blocking any means of escape. "This is indeed interesting and certainly merits report."

"Pfft," one of the man's subordinates scoffed arrogantly. "A house-wife, Sharingan or not, is still just a house-wife. Let's get this over with."

"Pretty arrogant, aren't we?" Mikoto observed idly as she crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the kitchen counter with an air of indifference. "Do you honestly think this is the first assassination attempt I've had the displeasure of encountering?"

"The first of which at the hand of your son, no less," the only woman of the group pointed out coldly. As much as she tried to resist, Mikoto couldn't help flinching; Touché.

Sighing once again, Mikoto looked up before speaking, "Get it over with."

"I thank you for not resisting," the leader said gratefully. "This is nothing personal, I hope -"

"I wasn't talking to you," Mikoto interrupted with narrowed eyes, her Sharingan still spinning madly as she addressed the assassins. "You four were finished the moment you entered my home."

The woman frowned before grabbing one of the kitchen knives on the bench beside her and launching it at Mikoto. Though her Sharingan could easily track the fast-moving projectile, she knew she had no reason to deflect it.

A yellow blob descended from the ceiling and landed before Mikoto, obscuring her form the assassins' visions, before batting away the knife with one of its leathery hands. The yellow blob revealed itself to be a toad easily the size of a fully grown adult male with yellow skin and clad in a karate gi.

So shocked were the assassins by the appearance of a human-sized toad that they were caught by surprise when a large scimitar pierced the heart of the, up until now, silent assassin.

"Toads?!" the arrogant assassin bellowed incredulously as the yellow toad before them charged.

The leader of the group spun around to find the source of the scimitar that had pierced his comrade, only to find an empty kitchen.

"Take care of the frog," he instructed brusquely as he gave chase to the murderer of his comrade.

"Your best chance was to run when you had the chance," the 'frog' informed them stoically as he dropped into a Taijutsu stance with his leathery hands and feet evenly spread.

"If Jiraiya of the Sannin is around, we're in trouble," the woman informed her arrogant comrade in a troubled tone as her other comrade bled out on the floor. "We are not equipped to handle such a foe."

Their opponent smirked, apparently in on a joke they had no idea about. "Perhaps you should deal with me before worrying about future opponents, hmm?"

The woman threw the basket of apples on the kitchen bench at the toad's large face before quickly flashing through sand heals in preparation for a technique.

"No time!" her comrade warned as the toad was on them in an instant, covering the short distance between them before the woman could complete her technique. Landing in a crouch between the two, the toad punched the man with his left hand and kicked out at the woman with his right leg.

The man was sent tumbling into the living room from the force of the punch as the woman nimbly dodged and countered with a series of kicks that were all aimed at what she assumed were weak points on a toad's body. She only hoped that, while this creature was obviously a toad, that it shared some similarities, other than its size, with humans.

Unfortunately for her, the toad expertly blocked every kick until he found an opening in her defence and used it to push her off balance as the woman's comrade finally rejoined the fight by throwing an expensive looking lamp at the toad's unprotected back.

Spinning quickly, the toad caught the lamp and set it down carefully on the nearby table as an enemy closed in on each side with intend to kill. As they neared, the toad deflected both of their strikes away from his body and continued to do so as they both released a flurry of punches that were almost impossible to detect with the naked eye.

As one of the man's speedy punches were sent past and behind his target's head, the toad quickly placed its large leathery hand on the back of his neck and pushed down hard, trapping the appendage in place and forcing him into a painfully submissive position.

The toad then sent a powerful kick towards the woman who crossed her arms and attempted to block the strike, only to be sent flying backwards several feet for her efforts. He then delivered a series of solid punches to the trapped man's face before pushing him firmly down onto the ground and rolling over his back. Being that the man's arm was still trapped, the roll caused his arm to snap like a twig, earning a howl of pain from the unfortunate assassin.

The woman, having finally regained her bearings and angered by her teammate's defeat, charged at the toad and delivered a flying kick aimed at the creature's face. The toad easily hooked its large arm under her leg, caught her, and threw her to the ground before delivering a stomp to her face that would have easily snapped her neck had she not exploded in a cloud of smoke, revealing only one of the kitchen stools in her place.

Turning quickly, knowing exactly which stool the woman had used to replace herself with, the toad leapt through the air and spun sideways in the assassin's direction as she hurled every sharp implement in the kitchen she could reach at him with deadly accuracy.

The nubile amphibian dodged every makeshift weapon save for two, which grazed his cheek and shoulder respectfully, before landing in the woman's immediate personal space and delivering over a dozen lightning quick punches to her torso. The punches followed her slow decent to the ground until she was lying on her back and looking up at the toad in defeat.

Through the haze of pain, the woman idly wondered it was a hail of boulders, and not an oversized toad, that was delivering the punches - it certainly felt that way.

The toad had orders however, and thus, was not done. Continuing his flurry of punches, he made sure to deliver several to her face as well as her severely damaged torso as the woman had little choice but to pass out, unconsciousness a blissful escape from the pain.

The toad left the woman bruised and bleeding on the floor as the remaining assassin, unable to use one of his arms, charged at him with a kitchen knife held in a reverse grip in a desperate attempt to end the fight.

Easily dodging the wild stab, the toad delivered a solid punch to his abdomen, followed by a quick chop to the back of the assassin's neck before spinning around and trapping him in an over-the-shoulder headlock.

Before the assassin could even think to use a Replacement Technique to escape, the toad spun around once more, headlock still in place, causing the man to spin also and end up between the toad's long legs.

His face stoic, the toad gave the assassin the same treatment he gave his comrade by delivering five powerful punches to his face, each of which striking with the force of a jackhammer, before he too, passed out from the pain and damage to his head.

The sound of the toad's deep breathing was the only thing audible in the messed kitchen until Mikoto stormed back in, an annoyed frown on her face.

"Why must they always make such a mess?" she fumed, her Sharingan long deactivated as she sought to picking up all the utensils-turned-weapons from the floor.

The toad dropped down beside her and aided Mikoto in her task as he chuckled sheepishly, "I tried to minimize the damage to your home, just as the boss requested, Mrs. Uchiha. I apologize."

Letting out a frustrated sigh, she waved him off and continued the conversation as if speaking with a talking toad the size of a human was a normal thing. "Don't worry, you did fine. Thank-you for saving that lamp by the way, it was a gift from my mother."

"I'm aware," the toad gave a smirk with its wide lips. "The boss specifically pointed out that nothing is to be damaged less we be forced to spar with him when he returns."

"That doesn't sound so bad," Mikoto frowned as the toad visibly shivered.

"You can say that because you have not sparred with him," he pointed out as he stood and tightened his gi. "I assure you, it is something I tend to try and avoid at all costs. It ends up being little to do with sparring, and more to do with a beat-down."

"I've seen you fight Gamarokku, surely it can't be that bad," Mikoto reasoned as the last of her expensive knives were put away where they belonged.

"My grandfather has taught many of my family the Toad Fist Style, refusing to even _consider_ teaching outsiders for as long as I could remember," the newly dubbed Gamarokku began nostalgically. Mikoto, not having heard this story before, listened intently as the egg-timer finally went off. "That all changed when Uzumaki Naruto arrived at Mount Myobokuzan and demanded to see the Toad Sage. Such impudence would normally mean instant death, but the Master Sage only laughed and demanded he fight my grandfather to prove his worth."

Mikoto gaped at Gamarokku incredulously. "Naruto didn't start summoning Toads until he was fourteen . . . are you telling me a fourteen year old stormed into the home of all Toads and demanded something of their _leader_?!"

Gamarokku chuckled before nodding. "Toads of all sizes and ages came to watch the fight between grandfather and Naruto. It lasted for many hours with both side giving it their all and not holding back even one iota. Each had a point to prove, and neither would budge an inch."

"What happened then?" Mikoto asked in amazement. It was incredibly rare for Naruto to even _mention_ anything about his past. To have a detailed story such as this told to her was both amazing and incredibly intriguing.

"They both passed out from exhaustion with grins on their faces," Gamarokku informed the woman with a smirk. "Naruto is the only human grandfather has ever respected, and, thus, is the only human to ever train with him."

"So Naruto knows the Toad Fist Style too?" Mikoto inquired as she removed her cake from the oven and winced when she heard a small explosion outside. "If that moron damages my garden, he's not getting _any_ cake."

Grinning, Gamarokku shook his head before continuing, "_Know_ the Toad Fist Style? The boy mastered it and incorporated it into his own style in only a year, so I suppose that would be an accurate assessment . . ."

Shaking her head in amazement, Mikoto grit her teeth in annoyance when another explosion shook her house to its very foundations. Ripping open her window, she leaned out and hollered at the scimitar wielding, haori clad toad in her backyard squaring off against a panting and severely bleeding assassin.

"Gamakishin, I swear to god, if you destroy my garden I will chop of your legs, cook them, and _feed them to you!_"

Visibly shivering, the bright orange toad turned and chuckled nervously at her before turning back and rushing at his opponent, his large scimitars ready to slice him in half. The assassin quickly replaced himself with one of Mikoto's pots and attempted to escape, but before he could even regain his bearings after using his technique, he was run through with two large swords.

Looking into the yellow eyes of his killer, the assassin felt the cold arms of death slowly begin to drag him into the underworld as his life slowly begun to fade away.

"You never had a chance, fool," the toad spat as he removed his swords and decapitated his opponent as he fell to his knees, the swords no longer supporting the man's weight.

Following the delicious scent of Mikoto's freshly baked cake, Gamakishin replaced his swords on his back and carefully re-entered the kitchen.

"Hey guys, you miss me?" The orange toad asked jovially.

"You know the boss' orders," Gamarokku pointed out dryly as he devoured the piece of cake Mikoto had given him gratefully. "He will not be pleased that you turned Mrs. Uchiha's garden into a battlefield."

"In all fairness, it was the assassin who did that," the toad pointed out unhelpfully. "I minimized damage where possible!"

Gamarokku looked over the seething Mikoto's shoulder to see several of her flower beds still smouldering from when some fire attack must have hit them.

"Could you not have used your water techniques to stop any flames from destroying the garden?" Gamarokku asked with a raised brow. "Or better yet, not let him use any techniques at all?"

Gamakishin chuckled nervously once again as Mikoto rounded on him with a murderous glint in her eyes, "He was better than I thought! I'm _very _sorry Mrs. Uchiha! I didn't mean it! And, well, if I used water techniques, I'd have had to drop my swords . . . and . . . well . . . I don't like dropping my swords . . ."

Realizing he was just digging his own grave, the orange toad tried to discreetly make his exit. As he passed by Mikoto's freshly baked cake however, he tried to snag a piece with his long tongue, only to scream in pain when Gamarokku slammed his tongue into the bench with his large, leathery hand, stopping it from obtaining its prize and, most likely, covering the cake in slobber.

"No cake for you."

* * *

Hideaki slapped his forearm once again as another mosquito tried to suck some of his blood. They had been travelling for a few hours after disembarking from the cruise ship once arriving at Haha Island.

Upon arrival, the captain had been kind enough to give them directions to the village where they would find their client. Unfortunately, as Hideaki was now finding out, the road cut through a jungle that was filled with all manner of creatures that made the journey unpleasant.

The incredibly hot and muggy weather wasn't really helping matters.

"Are we nearly there?" Hideaki asked warily. "We've been travelling through this jungle all day and I don't see a way out anywhere soon."

Letting out a frustrated groan, Naruto reached into his pocket and pulled out a rolled up wad of cash before tossing it at Sakura. The girl was grinning smugly as she counted her money while Sasuke and Hideaki looked on in confusion.

"You should never bet against Sasuke," Sakura advised sagely. "You'll always lose."

"Oh come on!" Naruto exclaimed angrily. "If he weren't still so pissed off, he'd have complained about the weather making his hair frizz ages ago!"

Sasuke, walking in the back of the group, took a quick moment to smooth out his hair while nobody was looking.

"You still lost; Hideaki was the first to complain!" Sakura pointed out smugly as she pocketed the cash.

"Don't worry," Naruto assured her with a smug grin of his own, "I'll get that back with interest by the time we're back in Konoha."

"You just can't lose gracefully, can you?" Sakura asked with fake disappointment. "Oh well, this is payback for not letting me use the pool back on the ship."

"And somehow, I still feel like the one better off," Naruto pointed out smugly. It was Sakura's turn to grumble sourly.

"Err . . . Hello?" Hideaki jogged ahead of them and interrupted the two with a wave of his hand. "I'm so sorry to intrude on the _moment_ you two seem to be having, but I asked a question."

"Are you afraid of heights?" Naruto suddenly countered, completely throwing off the Fire Lord's son.

"What has _that_ got to do with anything?" Hideaki asked crossly.

"Well, your answer will adversely affect the answer to mine," Naruto pointed out slowly as the group came to a stop. Realizing that Naruto was asking the entire group, and not just Hideaki, each Genin shrugged and answered in the negative.

Fishing into his backpack, Naruto retrieved a map and a compass before beginning to examine both while whistling a merry tune.

"So, this shitty map has no scale," Naruto pointed out merrily as he crouched and placed the map on the ground. "How far do you think the village is away from our position?"

The Genin all approached the map and took turns in discerning the distance for themselves after Naruto pointed out their general current position.

"Looks like thirty kilometres to me," Sakura pointed out with a shrug as Naruto rolled up the map and replaced it in his bag. "That'll take us hours if we keep walking like this!"

Naruto shrugged nonchalantly, "It'd take a lot less time if you babies stopped whining and started running again."

"We've been training non-stop for the past two days!" Hideaki protested incredulously. "Forgive us for not having an unlimited amount of stamina."

"You're forgiven," Naruto shrugged as he held up three fingers. "We have three options here: Option one is to keep walking and get there by midnight. Option two involves you three to stop being babies and start running, and we'll probably be there within the hour. Option three, however, is the reason for my question about heights, but we'll be there in five minutes."

It was a no-brainer, as far as the Genin were concerned.

"Whatever, anything that gets us out of this forest as quickly as possible," Hideaki said while his teammates nodded in agreement.

"Alright," Naruto relented as he approached the Genin. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Warn us? Warn us about wh-hey!" Hideaki was cut off when Naruto unceremoniously picked both boys up and carried them like sacks of potatoes before motioning for Sakura to take his back.

"You're gonna want to stop struggling," Naruto pointed out as the girl warily approached her temporary sensei and mounted his back. "You don't want me to _accidently_ let you slip with option three."

"What are you -?" Before Hideaki could finish his question, Naruto crouched low, gathering a massive amount of Chakra in his legs, before leaping.

Neither Genin was ashamed to admit that they screamed their lungs out when they realized they weren't landing anytime soon. The nearby scenery passed by in a blur as the quartet soared through the air at high speeds.

"What the hell is happening?" Sakura screamed over the roar of the wind. Her face was buried into her sensei's back as she clung on for dear life. All she received in terms of response though was a boisterous laughter barely audible over the howling wind as they continued to fly through the air.

When they finally started to descend, the Genin's screams began anew as the ground began to rapidly approach. With a thunderous crash, Naruto landed in a crouch as a large crater formed around his landing site, a result of the force of his landing.

Before either Genin could comprehend what had just happened, Naruto was off again with another monstrous leap, blissfully ignoring their screamed protests.

Several leaps later, and after the Genin had screamed their throats raw, Naruto grinned as the ocean's calm surface, and not the ground, looked to be their final landing site.

He wasn't the only one who noticed.

The Genin had their eyes screwed shut as the surface of the water came closer and closer. No doubt expecting to crash into the crystal blue water with the force of a cannonball, they were rightfully surprised when, instead, they were showered with a powerful spray of water, but not submerged upon his landing.

Slowly opening his eyes, Hideaki yelped when he noticed his face was being held barely a foot above the surface of the ocean. His reflection stared back at him with a blank look for several moments before he looked up at his grinning sensei, eyebrow twitching in annoyance.

"What the fuck was that?!"

"My, my, such improper language for royalty," Naruto exclaimed with a mocking tone. "What _would_ your parents think?"

"How are you doing that?" Sasuke calmly asked as his Sharingan stared intently at Naruto's feet. The Jounin was standing atop the surface of the water like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Naruto pondered his answer before grinning down at the two boys still being held under his arms. Both boys sighed in unison, knowing that grin promised nothing fun in the foreseeable future.

"I'll tell you what," Naruto began, adjusting the shocked silent Sakura on his back as she began to cling around his throat a little too tightly. "The first one of you back to shore gets to learn the mysterious and highly valued art of water walking!"

Before either could even utter a protest, Naruto unceremoniously dumped the both of them into the water before skipping off merrily towards the shore.

Resurfacing quickly and taking several gasps of air, both boys floated in place for several moments before fully comprehending the situation. Slowly turning around so they were now facing the shore – which looked to be roughly one hundred meters away – and the retreating back of their idiot sensei, they glared at each other out of the corner of their eyes before facing the shore once again.

"I'm not gonna lose," Hideaki pointed out firmly.

"Hn," Sasuke grunted, not deeming the challenge worthy of a verbal response.

"Regardless of what happens though," Hideaki began, now facing Sasuke fully. "Are we in agreement that we've got to get him back for this?"

Sasuke smirked in response, "Agreed."

Without so much as a warning, Sasuke took off towards the shore like a rocket. Temporary alliance against Naruto aside, he would _not_ lose.

"Get back here cheater!"

* * *

"This is a good apple," Naruto commented idly as he bit into the crunchy fruit with Sakura following closely behind him. "Want a bite?"

"I don't want a bite of your apple!" Sakura exclaimed for what she felt was the hundredth time.

"Your loss," he shrugged nonchalantly. "You really should though, it's really good."

Eager to change the subject before she kicked something, _anything_ nearby out of sheer frustration, Sakura remembered their earlier method of transportation.

"How did you leap so far before?" she asked her sensei. "I know you had to have put chakra in your legs, but no one should be able to jump that far with just applying chakra to their legs."

"That's because I didn't _just_ apply chakra to my legs, obviously," Naruto pointed out bluntly, ignoring Sakura's annoyed expression in favour of another apple. "_Man_ these apples are good. You think the weather wouldn't suit growing them; goes to show what I know about fruit."

"What _did_ you do then?" Sakura asked as patiently as she could. Talking to Naruto felt like talking to a toddler sometimes, as she constantly reminded herself not to snap at him, he was retarded, after all. He had to be.

"That's a secret," Naruto informed her with a grin. "Besides, even if I told you, you couldn't do it."

"How do you know unless you tell me?" Sakura attempted to coax the answer out of him, only to frown when Naruto let out a loud guffaw.

"You are _way_ too underdeveloped to even come _close_ to being efficient with that approach," Naruto informed her in amusement. "Come back when you're a 'B' plus and have a nice, round ass – excuse me sir, could you tell me where I could fine Mrs. Nojima?"

Sakura's face flushed in indignation and humiliation at her sensei's callous remark. She was beginning to like him less and less as the days went on.

The man Naruto had asked for direction, a bartender resting against the counter of his outdoor bar, gave them some easy to follow directions as Sasuke and Hideaki caught up with them, panting and soaked to the core.

"Oh you two finally made it did you?" Naruto asked uninterestedly as the boys glared at each other. "Took you long enough."

"Being fully clothed and still wearing a backpack will do that to you," Hideaki pointed out sourly as Naruto chuckled.

"Fair enough, and who won?"

"I did!" both boys shouted in unison before resuming their glaring contest.

"I won by a clear meter!" Sasuke countered challengingly as he continued to glare at his teammate.

"You had a _ten meter_ head start!" Hideaki countered fiercely.

"Calm down Hideaki, there's no shame in losing to someone like Sasuke," Sakura pointed out in a tone that she must have assumed to be diplomatic, much to Naruto's amusement.

"If I wanted a one-sided and uninformed opinion, I would have _asked_ you, fan-girl!" Hideaki snapped.

"I think you should listen to the 'so called' fan-girl," Sasuke pointed out sagely. "She seems to know what she's talking about."

"She didn't even see the race you idiot!"

"Oh well, it looks like I'm going to have to teach you all the water walking technique," Naruto exclaimed with a sigh, only for his eyes to widen comically when his three Genin spun in his direction angrily.

"Shut up!" they shouted, as Naruto did so.

"Well!" Naruto exclaimed to himself as he took another bite of his apple. "That was just _rude_."

It took them another ten minutes to make it to the client's house. It was a modest, two-story home that was a carbon-copy of every other house on the street. The only thing separating the house from the sand of the beach was the small road that led right back to the marketplace from whence they had came.

Naruto admired the sunset as he knocked on the client's door. The large orange sun was slowly disappearing over the horizon to the west and cast an impressive orange glow over the ocean that caused it to sparkle like a sea of diamonds.

"Talk about location," Naruto breathed out quietly, as the Genin followed his line of sight and shared his sentiments.

"Daddy!" a young girl who couldn't have been older than three opened the door and greeted them with a large, radiant smile. She had light brown hair that was tied up in two pig-tails and dressed in a yellow summer-dress. Her smile suddenly dimmed when she saw Naruto and the Genin standing at the door and looking at her with bewildered expressions. "You're not daddy . . ."

Her lips and chubby cheeks trembling as tears gathered in her eyes, the little girl slammed the door shut and re-entered her house.

"Phew," Naruto exclaimed with a sigh of relief and a nervous chuckle. "Thank god for _that_, she scared the shit out of me!"

The door opened again to reveal an apologetic woman, obviously the girl's mother, who smiled at them and ushered the ninja in. She was extremely pretty with short brown hair tied in a pony-tail and a beautiful smile. The obvious signs of depression, however, stopped any ideas Naruto had of flirting in their tracks as he entered the woman's home.

"I'm sorry for that," she apologized as she ushered the ninja inside. "Mikan really misses her daddy; she's been incredibly depressed since . . . since his disappearance."

"It's fine, no harm done," Naruto assured her gently with a smile. "I take no offence to being mistaken as such a beautiful little girl's father, regardless the reasoning behind it."

Said girl was hiding behind her mother's leg shyly as Naruto directed his smile to her. Mikan was glaring at Naruto defiantly for having the audacity to not be her daddy when he'd knocked.

"Hey Mikan, want to see a magic trick?" Naruto asked the glaring girl with a charming smile. The Genin watched with fascination, already shocked by their sensei's unusually tame and charming behaviour, as he reached into one of his rear packs and pulled out a single seed.

The little girl looked up to her mother as if asking for permission or assurance. The woman nodded and motioned her towards the Jounin who showed her a pair of empty hands before smiling and cupping his hands before her eyes.

"Do you like flowers?" he asked her conspiratorially. The plastic flower hair-ties in her hair already held the answer to Naruto's question, but he still asked for effect.

Shyly nodding in acquiescence, everyone in the room, especially Mikan, gasped as a small vine with a sealed bud on its end wormed its way through the small gap in his cupped hands and grew upwards until it was at the girl's eye level.

"Oh-oh, it stopped growing," Naruto exclaimed in faux alarm. "Quick Mikan, blow on it before it withers!"

Gasping and eyes wide, the little girl hurriedly blew on the bud and, much to the shock of those in the room, a beautiful orange and red flower blossomed from the bud right before their eyes.

Eyes wide, Mikan reached out to the flower, scared to touch it and eyeing Naruto warily.

"Go on, you can touch it," Naruto encouraged her. "It's yours, after all."

Eyes wide and a wide smile on her face, Mikan gently pried the flower from Naruto's cupped hand with her pudgy fingers and held it to her chest in wonder.

"You might want to plant it or put it in some water quickly before it wilts and dies," Naruto advised the little girl sagely who nodded and turned her large puppy-dog eyes onto her mother in askance. The woman chuckled before taking her hand and leading her to the stairs.

"Alright, but it's bedtime for you," she warned her child. "I'll put it in some water and you can see it tomorrow if you're good, okay?"

Nodding, she handed the flower to her mother before scrambling up the stairs, a wide smile now replacing the frown that had marred her face only moments before.

"Sorry, I'll put her to bed and be right back," the woman called over her shoulder as she ascended the stairs after her child.

When both were well and truly out of ear-shot, Hideaki felt safe to voice his thoughts.

"What the _fuck_ was that?!" he whispered harshly.

"What?" Naruto countered innocently, the look not working at _all_ on him.

"You know damn well _what_ mister Magician!" Sakura exclaimed in an accusatory tone. "What the _fuck_ was that?!"

"Oh dear," Naruto sighed melodramatically, a small grin tugging at his lips. "I'm having a bad influence on you all."

A/N: I figured this was a good point to cut off the chapter. I'll be finishing this mission in the next one most likely, and you'll get to see Naruto fighting properly for the first time in this story.

I enjoyed writing the fight scene with the with the Wing Chun toad in the beginning, however, words don't do what I saw in my mind justice. YouTube 'Ip man' and look for the fight scene with Yip fighting off ten black-belts to see some of the moves I wrote about, it's awesome.

I didn't go into detail on Gamakishin's fight because I thought the scene had gone on for long enough as it was.

Once again unbetad, and my beta seems to be really busy as of late. So if you want to volunteer, I'll take a second. Leave a review, or PM or something.

There's a poll on my profile page concerning my next story, check it out and give me some feedback on that too.


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

Naruto lay on the beach barely a stone's throw away from his client's, gazing into the sparkling heavens above. A lack of artificial light on this side of the island made the night sky light up even more beautifully than it did back in Konoha, a feat he knew not to be impossible, but rare, nonetheless.

In his career as a ninja, Naruto had seen many beautiful places. From the frosted peaks and valleys of Snow Country to the beautiful and abundant flora of Grass Country, he'd been sent all over the elemental nations and could claim that he'd pretty much seen it all.

One would now understand that claiming this small village as magnificent was no small compliment for the seasoned Ninja. Houses on a beach covered in soft white sand, a rich green jungle surrounding their village, a close-knit community that helped each other out and breathtaking sunsets that caused the ocean to look like an endless sea of glittering jewels.

Such a beautiful place should not be plagued with issues such as the like he was sent here for – it just wasn't right.

A loud splash interrupted Naruto from his silent musings as Sasuke plunged into the ocean he was trying to stand atop of.

"Water is not like the surface of a tree Sasuke." Naruto chided wearily without looking to the three struggling Genin. "Water is constantly moving, so your chakra application to your feet must constantly change to mirror its nature . . . otherwise, you'll just fall."

"How did you know it was Sasuke who fell?" Sakura asked with a frown as she struggled to remain above the surface of the water. She'd currently managed to stop sinking once the water reached her knees, but nothing better. "You're not even watching!"

Sasuke seemed equally annoyed by Naruto's continuing – and correct – assumption of him falling into the water. This wasn't the first time he'd called it right.

"I don't need to watch," he said nonchalantly. "I can tell exactly what's happening right now just by knowing the little I do about you."

"What are you - ?" Sakura began to ask only to be cut off by Naruto.

"Sakura has the best Chakra control, but the least reserves." Naruto began automatically as he held up a single finger for the Genin to see. "She'll be the first to master the technique, but once she does, she'll find she pretty much exhausts her reserves after fifteen to twenty minutes of constant use. Sounds fine, as most ninja fights don't last that long, but don't forget to take into account the other things you use Chakra for during a fight, and then it seems rather abysmal."

Sakura had nothing to say after the blunt and glaringly true assessment. She had almost mastered the exercise, but after only ten minutes of practise, she could already feel the first signs of exhaustion claiming her.

Naruto then held up a second finger before continuing. "Sasuke has the most reserves, which makes controlling Chakra the way it is necessary for this exercise hardest for him. He'll take the longest to tire, but he'll probably be the last to get it down unless he uses his Sharingan – which I forbid by the way. Don't even try it; it's not worth you getting your ass beat over."

The boy mentioned merely glared at the blonde as he steadily expelled chakra from his feet and begun the training anew.

Holding up a third finger, Naruto proceeded with the third and final assessment. "Finally, Hideaki may have a lower Chakra capacity than Sasuke, but he also has a fair bit more than Sakura. He'll find the control aspect of expelling Chakra into a constantly moving substance easier, and he'll take longer to tire. Therefore, he'll be the second to master the exercise, but the first to do so and be able to use it with any real efficiency . . . and down goes Sasuke again."

Surprised, Sakura and Hideaki watched as Sasuke wobbled uncontrollably before falling straight back into the water. Hideaki and Sakura then turned to their still star-gazing sensei with frowns.

"I hate it when he does that," Hideaki mumbled to an equally troubled Sakura.

She agreed. "There's something about him being right that just pisses me off."

"Maybe you should channel that temper into something more useful then?" Naruto asked as he sat up on his elbows and grinned. "Like training, perhaps? Just because you almost have the technique, doesn't mean you can slack – you shouldn't even slack when you have it down. The more you do it, the more your Chakra reserves will grow."

"Asshole," muttered the pink haired girl under her breath as she discreetly glared daggers at him.

Returning her focus back to the matter at hand – her feet and the chakra being expelled from them – Sakura missed the small seashell sailing in her direction until it was too late. Impacting with her rather large forehead, the girl shrieked in surprise before losing her concentration and falling into the water for the first time since starting the training exercise.

The girl slowly trudged out of the ocean and made her way towards Naruto, fists clenched and teeth grinding like a chainsaw.

"Oops?" The Jounin replied insincerely without even looking up at her. "If you can't focus on two things at once, what use will the Water Walking technique be to you?"

Sakura closed her eyes, took several deep breaths to calm herself, before returning to the water and resuming her training.

She needed to get a lot stronger if she wanted to make good on the promise she had made herself back on the cruise ship.

The promise to beat the shit out of the insufferable blonde.

Needless to say, she had a long journey ahead of her.

"Looks like they're training hard," their client said softly as she approached the lounging Naruto and took a seat beside him. She watched as the Genin tried to stay afloat on the surface of the water in fascination while Naruto remained silent and allowed her to speak. "Are all children – I mean ninja their age taught techniques like this?"

"Pretty much." Naruto confirmed with an indifferent shrug. "Some older, some younger, it all depends on the ninja really. The technique becomes really useful when they're given missions where the battleground could just as easily be a lake, than it could be a forest."

"I see," the woman whispered quietly as she watched the Genin struggle. "My name is Hitomi, by the way. I'm sorry for not introducing myself earlier; you must think I'm rude . . ."

"I already knew your name from the mission report." Naruto dismissed the woman's distress casually. "I'd appreciate you tell me all you can about the mission – anything that you think will help."

The woman brought her legs up to her chest and hugged them tightly as she began to think. "Well, this isn't the first disappearance in the area. In fact, people have been suddenly disappearing for a long time now, but when the ninja come to investigate, they always say that nothing suspect happened, and they they'd just drowned out at sea."

"So the people going missing are only those that go out to sea?" Naruto asked curiously as he looked up at the troubled woman. "There've been no reported disappearances of people actually _on_ the island?"

Hitomi considered it briefly before shaking her head in the negative. "No, we're a pretty tight community here. If somebody went missing, we'd instantly know about it. It seems that only those that go out to sea are going missing . . . actually . . ."

Seeing her pause, Naruto turned to her again with a raised brow. He said nothing though, and waiting for the woman to talk. He'd had experience with distraught women before during missions; it was never a smart idea to push them.

It was a rather annoying practise, especially considering that every second wasted, was a second they could have spent searching for their target, but there wasn't much he could do.

"Actually . . ." She finally began, her cheeks somewhat flushed as she looked down at the ground and drew circles in the sand. "You're probably going to think this is stupid, but . . . well, there's this rumour that Kika Island is cursed . . . my father-in-law would always tell Ryoshi and I every chance he got that the island was cursed, and to never go anywhere near it." She paused and looked down at Naruto, as if assessing whether she should continue or not.

Naruto very much doubted that any such 'curse' actually existed, that's not to say that the rumour held no value though. Nodding at her with an encouraging smile, she continued.

"One day . . . he went out fishing and never came back. Ninja from mist came to investigate, but they only reported that his disappearance was anything but nefarious." Here, she voice hitched slightly. Naruto got the feeling that she really loved and respected her father-in-law. "They said that he'd run off with another woman, and had shown us photographs to prove it . . ."

"You didn't believe them though," Naruto said in a moment of insight. "Even though you saw the photographs, you refused to believe it."

"Shiko – that was my father-in-law's name – he would never do something like that!" Hitomi denied vehemently. "I . . . I have no family of my own, I was an orphan," she whispered before locking eyes with Naruto once again. "He took me in; made sure I was always looked after. He _loved_ his family, he _loved_ me. There is _no_ way he'd run off with another woman." She laughed bitterly as she shook her head, tears were now pooling in her eyes. "He didn't even have _time_ to fool around. If he wasn't at home taking care of his family, he was out fishing to put food on the table."

"He was last sighted near Kika Island then?" Naruto asked quietly, urging the woman to get back on topic. It's not like he didn't feel bad for her, but he was here to rescue her husband, and tales about his father-in-law were just a waste of time unless they helped to quicken his rescue.

Furiously wiping some of her tears away, she gave a silent nod. "Someone at the docks told us they'd last seen him heading towards Kika. Nobody goes near there because of the rumours, so naturally, the fishing there is best. Around the time he disappeared, his sister got pregnant but didn't have the money to support herself; she had a no-good, dirt bag for a boyfriend too, so there was no way he'd have supported her . . ."

"You think he went out fishing near Kika for a little extra cash then?" Naruto asked the woman curiously. It was possible, of course, and it made sense given how the woman spoke of him, but the ninja she'd hired to investigate the matter had given her photos . . .

"I'm positive," she said resolutely. "There's no way my father-in-law would run off with another woman."

Naruto turned his head and watched as the Genin continued with the Water Walking exercise. Sakura seemed to have mastered the principals, standing above the water and moving around atop it flawlessly, as it if were the very ground. Her movements looked sluggish though – fatigue rearing its ugly face, most likely. Hideaki and Sasuke seemed to be fairly close to mastering the technique as well. It seemed his casual observations earlier had spurned them on in an effort to prove him wrong – not that he was complaining.

"Well, Hitomi – you don't mind if I call you that, right?" With a negative shake of the woman's head, he continued. "I have some good news, and I have some bad news – which would you like to hear first?"

"The good news," she admitted after little deliberation. She'd had enough bad news lately.

"Well, the good news is that your father-in-law most likely didn't run off with another woman," he said with a smile in her direction.

Her eyes were wide with shock. "H-How?"

"There's nothing cursed about Kika Island," Naruto informed her, making some air quotes when he mentioned the word 'cursed'. "Something nefarious is obviously happening on that island, and whoever is there doesn't like visitors."

Hitomi's mouth opened, a retort ready, before it died on her lips. She did this several more times, gaping like a fish before finally voicing the simplest of her thoughts. "T-The Mist ninja?"

"If you're to be believed about your father-in-law's character?" Naruto asked before shrugging nonchalantly. "There're lots of possibilities, one of which being _they're_ the ones capturing people, and only investigated to save face."

"B-But, I hired some Mist ninja before hiring you!" the woman looked just as confused as she probably felt. "They disappeared, just like the others!"

Naruto shrugged again. "I don't know all the answers, but as I said, that's just a possibility . . . do you want to hear the bad news now?"

"I'm afraid to ask," she admitted with a slight grimace. "Your good news didn't exactly inspire much hope . . ."

Naruto didn't speak, waiting for her approval. With a weary sigh, realizing that he was waiting for her, she reluctantly nodded.

"I have no idea who is responsible for disappearances," Naruto admitted nonchalantly. "But of one thing you can be certain – they're definitely ninja."

"I . . ." Hitomi paused, unsure of how to respond to that. "I don't know what to say to that . . ."

"Just trust me," Naruto said with a smile. "Now, not to be rude or anything, but we have a little trip to make to Kika Island – the sooner the better."

"But, they look exhausted," Hitomi blurted out, her motherly instincts kicking in to defend the Genin – who were still mere children in her eyes. "They should at least get some rest . . . especially if going someplace dangerous like Kika Island!"

"They'll be fine," Naruto assured her as he reached into one of his pouches and pulled out three, spherical pills that resembled black marbles. "Oi, eat these!"

He tossed the pills towards Hideaki who handed one each to Sasuke and Sakura.

"Soldier pills?" Sakura asked in confusion, though eating the pill without hesitation. She felt a sudden and pleasant rush of energy soar through her body after the horrible taste left in her mouth from the pill died away, her Chakra reserves restored to full.

"You're giving us soldier pills so we can train longer?" Hideaki asked incredulously. "That's beyond stupid!"

Sighing and rubbing at his temples, Naruto smiled at Hitomi before turning back to his Genin. "No, I'm giving you soldier pills because we're continuing our mission and you'll need to be in top shape if you're to face ninja."

"Ninja?" Sasuke asked with interest. "Finally, a chance to test my Sharingan against a worthy opponent." His statement was finished with a superior smirk being sent towards an annoyed Hideaki.

Sakura looked ready to object, but Sasuke's eagerness stilled any protest she may have had to the situation.

Hideaki looked ready to ask a question, but was stopped when Naruto raised his hand to silence him. "I'll explain on the way," he promised. "Get suited up and go find us a boat. Meet me at the closest pier in thirty minutes; I'll finish things up here."

Despite the Genin's opinions regarding their new Sensei, they knew an order when they heard one. Donning their gear once more, they quickly sped off to acquire a boat as Naruto led an emotionally exhausted Hitomi back to her house.

* * *

Anko sat on the floor in her apartment, clad in nothing but a pair of extremely short shorts, as Jiraiya examined her Curse Seal. The floor had a temporary and elaborate sealing array painted on it to help with the procedure.

"You know," the legendary ninja said casually. "It's kind of hard to concentrate on work with you dressed like that."

"You said you needed me naked." She sat hunched with her hands covering her exposed breasts. "This is as naked as I'm willing to get around you."

"Mhmm." Jiraiya didn't look or sound like he was paying attention. His inked brush swiftly and expertly painted new seals around Orochimaru's mark in a spiral pattern, moving further away from it as he progressed. "I suppose if I were thirty years younger, had blonde hair and a set of cute whisker marks, you'd be singing a different tune."

"I suppose if you were any of those, you'd come off as something other than an old, creepy pervert," Anko said in amusement. "Oh sorry, I mean super pervert."

"Now we're talking," Jiraiya agreed with a chuckle. "Now this addition to the original seal should, supposedly, reduce the amount of sway Orochimaru could have over you if he chose to force it. It'll also reduce the pain it causes you when you have negative thoughts."

"Is that so?" Anko turned her head and grinned at the older man. "Maybe you're not so useless after all."

"Nope, still incredibly useless, I'm afraid." He chuckled. "Naruto's the one who came up with this adjustment."

Anko frowned in disappointment. "Then why isn't he the one applying the seal?"

This time, Jiraiya actually laughed. "He didn't say, but I think you scared him off. You call me a creepy old pervert, but at least I don't scare my chosen partners away."

"He'll come around," Anko said in absolute certainty. "He probably already has, but just hasn't admitted it to himself yet. No man can resist my charms." She groped her covered breasts to emphasize her point. Jiraiya paused in his work, seeing her sexy smirk had him fighting the urge to drop the brush and start taking notes for his next book.

"Well, you're first mistake is comparing Naruto to regular men," Jiraiya advised her sagely. "Does he find you attractive? Obviously, or else he wouldn't turn into a blushing and stuttering little teenager whenever you try and seduce him. Is it having the desired effect though? If you're going for shock value, I suppose it is."

"What're you talking about?" Anko grouched as she tried to look at the older man without moving her neck. "Did he tell you that?"

"He doesn't have to," Jiraiya said in amusement. "I've known him for a fair while – I know how he thinks . . . well, regarding women anyway . . ."

The two sat in silence for several moments as Jiraiya's line of seals began to reach her lower back, he was almost done. Naruto really was a genius when it came to Sealing Techniques, just like his father. To be able to come up with constant countermeasures for the Curse Seal with absolutely nothing to work off of was nothing short of pure genius.

"You're his friend, right?" Anko asked in a much more subdued tone, surprising the legendary ninja greatly. "You got any pointers for me here?"

"If you read my books, you'd find I have hundreds of pointers for you," Jiraiya said lecherously. The room was dim, lit only by a few strategically placed candles around the Sealing Array, but Jiraiya was certain he saw the woman's eyes narrow. "But you weren't asking for pointers on seducing him, you were asking for pointers on befriending him, weren't you?"

Anko stiffened at his words, and Jiraiya was suddenly made aware that he'd hit the nail on the head.

"Unfortunately, I've got no sagely words of wisdom for you this time," he apologized nonchalantly. "However, if you _do_ find out, you let me know. I'd love to know some pointers myself."

"Wait," Anko demanded as she swivelled around to face the older man, breasts – fortunately – still covered by her hands. "Are you telling me you're not friends with him?"

"Not for any lack of trying," he assured. "That boy hasn't got_ any_ friends – well, that's not true. He has one, the girl from the Ramen stand he's always eating at . . ."

"Wait, I thought he was all 'buddy-buddy' with you and the Hokage," Anko said in confusion. "I've caught you three stooges peeking on the girl's bath houses together!"

"Well, we kinda roped him into that one," Jiraiya admitted reluctantly. "We wanted to try and get him to open up, but in the end, all we got – all _I_ got – was a royal beat down by a good majority of the village's female ninja."

"Good times," Anko reminisced fondly. "So you're trying to tell me that his only one friend is the Ramen chick? What about the Uchiha woman?"

Jiraiya seemed to consider her words. "Maybe," he relented. "They may be close, but I always got the feeling that Naruto hung around due to some false sense of obligation or something – not that he doesn't like her, mind you. I just dunno if you could call them 'friends' by definition."

"That's . . ." Anko paused as she struggled to find the right words. "That's actually pretty sad."

"That's life," Jiraiya said with a shrug. "Kid's never been the same since the Uchiha massacre, then that other teammate of his ran off with some douchebag, chauvinistic asshole."

Anko sent the older man an amused look as he shrugged.

"His words, not mine," he admitted. "Anyway, ever since then, the kid's pretty much shut himself out, well, there was that one other girl, but if you ever want to have a pleasant conversation with him, I'd advise _not_ mentioning her."

"Which girl?" Anko asked curiously. She'd never heard of another girl in Naruto's life, only Yugao.

"The Inuzuka girl," Jiraiya answered curtly. "Right foul bitch, that one. The kid was head over heels for her, and to do what she did to him . . ." Jiraiya paused and shook his head ruefully. "Well, let's just say that it cut him pretty deep."

"Inuzuka _Hana_?" Anko asked incredulously as she ran through every known Inuzuka she knew of. The girl was both a hunter-nin and a vet for her family's nin-dog partners. "What'd she do?"

"I'm not one hundred percent sure," Jiraiya shrugged. "But I got the feeling that she cheated on him, after they'd been going out for almost a year. Don't ask me for the details, because I've got no idea. You might want to ask that Ramen girl though if you insist on finding out as much about Naruto as possible . . ."

"I'm not -!" Anko began to retort before sighing. "Whatever pervert, just finish up already."

Grinning, Jiraiya made sure the ink on her body was dry before placing his palm on her Curse Seal. With a liberal application of Chakra, the seals covering her body sprang to life, spiralling inwards towards Orochimaru's mark in an almost hypnotic fashion until, finally, they all disappeared. The Curse Seal glowed a sickly purple for several moments before dying down and returning to normal.

"Are we done?" Anko asked tentatively, surprised by the lack of pain during the procedure. She reached up to her shoulder and gently traced the outline of her Curse Seal, making sure to cover herself with her free arm.

"I guess," Jiraiya shrugged. "Unfortunately, the only way we know it'll work is if Orochimaru tries using it against you sometime in the future, or if you start brooding again. Either way, I performed it as per Naruto's instructions, so any problems you may have should be taken up with him."

"Afraid I'll come after you if I found that you screwed up?" Anko taunted as she covered herself with a baggy t-shirt.

"I like my testes hanging where they are, thank you very much," Jiraiya said, unwilling to incur the wrath of a woman whose temper tantrums were a thing of legend. Though, he wasn't ashamed to admit that it was during these temper tantrums that the woman was at her absolute sexiest. "Until next time I suppose."

"Yeah, whatever," Anko said, dismissing Jiraiya as he disappeared out her front door. "Inuzuka Hana, huh?" Anko mused as she rubbed at the Seal on her neck. "This just got a hell of a lot more interesting . . ."

* * *

"I can't believe you actually stole a boat," Hideaki sighed as he continued to row. "This probably belonged to some poor fisherman who struggles to make ends meet – have you no shame?"

"Commandeered!" Naruto corrected the Fire Lord's son with a grin. "I _commandeered _this _vessel_ with every intention of returning it. We're on a ship now children, remember to use nautical terms!"

"This thing is hardly a ship," Sasuke drawled, sour from being forced into rowing duty alongside Hideaki as their Sensei lounged against the tip of the rickety old boat. "It barely even floats."

"You're right," Naruto said before eyeing Sakura shrewdly. "You really should lose a few pounds; See? You're making our vessel _sink_!"

Sakura closed her eyes and thought of three good reasons why she shouldn't attack her Sensei. It took her a good few minutes, and they were weak excuses at best. Naruto amused himself by watching the vein pulsing on her forehead.

"So you think there're ninja operating on this Island?" Sakura finally asked, after calming down. "You think they're responsible for this latest disappearance and the ones before it?"

"Probably," Naruto said with an indifferent shrug. "There's only one way to find out, I suppose."

"Right, whatever," Sakura replied with a sigh as the four ninja lapsed into a tense silence with only the sounds ores breaking the surface of the water audible for miles. Naruto had briefed them on the situation back on the pier before setting sail. There was no need for talk now, especially when looking for ninja. Even the slightest of unnecessary whispers could tip their enemies off and get them killed.

A quiet splash off to their right caused the three Genin's heads to snap in the direction of the foreign noise.

"Fish?" Sakura asked her teammates quietly as they tried to assess where the sound had come from.

"Possibly," agreed Hideaki with a troubled expression.

"Regardless, we should keep our guards up," said Sasuke grimly.

"Really?" Naruto drawled causing the Genin to spin around and gasp in shock. Standing atop the water with a long, scaly and spike tipped tail held tightly in his grip was a bemused Naruto. "You guys keep saying you're ninja, but to be fooled by a trick as simple as this?"

The Genin couldn't really say anything to that, they were more focused on the tail wriggling and trying to break free from Naruto's grip anyway

Another appendage broke the surface of the water, this time a scaly arm with a webbed hand and razor sharp claws. Quickly sidestepping the desperate swipe from the monster below, Naruto whipped out a kunai and gave the tough skin of the tail a stab before swiftly pocketing the kunai and fishing around in his pouch for something important.

"Keep going," Naruto urged them with clenched teeth, finally finding what he'd been searching for. "I'll keep fish-man busy here, you guys investigate the island."

"What's the matter, are you hurt?" Hideaki asked with concern as Naruto struggled with the tail.

"Hurt? Me?" Naruto forced a laugh. "No, this bastard is putting up a fight though, I feel like I'm a championship fisher here," Naruto said, laughing at his own joke despite the less than amusing situation. "I won't be able to hold on forever, and you guys still can't do the Water Walking technique, so get to shore and explore the island." Here, Naruto used one of his feet to kick away another of the beast's appendages. "That's an _order._ I've got things here, trust me."

The Genin each shared a troubled look before nodding grimly. Sasuke and Hideaki retook the ores and doubled their efforts, rowing with all their might. Sakura, having an idea, utilized her new Water Walking technique to jump out onto the ocean. Running to the back of the boat, she propped herself against the rickety vessel and began to push, helping to drive the boat forward.

Satisfied that the Genin were a sufficient distance away, Naruto immediately let go and leapt backwards, and out of the flailing tail's range. All was silent in the immediate area once again as the beast's tail was submerged once again, and out of sight. The water, a murky black, was too dark to see through, and Naruto very much doubted he'd see more than a shadow even if he tried.

Seeing the ripples in the water before any actual movement, Naruto was able to sidestep as the beast's tail whipped out of the water and tried to pierce his stomach. Narrowly missing the tail as it passed by, Naruto cursed as he began to form a rapid series of hand seals.

"Fine, you wanna play hide and go seek?" Naruto mumbled to himself as his hands paused on a rat seal. "I always _hated_ that game!"

He saw the ripples again, moments before the sea-beast attempted to strike. Just as the tail resurfaced, Naruto leapt back, inhaled deeply, and released a series of small, mud missiles from his mouth. Each missile impacted with the surface of the water with the force of a small bomb, sending torrents of seawater in every direction from the resulting splashes.

Naruto wasn't sure if his attack had struck true, but that wasn't really his goal anyway.

The sea-beast made several more passes at Naruto, while the blonde stubbornly countered with his own mud missiles. There was one thing Naruto was sure of, however, and that was whatever this thing was, it was incredibly fast.

After his eighth mud missile bombardment, Naruto smirked when the attacks seemed to halt. From a bird's eye view, the water surrounding Naruto for a good twenty meters in each direction was darkened further by the excess amounts of mud he had shot into it, rending the immediate area a virtual swamp-lake in the middle of the ocean.

As long as he stood atop the muddy water, whatever was attacking him from below wouldn't be able to see him, just as he couldn't see it.

A splash at his rear alerted Naruto to the beast's presence as he turned to see a large, sphere of water rocketing in his direction. Eyes widening in surprise, he flashed through several more hand seals as a wall of water rose to defend him. As the large, spherical water missile impacted with his wall, the beast leapt out of the water with its claws extended, spinning like a drill.

Fortunately, it had done so several feet to his right. Missing him completely, the human-shaped sea beast submerged itself once more after its failed attack. It had expected him to dodge the missile so he could skewer it.

"He still can't see," Naruto mused to the silence of the night. "He's trying to predict my movements."

Three more splashes, one slowly following the other, and three more speeding water missiles were sent in his direction.

"Okay, so he's _really_ fast," Naruto said as the projectiles closed in on his position. Setting his hands into a ram seal, Naruto focused his Chakra into the water beneath his feet and, like a whale's blow hole, the water erupted and sent him sailing safely up and over the attacks. Turning mid-air, Naruto grinned triumphantly when he noticed his technique had sent the beast from below sailing right behind him.

His grin immediately slipped when he got a proper look at said 'beast'. His skin was grey and scaled, yes, but whatever this creature was, it was definitely a ninja, dressed in ninja attire with human-like features, despite the colour and texture of its skin. The forehead protector with a musical note engraved in the metal was evidence enough of his profession.

"You've got to be kidd -!" Naruto was cut off as the 'beast' screamed.

"Bad move, punk!" The fish-like ninja screamed as he inhaled, his chest expanding almost comically, before spewing out another of those large water missiles.

Frowning, Naruto flashed through another rapid series of hand seals as the very ocean thundered beneath them.

Shooting out of the surface of the water like a rocket, a large dragon made entirely of what looked to be mud slammed into the back of the enemy ninja before moving past him and swallowing the large globe of water whole, destroying the attack as if it were a mere droplet of rain.

Safely landing on the surface of the water as chunks of mud fell around him in droves, Naruto scanned the immediate area before grunting in annoyance. Closing his eyes to concentrate, he felt his enemy's presence quickly retreating towards Kika Island as he let out a weary sigh.

"Why is it that everything evil happening on this continent has Orochimaru's hand in it?" He stretched out a few kinks in his back before swallowing two more of his prescribed pills.

Before he began the short trip towards Kika Island by foot, he let a weary frown mar his features.

That chakra he'd sensed flowing from the enemy ninja was definitely vile. Vile and disturbingly familiar.

A/N: Kinda rushed through this chapter between homework assignments. I'm kind of annoyed with myself. I wrote myself into a corner regarding that fight. It was kind of one dimensional and completely reaction based on Naruto's part since all he could do was respond to the creepy sea-beast's attacks from underwater.

I've also had the massive urge to write either an AU Dynasty Warriors/ Three Kingdoms fic or that HP one up on my profile in between chapters for Tuebor. PM me if you wanna know my idea on the DW/TK one, it's gonna be mostly AU with a 'fourth' kingdom started by an AU who 'tames' Lubu to be one of his generals during the whole Dong Zhuo fiasco. I've had a massive urge to write this every since I started rereading and replaying The Art of War (I bought one with a fancy red cover!) and Dynasty Warriors 6 (the taming idea coming from Diao Chan's Musou Mode. Have the woman be Lubu's reason for fighting, and have the woman extremely loyal to the OC.)

I'm also gonna request another Beta again, as much as I don't want to. I usually like working with only one person, but my current Beta seems really busy. I'm only interesting in someone who's a completely grammar nazi though, and knows what they're talking about. PM me if you're that person.


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